Good Times

So last night was Grey's Anatomy, and I try hard to never miss Grey's Anatomy, but Z doesn't want to watch it, and I can't watch it with other commentators. I need to focus. So, anyway, I always watch alone, and last night was no different. I was in the bedroom with the door closed so I could watch. I had a stack of pillows, with mine on top, while I watched. When the episode was over, I went to the living room to let him know it was over and we could hang out together now. Well, he was in the recliner asleep. (For those of you who watch Grey's, you know it is only 9:00 by this point.) When Z falls asleep like this, it's best to just stay out of his way because he is definitely out of it. So he looks at me when I walk out of the bedroom, and I say, "Were you sleeping?" He sort of mumbles an answer and I can't tell if I'd woken him up or if he was mad about something. But, sure enough, he gets out of the recliner with gusto (he moves really quickly when he's just been woken up – it's strange) and power walks into the bathroom to brush his teeth. Then he turns off the bedroom light (it was on up until this point) and gets in bed. I'm still standing in the living room thinking, "It's only 9:00. I'm not that tired yet." So I go into the office to check e-mail, and read news online. After a few minutes though, I figure that if I wait much longer, I'll wake him up again when I go to bed, but if I go now, it probably won't bother him. (It was about 9:20 by this point.) So I turn out the lights and go into the bedroom. Yesterday Z had to be at work at 7:00 to go to court, so he'd had the alarm clock set extra early and had it sitting on his side of the bed. So, in the dark, I have to go find the alarm clock and take it into the bathroom to reset the time. My eyes adjust so slowly to the dark, so I can't see a thing. Once in the bathroom with the door shut behind me, I turn on the light, set the alarm clock to the correct time, and brush my teeth. Then I brace myself for the dark once I leave the bathroom. The bedroom is not very wide, and my side of the bed is really close to the wall, so I'm always afraid I'm going to bump into furniture or knock a picture onto my head. But I go into the bedroom and it is so dark that it hurts my eyes (you know what I mean?). So dark that I see things swimming out in front of me. Anyway, I feel my way around until I find the bed (by jamming my hip against it) and finally crawl into bed. I lie down and – bam – my head hits the mattress, not my pillow. I realize that Z must have been so deeply asleep when he walked into the bedroom that, even though the light was on, he didn't notice my pile of pillows. Well, I feel around a little, but I don't want to smack him in the face, and I can't see a thing. I figure, maybe I can sleep anyway. It'll be like napping on the couch, just without a couch arm… I fold my arms underneath my head, and I think I even sleep for a few minutes. But eventually it is just too uncomfortable. By now my eyes have adjusted to the dark, so I roll over and, sure enough, Z is fast asleep, practically sitting up, propped up by pillows. And my pillow is on top of the pile. It's pretty funny looking. I don't want to wake him up, but there's no way that I'm going to get any sleep without a pillow (you try it – it's harder than you'd think). So I lean over and whisper, "Can I have my pillow back?" He's sort of like those sleep walkers that you're not supposed to wake up – sometimes he gets crazy. He just mumbles but doesn't wake up. So I whisper, "I'm going to take my pillow back, OK?" So I grab onto my pillow with both hands and pull on it just enough to make him mumble and roll over. When he does, I yank my pillow like those people who pull a tablecloth while leaving all the dishes in place. His head just lingers in mid-air for a second before plunking down onto the next pillow. He never even noticed. This morning I tried to tell him all this, and he didn't remember a bit of it. As a matter of fact, the only reason I told him the story is because he asked when/how he went to bed. So, I had to tell him. I even got in the floor to show him how ridiculous he looked sleeping with his neck straight up. Good times.