Merry Christmas!

I have been unbelievably busy the last couple of weeks, but before Christmas gets here I wanted to go ahead and catch everyone up on the goings on in Prattvegas. OK, so technically we don't live in Prattvegas anymore. But it's so much more fun than saying Millvegas. That sounds dumb and I refuse to do it. So Prattvegas it is.

Two weekends ago we decorated the house for Christmas then had our friend Candace over to visit, along with her new fiancé. We had a good time hanging out, then Z and I went to Birmingham for a wedding. The groom went to law school with Z, and all four of us are good friends now. It was a beautiful wedding, and a fun reception.

Last week my company was full of Christmas activity – each day a department brought food for the rest of the company (we actually did that the week before last too. They call it the 12 Days of Eating), and it all culminated in our Christmas party on Friday. We played Dirty Santa, had a big meal, I read the annual Christmas poem I'd written (and my boss heeeeeeeeeeeavily edited/butchered.) It was fine. There aren't really any other words for it. It wasn't terrible.

Saturday was Christmas at my paternal grandmother's house. She's never really been a cuddly grandmother. I mean, I have my Granny, and then I have my other grandmother. I love her, but we've never been close. When my dad got sick, he moved in with her and she took care of him. After he passed away she got very angry with me and my siblings and accused us of silly things that essentially meant, "They didn't love him or care about him." You can imagine how hurtful that was, and many unkind words were exchanged, especially when it was time to probate my father's will and follow his instructions. She did not like that "the kids" were getting all of his antiques because she wanted to sell them. It was a very hurtful time. So, I still love her, but things have never been the same, and I wasn't exactly looking forward to going. But, it was a very nice afternoon. My aunt and uncle (brother to my dad) live in Montgomery, and they picked us up so that we didn't have to drive, which was terrific. Also, we never visit with them (I don't know why – that side of the family just doesn't cherish togetherness like my mom's side), so it was good to spend several hours in the car catching up. My uncle reminds me of my dad before it got bad, which makes me both sad and happy to be around him.

Sunday we went to church as usual, but that night Z had a Christmas surprise for me. He'd told me not to schedule anything for that evening, and at lunch time he finally told me what it was – he'd gotten us tickets for "A Christmas Carol – The Musical" at the Alabama Shakespeare Festival. If you haven't been there and you're relatively close, you should definitely go – it's beautiful! When I was in the 11th grade, I went there for bonus points in my English class, and somehow I wound up going with my dad, grandmother, and uncle (re-read the paragraph above – what a weird situation. Especially for high school me.) Anyway, even though I'd been to the Festival before, and toured the museum and gardens, I'd never been inside the theater or seen a play there before. Magnificent. The show was really breathtaking. The set was gorgeous, the orchestra was phenomenal, and the actors were unbelievably talented. The voices on those children – tremendous. Not only was I incredibly impressed that my ultimate fighting- and football-loving husband bought us tickets to a musical for Christmas (he loved it!), but I so enjoyed the play that I was nearly in tears the whole time. I will definitely go back. Too bad they had to cancel next year's production of Les Miserables due to budget cuts…

Yesterday (Monday) I called in sick because I had an interview with the Alabama Medicaid Agency that afternoon and didn't want to come up with an excuse to leave work early. It went OK, I suppose, but not great. I don't feel too confident about it, but it's hard to feel confident when you know they're meeting with approximately 20 applicants similar to you… I'd have to sing and dance to stand out.

My bosses, bless their hearts, announced this morning that they're closing the office tomorrow, Christmas Eve. Originally, we were scheduled to work all day, with the hope that if the "bad cop" boss left early, then we could too, but if he stayed, we wouldn't be allowed to leave early at all. I don't like working like that – I want to know what's going on so I can make plans. And we're supposed to be at Z's parents' house (a good 2 hours away when it is NOT rush hour) for dinner time. So, that is a huge deal for me! So we have Christmas Eve with my in-laws, Christmas morning just the two of us at home, Christmas dinner with my Granny and my mom's side of the family, and the day after Christmas at my mom's house with my immediate family. Z can't go to that one though because he has to work that day. Tell me what sense it makes to have your employees come in for Friday alone. I think that's stupid.

I have been finished with all of my Christmas shopping for some time now, but there is still one item that hasn't been delivered yet. I don't think it will get here until Christmas Eve (tomorrow), which makes me anxious, but if it doesn't arrive in time, I'll wrap and give my sister-in-law a picture of her gift!

Wishing you all a merry and delightful Christmas!

So Sensitive

I am at home for lunch with my feelings hurt. That's nothing new. For the past several months, probably, I have been so sensitive I'm even irritating myself. The smallest thing will either make me cry or make me want to lash out. This morning at work I have had poetry critiqued by ignorant people and had to make extensive travel arrangements for one of the editors. Now, if I'd signed on as a personal assistant, maybe this stuff wouldn't bother me, but since I'm the director of marketing, I find it stupid. Anyway, that's not really the problem. It's a compound problem of course, and this morning it was kind of just the last straw.

Trying to make myself feel better, I forced Z to let me get our Christmas tree Friday night even though he had a brief to write which took all weekend. So I decorated it 100% by myself. Again. After he graduated law school I thought I wouldn't have to do things like that by myself anymore. See what I mean? Way too sensitive. He didn't want to get the tree already because he knew he wouldn't have time to do it. But I get depressed if it's Christmas time and I haven't decorated yet. Sigh.

My mind is just going a million different directions today. I'm anxious because I got another job lead with a different state department, but I'm upset because I never heard anything back about the Dept. of Education. I'm mad at my work situation and mad that I'm such a wussy that I just take it. I'm feeling too far removed from my family and friends. I mainly feel trapped at work. I hate it. But my lunch hour is back and I have to leave.

It's been forever...

We are getting a puppy! My work friend's cousin has a chocolate lab that will be having puppies in the next few weeks. When they are ready to leave their mom in early spring, we are getting one, and we're so excited about it! We don't have our backyard fenced yet, but we will by then (although, as my mother points out, labs chew on everything, so maybe we shouldn't get a fence at all and it would chew the neighbor's trouble-maker kid!) Even though two chocolate lab parents can have yellow lab puppies, I'm hoping we get a chocolate lab because I think they're the cutest ones. I think Z would rather have yellow though. We could get one of each and they'd look like my birthday cake when they snuggled! (Yellow cake, chocolate icing – get it? Forgive me, I'm going puppy crazy.)

Christmas will be here before you know it, and we haven't started decorating the house at all yet. This is not necessarily my preference, but since we always get a live tree, I do still want the tree to be full and beautiful when Christmas morning gets here, not naked. I've gotten a good start on my Christmas shopping, but I'm nowhere near done yet. Cooking is one thing I've tackled head on though – it seems like every other day I'm making some new Christmas goodie. (Well, it seems that way ever since Thanksgiving, actually.) Chex mix, sausage balls, chocolate chip cookies, peanut butter pie, chocolate trifle, it's been practically non-stop. I love it though. Last night I tried my work friend's recipe for poppy seed chicken casserole, and it was delicious, in my humble opinion. (Same friend with the puppy connection. I'm actually making friends…)

At work, Christmas is definitely in the air. We've had our official "decorate the office" day, and we've just begun our "Twelve Days of Eating." Apparently they do Christmas big here. I see it as overkill, because I don't necessarily like celebrating the holiest season of the year at work. If you truly want your employees to celebrate, don't make them work Christmas Eve! (Boy do I envy school teachers during the holidays. Seriously, if I had kids I would be so mad about working on Christmas Eve.)

Tomorrow we are having a security system installed at the lake house. It'll help our insurance costs, help me feel better when we're gone all day, and help me sleep better on nights when Z is out of town (which is pretty often now. He travels all over the state for court.) Also, with the promotion they were running, we got lots of incentives, and that helps too. And once that's up, we can finally get our tree! We didn't want to have any gifts under the Christmas tree without having our security system installed.