Prattvegas

Growing Pains

2010-08-17T21:05:00.000-05:00

My assistant went on vacation today. She has worked almost every single day since I hired her, and I am nervous about handling my entire client list without her for 7 whole days. She has been so awesome for my business - quick to do any task I need done, helpful in all aspects, friendly, energetic, fun to be around, I could go on and on. Essentially, she is working out perfectly.

Remember that cat from my last post? It turns out she had 5 beautiful black and white kittens. As soon as they were 6 weeks old we started trying to find homes for them. We placed 2 in good homes, but Sam was beginning to get too playful with the remaining 3 (carrying them around in his mouth, leaving them soaking wet and scared half to death all over the yard, away from their mama), so we had to take the last 3 to the shelter. I keep telling myself that because they're so adorable they will soon be adopted. We didn't take the mama to the shelter because she isn't a tiny cute kitten and we felt sure that she would not be adopted quickly, but would probably be put to sleep. So, we are getting her fixed next weekend and letting her stay with Sam, her best friend. So, now we are a family of 4, although it certainly wasn't intentional. (Her name is Channel Six, for future reference.)

Sheepish Apologies

2010-07-11T15:32:00.000-05:00

I've been absent forever! My bad. I never hired any help back in March when business was booming because along came April. April was an unloading of crappy clients, and I no longer was cleaning 8 hours a day. My dreams of expanding were temporarily squashed. (I'd rather not even talk about May.) But then came June when I got busy enough to re-examine my need for an employee.

I decided to write a job description and finally advertise that I was accepting resumes. Out of about 35 applicants, only 2 didn't seem ghetto or sorry. (Seriously, I asked for a resume and got several applications that said, "I no you asked for a resume but mine ain't been updated in along time, so you can just call me if your interested." Gag.) So, I interviewed two people for the position. One was young, ambitious, willing to learn, easy to get along with, etc. The other met me in sweats, felt shoes were unnecessary, was already blessed with the knowledge of the whole world, and seemed quite pushy. My decision was easy.

After a background check (formality only, but I wanted to start a precedent) and a formal letter to all my clients, my new employee began work. I can't adequately describe how blessed I feel. I just know that after all our wishes, hopes, dreams of the perfect employee, my husband and I couldn't have imagined anyone better. So far she has worked two full days, and her attitude is great. It's been awesome.

Also around March we began the Dave Ramsey Total Money Makeover. I resisted at first, big time. Numbers make my head hurt. I pay my bills on time and in full, but other than that, I hate thinking about it. It stresses me out to no end. But, my husband felt strongly enough about it to convince me, and I'm so glad. It took a couple of months to get into the swing of things. When you're used to putting every purchase on your credit card and paying 6 weeks later, it's really difficult to begin a new month paying for everything now. We essentially bought two months at once, which was a strain at first. After that first month, though, what a difference! Emergencies happened (a lot of them), and we had the money at the ready to cover it. We've had an emergency fund for years now, of course, but now we contribute a planned, regular amount, and it has grown quite a bit. In the past 2 months alone, we had extensive electrical work done to our truck, toilet repairs in our house, the main water line outside burst, flat tires, my car's air conditioner's failure, and other unexpected expenses I can't remember. All in two months! If we were on our old "plan" we'd be so far in debt right now.

About 2 weeks ago, we went outside to put Sam to bed (he still goes in his fence at night so he doesn't get into trouble in the gardens) and smelled that unmistakable smell - cat pee. (Side note, my new tangerine hair conditioner smells like cat pee during hair drying... not before, not after, but when activated by heat - cat pee. Gross.) We thought that was strange, since we have a 100 pound dog in our yard, but didn't dwell on it. A few minutes later, we saw a tiny calico slinking around our hydrangeas at the back fence. Sam was already in his pen and he started jumping on the gate trying to get out. He absolutely LOVES cats. They are, understandably, quite scared of him, but he adores any cat he's ever met. We went ahead and let Sam back out, knowing he'd just bark all night if we didn't let him investigate. So, he ran around in excitement for a long time, scaring the cat pretty badly. Finally, we re-put him to bed and tried to shoo the cat away.

The next morning, we went outside to let Sam out and saw the cat again. In the light of day, her pregnant belly was obvious. We knew we were in trouble. We tried running her off again, but she was obviously starving, because she practically climbed our legs to get Sam's breakfast. Sam, enamored, allowed her to eat dog kibbles to her heart's content, even though I'm sure he was hungry too. We talked that day about taking her to the shelter, but that night, her belly was flat flat flat. Oh boy. The kittens were here and, we later guessed, under our storage building. We're not monsters - of course the cat is staying until the kittens come out and are weaned, and THEN they can all go to the shelter (well, maybe one kitten can stay...)

Sam is so in love. They nuzzle each other, eat all their meals together, she goes into his pen with him at night (she can go in and out as she pleases, of course), he follows her around and tries to play, she has tried to fetch, he rubs his head on our legs now. The whole scenario is hilarious. But, we never intended to have a cat, much less multiple cats (no idea how many kittens there are.) We'll just have to see what happens. I would like to keep a kitten, and I really believe that Sam would get sad and lonely if all the cats went away.

So Tired I Might Throw Up

2010-03-18T17:05:00.001-05:00

How's that for a straight-to-the-point title? Dr. Fallon would be so proud. ("Hit it; don't play with it.") Candace, are you out there? Anyway...

The past few days have been completely out of control. I've had multiple consultations and booked multiple new clients. That, of course, is awesome, but my back HURTS and I'm TIRED now. Two days ago I cleaned an elderly lady's home and she had the heat UPPPPP. By the time I finished mopping her kitchen floor, I was feeling ill. After I was done with the hardwood floors, she wanted to talk for another 30 minutes. Normally, I'm OK with that because she's old and doesn't have many people to talk to. (My dad's one and only weak spot - old people. He worked in home health care for years and after tending to them, he would visit with them. The old people loved him, and they knitted him gifts, gave him puppies, etc.) Anyway, I almost fainted in her freakin floor before I could get in my car and crank up the AC.

Yesterday I worked almost 8 hours (at a desk, not so bad; cleaning non-stop, murderous) and by the end of the day, I honestly thought I would throw up from fatigue. Is that even possible?

Today I cleaned for 6.5 hours and booked another consultation. Since I've been on the brink of needing to hire help, that last consultation pushed me over the edge. Although it will mean a pay cut for a month or so, it will free up some time for more marketing, more clients, more employees, etc., until I'm not cleaning anymore! Hooray!

So, I'm hiring. Pass the word.

In other news (oh yeah, I have a work blog for that crap...) my husband is going as crazy as I am. His office is being turned upside down by a big mistake someone made in a case. And he's having to fix the problem. The big, publicized, millions-of-dollars-on-the-line problem. He's stressing because he travels so much that he's never in the office to deal with it. And now they're considering cut backs, and he's the newest "member of the team." Yeah, I've heard that one...

Somebody keeps killing my daffodils! I think it's that damn blue jay!

Last night I made some delicious chicken and brown rice soup. It was 8:00 before we ate it because, hey, I'm a working girl (as my husband so lovingly describes it), and I didn't even start the chicken until around 6... anyway, it was good. If I didn't have Bunko tonight I'd eat some right now. I don't even have time to wash my hair before Bunko, which pisses me off. I hate going anywhere after I've worked all day. Yesterday I've been at one woman's house for about 4 hours and had just washed the steaming hot shower when her husband came home and she just had to bring him into the bathroom to introduce us. Yes, I love meeting people when I look like a hot mess. I wish they served alcohol at Bunko... (Baptist church group - never going to happen.)

This morning I popped 3 Aleve - I didn't feel any relief. I ate a pb&j sandwich between houses today and realized I'd accidentally bought the wrong kind of bread last time. Damn. Why didn't I notice that when I made toast for breakfast? Maybe because I wasn't truly awake when I ate breakfast.

This weekend I'm going home to my mom's house. A childhood friend is having her bridal tea Sunday, so I'm using that as an excuse to go home for the weekend. While traveling last week my husband spent the night there without me, and it made me jealous. That's my room! I don't even think I've spent the night there since the night before my wedding. Weird.

I'm hungry. I hope we're having something delicious at Bunko.

What is WRONG With Me?

2010-03-12T16:45:00.000-06:00

I am on this blog at least 4 times a week to read other people's blogs, but do I take the time to update my own? Nooo. Right now I'm listening to Martha Wainwright's "B.M.F.A." She is so bad ass. I wish I could be more bad ass.

You know what's really bad ass? My business has literally quadrupled in the last month. That's the real reason I haven't been updating my blog. I haven't even updated my business blog. I've lost 30 pounds by cleaning houses too - bonus!

I've got baby fever more than ever, and that fever, that mania is pushing me forward in my business. Ulitmately, I want to have crews cleaning for me. I'll have to hire one at a time, and eventually my most senior employees will become the managers of the new ones. Then I can concentrate fully on marketing, HR, and meeting new clients. Oh yeah, and having babies. I honestly think I'll have to hire my first person by mid-summer.

Sam is just 2 weeks shy of being one year old! That's hard to believe. Today he woke us up around 3:30 a.m. because he'd chased a nasty possum up our privacy fence. The possum wouldn't hop off into the neighbor's yard, so Sam wouldn't stop his manic barking. Z eventually had to go outside and throw rocks at the possum hoping it would jump. He also threw a rotten potato. But that's another story. One does crazy things at 4 a.m.

This has been the coldest, wettest, nastiest winter ever, but spring is finally getting bolder it seems. Our daffodils and crocuses (croci?) are beginning to bloom, but the unlucky ones are getting decapitated by a particularly ballsy blue jay. He might meet a rotten potato later. We don't have any azaleas or camellias, but it seems like all the neighbors do, and they do really well down here. Those are just beginning to bloom too. I wish we had a dogwood tree. My mind is just going a million miles an hour thanks to work, so I've resigned myself to stream of conciousness blogging. You'll get used to it.

You know what I miss? The O.C. Don't hate - it was a good show for about one and a half seasons.

My favorite part of the winter olympics? The opening ceremony when k.d. lang sang "Hallelujah" which I'm listening to now. She brought it. OK, now "Tik Tok" is on. It's a terrible song, in that I'm terribly ashamed to admit I freakin love it.

Tonight I'm having dinner with my old work friends because one of them is moving away for a new job. That bank failure seemed like the end of the world, but it's been beyond a blessing for me.

I am thinking of opening a bookstore as my next business venture. If you live in my town, don't steal my idea. It'll take me a few years to raise that kind of money. If you are from Montevallo, it might be similar to Eclipse. It depends on how bad ass I'm feeling at the time...

Seriously, yesterday I took a shower after working all morning, during which I missed four phone calls on my business cell. I called them all back and booked FOUR consultations in ONE hour. No, really. But that's a post for my business blog, which you'd better be reading. Maybe I'll update it tomorrow. (Probably not - I've got a consultation tomorrow!)

I got to fire my first client a couple of weeks ago. What a rush. It was liberating, awesome, intoxicating even. OK, that's a bit of a stretch. But it was a power trip.

I miss blogging. This has been fun. Let's do it more often.

It's Flippin' Freezing!

2010-01-11T13:48:00.000-06:00

For the past 10 days or so, the South has been plunged into a deep freeze. It's been a constant reminder of my favorite portrayal of hell - Dante's icy prison. When it is literally painful to go outside, how can you not think of Dante?

Our spoiled doggy Sam has been sleeping indoors for the past seeeeeeveral nights, and before I hear any crap about me and my "strictly outdoor" dog, we really didn't have any other options. We don't have a garage, which was my parents' answer to dogs and freezing temperatures. Sam is also just 9 1/2 months old and a LAB which means he devours even the least appetizing items, such as car magnets, thorny rose bushes, clothes dryer vents... you get my drift. So, making a doggy bed for him on the porch, complete with a space heater or heat lamp was definitely not an option. So, at 6:00 on the first night with lows below 30 (that was my personal limit for him to sleep outside. Not that I'm a monster when it's above 30 - his dog house is crammed full of warm cozy hay) we found ourselves at Tractor Supply looking at those kennels you can put in the bed of a truck when you take your lab duck hunting. Right... By the way, those things are around $90 for the "lab-sized" version. We high-tailed it to Wal-Mart, hoping to find something cheaper. We did! We found a foldable version that is made out of tent material. My mom calls it a pup tent. Ha ha, get it? Anyway, it was more like $30, so even though we thought there was a chance of Sam chewing his way out of it, we decided it's only short term, so if it doesn't work, we'll buy the expensive one next winter! We also bought him a new bone to occupy him inside his new tent.

That night we set up the tent in the master bathroom, in case there were any accidents. Let me remind you - our house was brand new when we bought it. It's very nice. Although most of our furniture was handed down from various relatives, the house itself is quite nice, so Sam doesn't ever come inside. The last time he'd come in was the 4th of July because he was still very little and the fireworks scared him. So, a towel on the cold tile (I know, I'm spoiling him), then his pup tent, then his own, "already kind of has a smell to it" blanket, and his new bone. All waiting for bed time.

After he ate his dinner (with hot water poured on top to warm him up of course) we waited about an hour for him to go to the bathroom and get all his playing done. Then we brought him inside. We turned off all the lights except the TV and waited for him to settle down. Surprisingly, he was on his best behavior. I know labs are smart, but he was acting like he knew this was a privilege and that if he acted up he'd be out in the cold. So he stretched out beneath the couch and took a nap! He hasn't fallen asleep in front of us in MONTHS and he has more energy than should be possible, so this was pretty incredible. He woke up everytime one of us moved, but in general, he was great. At bed time he was so excited to find a bone in the tent that he didn't even notice we'd zipped him up and gone to bed!

This worked out really well. We let him outside first thing the next morning, and we've been repeating this every night since then. There have been no accidents in the house!

Hope all of you have been staying warm. Can't wait for this Inferno-esque weather to end.

Boring Details

2009-12-10T10:46:00.000-06:00

Lately my blog has been a bunch of boring details about my new business. Well, never fear! I just created a blog specifically for Spotless, so this blog can continue to be about other, much more important things. Like the fact that we had Sam fixed last week and it broke my heart. Or that for our 2nd anniversary, my hubby and I went to the Smokies for a romantic getaway. Or that for Thanksgiving I once again travelled to TN for our family reunion, but this time my hubby stayed home.

So, for those of you who want to stay in the loop with my new blog, here it is: http://spotlessmontgomery.blogspot.com/

Enjoy!

Marketing Myself

2009-10-28T10:30:00.003-05:00

It feels strange to market yourself. I've marketed companies I don't believe in and companied I used to believe in (until they failed), but me - who I know to be trustworthy, dependable, and all that good stuff - it feels strange to market "me."

I have created a new website, created a facebook page for my company, passed out my business cards left and right, and created and ordered 500 copies of new fliers touting my awesomeness. But the next step is hard. Next I have to visit neighborhoods and literally go door to door passing out my fliers and talking myself up. I wish this thing could have grown bigger, quicker, by word of mouth alone, but considering I haven't pulled in a regular paycheck in months, I can't wait around for that to happen. Christmas is coming up, and although I'm already scouring my house for wonderfully inspired homemade gifts, we all know we need money at Christmas.

I'm hoping that the more clients I get, and the happier I keep them, the more people they'll eventually tell about me. But when I get a good hair cut, I don't automatically shout the stylist's praises from the rooftop. Why not? I feel bad now for not passing the word about good service I've received my whole life.

In the past two weeks, I have gotten 2 definite new clients, 1 that had to cancel her appointment and will (hopefully) reschedule for next week, and a few inquiries. Meanwhile, I've been very fortunate to keep my first client - I've been cleaning her house for 5 weeks now, and considering she's family, I don't see her firing me. But I've been known to jinx myself...

Anyway, the printer I hired to make 500 copies of my new flier (on bright green paper!) offers free deliver. I was expecting the lady about 2 hours ago, but she's not here yet. So, for now, I don't have to worry about pounding the pavement with fliers in hand. I must say, though, drumming up business for myself is SO MUCH BETTER than the months and months I've spent since college passing out my resume and trying to find a "real" job. Arrogant office workers are the worst.

To sum it up, it's hard to ask people to hire me. But I have to do it anyway. So, anyone know of someone in the River Region needing housecleaning? I happen to be great at it.

Spotless

2009-10-20T16:22:00.002-05:00

Well, my business is up and running. OK, up and jogging. We're maybe at a steady trot.

I only have 2.5 clients right now, and a couple of possibilites. But - I just got my new business cell phone complete with phone number with the correct area code so as not to confuse people. I also just received my beautiful business cards (with the old number of course...) along with note cards to leave my clients. I'm in the process of designing a flier and will start harassing people in the tri-county area door-to-door once they're complete.

So, we're trotting, but soon we'll be running. Soon I won't feel so scared about paying bills. Soon I'll finally be able to start putting some money back into the savings account instead of the other way around. Soon my schedule will be full and I'll be making much more than I did in a traditional office job but I'll have the flexibility to vacation when I want and listen to my iPod all day. So, I hope soon gets here soon!

My Decision

2009-09-18T07:57:00.004-05:00

I have decided to start my own house cleaning business. I've already placed an ad in the paper and have 2 clients ready to go. A designer friend is creating business cards, letter head, etc. for me. The only problem: I don't have a name settled yet. At first I was just going to clean houses. But I realized that with my organizational obsession and my marketing background, I wanted to go all out - invoices, Christmas cards, separate phone number. So I need a name. Not cutesy or a play-on-words, but classy and professional. Any suggestions? I've received Classy Cleaning or Cleaning with Class as suggestions - do you like either of those? I don't want to incorporate my name or in any other way use a fly-by-night sounding name. My target audience is working professionals who don't have the time to clean house themselves. Any thoughts? Additionally, I'm looking for a slogan to go along with this name. Thanks in advance for any help.

What Should I Do?

2009-09-08T08:27:00.002-05:00

No, seriously - what should I do? I have been unemployed for a month now, and I have no leads. No interviews. No nothing. I've been considering lots of alternative options, and it's time I put them down "on paper" to view the pros and cons.

When I graduated with a BA in English, I chose not to go into the education department for my master's because I thought it was stereotypical for a woman to teach. I just didn't wanna and I resented everyone for asking me what I was going to do with my degree. When I was a junior in college I got a to-die-for internship with Southern Living magazine because I knew I wanted to go into publishing. I thought I was set after that internship, but that didn't turn out to be true, and because of one very negative, very vocal person who never actually worked with me, I could never put it on a resume. It was all pretty much for nothing.

After I graduated, I had a hard time finding work mostly because my fiance and I lived 2 hours apart and we didn't know where we were going to live after the wedding - so I didn't know where to find a job. I finally moved to Tuscaloosa where he lived, and I found a good job there - in publishing. My career was off to a fine start. But when he graduated and was offered a job 2 hours away, I had to quit. He was going to be the main bread winner, so it would be stupid for us to stay because of my job.

I spent 3 months being unemployed before I found another job in publishing - but this time the title was marketing. I didn't know anything about marketing, but this company didn't know the difference. They were pretty stupid. And bad at business, because less than a year later they had to lay off about 1/5 of the company, and I was included.

Because the COO of that company often used a particular temp service, she referred me there and told me they would take care of me. She was right - one week later I was earning almost double in a great job. It was temporary, but my superiors praised me constantly and were actively trying to hire me permanently. The one problem - it was a failing bank. Despite all their efforts, they had to let me go 6 months later, and after 2 more temporary assignments in a different department (about 2 weeks long each), the bank failed. It has now been sold to a bank from North Carolina, and all my friends are scared for their jobs. I can kiss all those contacts goodbye.

So, here I sit feeling more and more worthless every day. Career-wise, I want a fulfilling job that pays a decent amount and gives me a decent amount of freedom (read, I never want to clock the hell in again). But most importantly, I don't want to work when I have small children. If I have to go back to work once all my children are in school, that is one thing, but I am quite adamant about raising my own babies. Talk about a cross roads.

Some of the options we've discussed include me honing my photography skills and slowly growing a business (I blogged about this); going back to school for my master's in education (same hours and holidays as future children); getting my realtor's license (a dream I once looked into about a year ago); and starting a business of another sort (we've discussed several).

Photography: It is a hobby right now - nothing more. I would need to take classes, purchase equipment, etc. It would take a long time to grow this into a profitable business. Big risk of failure, I suppose. Also, lots of work on weekends.

Back to school: This might be my best option, but I would have to find a job in the meantime and take night classes. That doesn't sound so bad, but stupid me who didn't want to do the 5th year program (one year) might be looking at 3 years of classes due to No Child Left Behind requirements. I have applied for admission to a school here and am waiting on their official evaluation of my transcript to see which hoops I'll have to jump through. Long term, this would be a good option because I could teach once my children are of school age. Short term, I don't know how I would pay the bills. I can't take out a student loan because the law school student loan is like another mortgage payment and we don't need more payments. My biggest issue here is the thought of taking 3 years of classes, teaching 1 or 2 years and then taking off possibly up to 10 years while I have children and wait until the youngest is in school before beginning again.

Realty: When I was unemployed during the summer of 2008, this is an option I considered. I read books, did research, polled friends in the business, etc. It seemed like a good idea, but the main problem was cash - we didn't have any. My husband's job was delayed indefinitely as soon as we unpacked the U-Haul, and we went into conservation mode. Neither of us earned any money for about 2 months, and I didn't for another month after that. Our credit cards were nearly maxed out and we simply couldn't put any money into any ventures. Now we're in a different situation - it took us about a year, but we paid off the cards, we have a good chunk in our savings account, and we might be able to swing this. Hopefully by the time I'd be licensed the housing market would be looking better.

Another business: We have also looked into all kinds of self-employment. We would both love to be self-employed. Being cooped up in an office where someone else calls the shots has never set well with either of us. We've looked into owning a few franchises. One seemed promising, but they wouldn't return my calls, so they're obviously not the kind of company I'd want to work with. Another seemed great, but it would be too expensive right now.

Last option: I was approached several weeks ago by a church friend who doesn't have a regular job - she cleans houses. She had too many and asked if I wanted to join her and clean the houses she didn't have time for. At the time I was so not into this option. Now, I am considering it. If I could get enough houses, the money would be great. She charges $30 an hour, but I would imagine most people paying to have their houses cleaned only have it done twice a month.

I don't have a clue.

I'm a Loser, Baby

2009-08-25T09:09:00.003-05:00

I'm a total loser for not posting anything in such a long time. It's not that I haven't had anything going on. I have done another temp assignment for the same company I've been with off and on for 8 months. That bank failed the day after my last assignment ended, and after being taken over by the FDIC, it was purchased by another bank based in NC, so all my friends now feel that their jobs will disappear in a few month's time. That's probably true.

I am participating in a weight loss challenge with the girls from my Sunday school class. So far I've lost about 10 pounds (3 weeks in).

Last weekend we went to the beach with my mom, step dad, brother, and step brother. My sister went too, but we were there at different times.

All last week I had some dreadful summer cold. I lost my voice while at the beach. I had a terrible cough and was sort of miserable for a few days. Glad that's over.

My puppy is trained to the underground fence now. He is such a champ. He's also almost 50 pounds now. We almost can't pick him up now.

I don't have a job.

I will try to be better, but that's all I've got for now.

Lay-offs suck!

2009-07-09T14:21:00.002-05:00

I just found out that my good friend at my old job was let go today. I've never even met her, as I worked at corporate headquarters and she worked in South Florida, but we spoke almost daily and worked together on numerous projects. She also went to bat for me more than once, trying to get my temp job to turn permanent. She was an SVP. I didn't expect her to be let go. Now I'm trying to find her on the Internet because all I have is her professional contact info. Lay-offs suck.

Unemployment Breeds Creativity

2009-07-07T15:52:00.002-05:00

So I haven't blogged in a month... It's been a whirlwind for me. Quick update: I left my last job with tears and good-bye lunches. I was sad and disappointed. After a week of wishing I could permanently stay home, I got called for a temporary assignment with the same company I'd just left, but in a vastly different department. The job was horrible, the pay was horrible, and the coworkers were horrible. Two weeks later, it was over.

So here I am, unemployed again and being super productive at home. I am on top of all the chores, laundry is done, I feel relaxed that I don't have to drive in rush-hour traffic and come home to a pile of things to do.

During all this transition (there's a word I'm sick of) I have made a decision. Z and I would really love it if I could stay home once we have children. On the other hand, we'd really like to afford things. With all of my career changes lately, we've been thinking about the types of things I could do either once we have children or once the children are school-age. Going back to school for my masters in education was a topic, but I ultimately don't think that's for me. And we'd still have the problem of me working on someone else's schedule.

For a long time now, I have been very interested in photography. I want to learn more and practice more, with a quality camera. I have decided to pursue this now, while searching for a job and ultimately keeping a day job, until I am secure enough to make photography my career - children's portraits, family sessions, weddings, etc. I plan to do it all. Down the line I might even have a studio, who knows? What I do know is that I have been lacking a creative outlet since I left school and don't have opportunities to write (I know, that's what this blog was for...), and I need to be creative. I also need to quit working for companies that don't appreciate me or appropriately compensate me. That isn't to sound snobby, but it's a fact that for the past three years I've been largely underpaid, underappreciated and unhappy in my career choices. There was a brief 5-month window where I loved my job, but with this economy, I couldn't count on that, and I was laid off. I am ready to make success for myself.

I am weighing my options right now on which camera I should purchase. I've been asking photographer friends, researching different brands and styles, and comparing prices. Once I decide on the best I can afford, I will buy it and begin practicing. You'll probably see some of my early attempts at great art here, but I'll eventually start a separate photography blog. I guess we'll see.

Here's to stepping out on a limb, which I pretty much never do. Ever.

I got a puppy... and got laid off

2009-06-02T21:33:00.002-05:00

Last Friday was an eventful day. From early morning to late at night it was chock-full of emotion. As soon as I got to work, I was called into my boss’s boss’s office – for most people, this would be scary, but I wasn’t scared because I thought this was a specific meeting I’d been anticipating. I was wrong. She started out with buttering me up and then she said that she wasn’t going to be able to keep me past June 12. If you’ll remember, I was only a temp, but since February I’ve been practically promised a permanent position. Then, just a few weeks ago I was told that although there’s a hiring freeze, they would extend my temp contract until the end of the year. And now I’m gone in 2 weeks? I cried. She cried. It was a total shock. After that news, I spent the rest of the day talking with my work friends (they’re all scared they’re next, and rightly so) and generally wondering what’s going to happen.

My crappy day was about to get a lot better though. That night, Z and I drove to Sylacauga to see some puppies for sale. We went looking for a white lab, but one of the chocolates stole our hearts and we picked him instead. On the way home, we named him Sam. One of my work friends who lives in my neighborhood had offered to loan us a dog house and some toys, etc., until we got prepared. So, she came over to visit with us for a while. After she left, we walked around the block a few times with Sam to tire him out (it was pretty late) and go to bed. Well, as you can imagine, he was awfully lonely in his “pen” and cried quite a bit.

Let me explain. We are going to be using an underground fence once Sam gets a little bigger. We also put up a chain link fence in one corner of the backyard for Sam to sleep and stay safe while he’s a baby. We call it a pen, but it is actually 30’ x 30’ and nicely shaded, etc. So I know the word “pen” sounds awful, but it’s a very nice area, trust me.

Anyway, that night, we knew he would cry all night because he was accustomed to sleeping with 13 roly-poly brothers and sisters and he was obviously lonely. So, we brought him up to the porch and we slept on the chaise lounges all night. Saturday dawned cool and clear – a beautiful day. We took a walk very early waiting for Tractor Supply to open so we could get Sam a collar, leash, food dish, etc. We have a great neighborhood for walking – it’s a quiet, older neighborhood, and it’s on a lake, so it isn’t all blocks but a very lovely view. Later we went to Tractor Supply where we pushed two buggies – one for the merchandise and one for the puppy to sleep in! Sam was a big hit there! Next we went to PetSmart to find “pig ears” (yuck) but he did not like that place – I think there were too many smells. We went home for a while and called around to find a vet because he was due for his first shots. Around 11:00 we found a vet and took Sam for his first visit, where he did very well despite the large, barking dogs in the waiting area. We went home and played with our puppy and ate lunch before taking our cars to get oil changes. We decided to put Sam in his pen during these errands because he’d been napping in the floorboard of the car all morning and we wanted to let him play in the grass. But, we were also very nervous to leave him there alone – he’d never been alone before. We both drove to Wal-Mart, dropped off one car, drove back home, waited 30 minutes, drove back, dropped off the other car, drove back home, waited 30 minutes, drove back and came home with both cars. Whew – Sam seemed to handle it OK.

That evening, our jerk neighbor kids began playing basketball around 10:00 (my mother would have had a fit if I’d done that. When was the last time you listened to someone playing basketball in the dead of the night, right beside the water? That crap is loud!), so we had to bring Sam on the porch because his pen kept getting a basketball bounced against it. Z and I watched Soprano’s while Sam napped on the porch. When the neighbors finally went inside, Z put Sam to bed. A little later, Z fell asleep on the couch (what a long day) and I checked e-mail and the like, listening to the silence. About an hour later, I woke Z up so he could get in the bed and I finally collapsed on the bed, utterly exhausted. Not 5 minutes later, Sam woke up and started crying (not yet able to fully bark) and whining. Trying not to wake Z, I crept out the door to go check on my baby. I went in his pen to sit with him and soothe him. After about 45 minutes he fell asleep at my feet. I literally tip-toed out of the pen and into the house. I slept on the couch for about 2 hours until I heard Sam wake up again and begin to cry. Exhausted, I put my shoes back on and went back outside. Although it was frustrating, it was also heart breaking because I knew he was scared and lonely. I was only outside for a few minutes when Z came out too. We visited with Sam for a while and then decided to tire him out by walking around the neighborhood again. It was about 3:30 a.m.

After that, we tried the pen but Sam was just too sad, so Z slept on the couch while Sam slept on the porch. Our porch is right off of our living room, and all the windows were open, so Sam was OK with that arrangement.

That morning, I told Z he should stay home and rest while I went to church, but I left after the choir sang the anthem. I got home and we ate lunch and played with the puppy for a long time. Z cut grass which didn’t scare Sam at all. Around 6:00 that evening we took our inflatable boat out on the lake with Sam, thinking he’d have fun swimming, as labs love the water. But, as soon as we got out there I got scared wondering if swimming is completely instinctual or if there was a chance he’d sink… the lake was once a rock quarry and it’s unbelievably deep immediately off the shore, so if anybody’s sinking, there’s probably no finding them. So, like a scared mama I held him in the boat and he finally gave up and napped while Z and I paddled around.

After our boat trip, we went on a walk, eventually visiting my friend’s house to let her see how much Sam had grown in 2 days. We finally got home around 8:30 and fed Sam his dinner. (Each time we put him in the pen, we make sure to stay with him, talking, playing, whatever so that he doesn’t associate the pen with sadness or loneliness. We also feed him there so he’ll have something to look forward to when we walk towards the pen.) He was very sleepy, so he settled down immediately and we went inside so we could eat dinner too. We ate around 9:30 and I’ll be damned if at 10:00 those basketball jerks came outside again, slamming the ball into our privacy fence, yelling cuss words and waking up my baby. Sam started his psycho barking (yes, he learned how to bark rather quickly) and digging at the fence line trying to get at the ball. We were completely exhausted, frazzled and livid. I had to go to work the next day – I couldn’t stay up all night with a baby puppy! Furious with those neighbors, we brought Sam up to the porch again and he immediately fell asleep. It was around 11:00, way past my pre-puppy bedtime, and we just wanted to sleep, so Z volunteered to sleep on the couch again rather than risk moving Sam and waking him up. All three of us slept like logs.

Monday morning I got up at 5:00 for work, and went outside where Z was sitting with Sam. We played for a while, and then they went on a walk while I showered and got ready. Thankfully Z had Monday off work except for one mid-morning meeting, so he had almost all day to spend with Sam. When I left for work though, I started crying. My heart was breaking for this little puppy. What had we done? Why did we get a puppy to disrupt our lives when everything was so peaceful? How was I going to make it through the day sleep-deprived and guilty? Would Sam be OK while Z was gone for a few hours?

Z called me at work when he got back home. He said that Sam had been so upset while he was gone that he threw up his breakfast. However, that must have been the breaking point for him because after that, he acted so much calmer. He began entertaining himself with toys in the pen instead of frantically digging under the gate. He took a nap on some ice that Z poured on the porch, he played in the yard with Z. (Sam is also getting much better about not staying right under our feet. He ventures out into the yard without us. In short, my little baby is growing up!)

When I got home from work, I couldn’t believe my eyes. He was in the middle of his pen happily chewing a toy, not barking or crying. Amazing! After a quick trip to Wal-Mart to get him a new toy (now that we know what he likes) we played with him all evening, even letting him swim in the lake a little. After we ate dinner, we went on a very long walk where we visited with a nice neighbor. When we got back we fed Sam his dinner and sat with him for a while. When we went inside around 8:30 he didn’t make one peep.

Z had to leave on business that night, so I was on my own with the puppy. I got out the laptop so I could listen out for Sam and still look for jobs. Even when those mofos started playing ball again (Seriously? What are they, allergic to the sun?), Sam handled it with ease. He certainly woke up, but he just watched them without having an anxiety attack. Around 10:00 the sprinklers came on, and as these are pretty loud and make scary noises, I wasn’t surprised that Sam started crying a little. So, when the sprinklers in the backyard went off and I could walk outside, I went to go visit with him before I went to bed. I just sat with him in his pen, pointing out his water which he sometimes forgets to drink, playing fetch with him (he’s still learning the concept) and petting him. OK, I admit that I also sang lullabies to him, but he liked it! After about 30 minutes I went inside, and he – ready? – slept/stayed quiet until 6:00 this morning!

This morning I did everything to get ready for work except put on work clothes and then I went outside to play with Sam. I was so proud of him! We walked around the neighborhood a little until we saw a very large dog with no leash at which point I picked Sam up and went back home. He had breakfast and then I went inside to change. While I finished getting ready for work he did go psycho for about 10 minutes, but then he must have remembered his manners because by the time I left, he was completely fine! I’m such a proud mama!

End of Birthday Week - End of Marketing

2009-05-17T14:28:00.002-05:00

There has been so much going on lately! The lady I've been temping for returned to work last Monday - what an emotional roller coaster that was. I felt like I was losing my job, being demoted, turning into an outcast. For three months I had been praised and complimented on my work. I was even told that I did a better job than the actual employee. And for three months I was told the department was trying to employ me permanently, that they'd make a place for me because I was valuable to them. I hoped and prayed that the woman would decide to stay home full time - that she would quit. I knew I was setting myself up for disappointment, but I hoped it anyway.

Well, she came back and it's been a bit of culture shock. All of a sudden I was being left out of conversations, excluded from meetings, and generally being treated like a temp whose time was up. It was depressing. The good news is that they worked out a deal so that I will stay there but work in the Communications department. Communications is part of Marketing, but a tiny part. There is only the director and her one employee who is an Asst VP. And I'm going to remain a temp - one guess who will get all the bitch work. I'm grateful to remain there, but it's been difficult for me to show my gratitude this past week. Tomorrow is my first official day in Communications.

This past week was my birthday. The day itself was pretty much a normal day except my work friends took me to lunch and my hubby took me to dinner. Other than that, I was waiting for my birthday cookout this weekend. I'd invited my mom and stepdad, brother, sister and her new boyfriend to our house for a cookout. I made Z wait until then to give me his presents.

The cookout was yesterday and it was great. Z cooked a boston butt and everybody else brought food too. I got to show everyone all the hard work we'd done in the yard - plus my sister hadn't even seen my house since the day she helped me paint, before we moved in.

I got lots of great gifts too - right now I'm downloading music onto my new iPod from Z!

I'm kind of dreading tomorrow - just a little.

Job Woes

2009-04-30T06:18:00.002-05:00

We can't get a puppy because we shouldn't purchase a fence. My job situation is too uncertain right now. They've been telling me since February that they're going to hire me, but it's one excuse after another. All they can do is extend my temp contract through 7-31. Still no promise of a job after that. So, no puppy.

Almost Puppy Time

2009-04-11T18:48:00.002-05:00

Today we've been preparing to finish our fence. We went to Lowe's and Marvin's to price all the pieces we'll need. Then we spent the afternoon clearing brush, smoothing out humps in the yard, etc. I also did housework - laundry, dusting, cleaning the kitchen and bathrooms...

We had our first rose bloom today! It's a red one, but in the rose garden there are many buds, and I think the next one to bloom will be yellow.

Tomorrow is Easter and I'm excited. I have to be at church at 8:10 for choir rehearsal. After singing in both services, I'll be headed to B'ham to Granny's house. (That reminds me, I need to go to the store so I can make my blackberry cobbler...)

We might get a puppy in time for my birthday!

Spring has Sprung in Prattvegas

2009-03-26T19:22:00.003-05:00

At the beginning of March, I received the starter for Amish Friendship Bread, a delicious dessert-y bread, from a friend at work. It's a 10-day starter with tons of ingredients and even more calories, but it is goooood. I made it for the first time in early March. Each batch makes 2 loaves, so I decided to keep one for ourselves and give one to some neighbors. While you're preparing the bread, it yields 4 more starters (that you're supposed to give to friends). Z loved the bread so much that I decided to keep all 4 starters and make all the bread to give away to people. So, 10 days later, there I was baking 8 loaves of bread (a total of 6 hours, not including the time I spent driving to the store after round 1 for more cinnamon and flour.) I was able to share bread with lots of people, and it was fun! I only kept 1 starter that night, and I'll bake that tomorrow, just in time to share with Sunday School friends on Sunday.

Last week was my step father's birthday, so Friday night we gathered at a restaurant in Alabaster for dinner. Afterwards we went to my sister's house for presents and dessert. It was very enjoyable - I love my family.

Also last weekend, Z and I put up our privacy fence. Now, we live on the lake and normally love our view (Canadian geese walking around our yard, for an elegant example), but the neighbors whose yard is against our backyard are downright junky. Spare tires, tin-roofed chicken coop, broken toys, etc. Plus, our back porch looks straight into the side of their house, so when we sit on our porch, it looks like we're staring at them. So, we only put a privacy fence on that one border. I know, I know, it could easily be taken as an insult. Believe me, I stewed about this for months. But, I like to think that they appreciate the privacy we gave them, too. So, Saturday morning we borrowed our Sunday School teachers' old truck and went to Lowe's to buy the lumber. While we were checking out, we saw some church friends and their adorable 2-year-old daughter. We invited them to dinner after we were all done working in our respective yards.

Saturday Z started putting up the fence while I painted the wood trim on our storage building and planted flowers. Then our friends came over and we grilled burgers. Their little girl kept us all entertained. She liked "reading" my poetry books, helping me cook french fries, and pretending the tiki torches (for mosquitos) were burning her (she was nowhere near them, but she kept putting her hands over her face and saying, "Ow - it's burning me!')

The next morning we went to church (my first Sunday to sing in the choir) and started in the yard as soon as we ate lunch. We worked on the fence for 7 hours straight, until it was slap-out dark. But we finished it, and it looks great!

Our yard is beginning to look really beautiful. We have jasmine and honeysuckle growing on the arbor, wisteria in the woods, the lawn is greening by the minute, our rose bushes are growing (except the one we had to replace - hey, 1 out of 16's not bad). Our neighbors have gorgeous azaleas that have been blooming for weeks. Our daffodils are wonderful, and although only one tulip is blooming, its bright red bloom is amazing. And did I mention the Canadian geese wandering around the yard all day? Spring is breathtaking, really.

Blog Explosion

2009-03-10T17:21:00.002-05:00

Wow - talk about being a slacker. Of all the millions of things going on in my life this past month or so, blogging has not been one of them. I feel like I haven't had a moment to catch my breath since I've started my new job. Not that I'm complaining, but I certainly have a lot of catching up to do here. Ready? Here we go.

1. I had my first real bonding opportunity with the women from my Sunday School class during the first weekend of Feb when they invited me on their annual retreat. It was in an almost luxury cabin in the woods. We all spent the weekend relaxing, sharing, getting to know one another better, etc. It was very nice to be able to get away for a while and have some girl talk. I've been starved for girlfriends since leaving college and leaving my friends in Tuscaloosa.

2. Now for the main reason I haven't been able to blog about anything. My mentor at work (the woman I'm filling in for during her extended maternity leave) wound up leaving a couple of days earlier than planned and left me flying solo. That's not completely accurate - I have lots of kind and helpful coworkers, but they have their own mountains of work to do. Seriously though, the woman I'm filling in for is in charge of all local and regional marketing, including coordinating grand openings of new branches, in all regions of all of our states, plus assisting with corporate advertising. That's a ton of responsibility, and I love every minute of it. It's beyond stressful, but I freaking love it.

3. Another even that, under normal circumstances, would have warranted its own post is that my friend Candace got married. On Valentine's Day she married her sweetheart in Knoxville. Yes, Knoxville. We wound up spending about 14 hours in the car, I believe, and we missed watching the beautiful bride walk down the aisle. That was extremely upsetting, but it really didn't seem to bother her. (She's not quite as sentimental and all-around sensitive as I am.) The wedding was nice - small, but nice. I could tell that the mother of the bride had put lots of creativity into the event, and I hope the happy couple loved every minute of it. It's totally surreal to imagine her married.

4. I briefly blogged about this already, but on Feb 16 (President's Day - it's awesome to work for a bank and have a spouse who works for the state), we had our new storage building "installed" (it was built on our property, not delivered) and Z and I built our porch swing frame with an arbor around it. It was cooooooold that morning, and we were out in the backyard pounding raildroad stakes into 4x4s. Talk about sturdy. The next weekend we created a rose garden in our backyard. Along with 16 rose bushes, it contins an iron, decorative hanging plant stand which holds 4 hanging plants, 2 birdfeedsers, and the most gorgeous stained bird bath you've ever seen. Even though the roses are nowhere near blooming yet, our backyard looks so much better! (The product of two people raised in the country and cooped up in dorms and apartments for the past 6 years.)

5. Of course during the last weekend of Feb we had tornadoes and snow like just about everyone else in AL, but Z and I also had a lovely visit to Hoover that weekend to shop for work clothes at the Galleria and meet some family for dinner at the Fish Market Restaurant. Since we live about 2 hours away from just about everyone now, we have to grab those little moments when we can - and it was a very fun evening.

6. On March 2, my beloved Granny (no really - she's the world's greatest Granny) had hip replacement surgery. She had the other hip done about 15 years ago. After that surgery, she developed a blood clot and had to stay in the hospital for weeeeeeeeks. This time, though, everything went very well and she's already been home for several days now.

7. My mom's side of the family is quite musical. Most of us sing, and many of us (but not me) play at least one instrument. I grew up singing in children's choir at church and then went on to audition for and perform in my high school's concert choir. Now, our high school didn't have the best athletics and our football program always sucked, but our marching band and concert choir were at least state-renowned. Anyway, I haven't been part of a choir in a long time. For the past month or two, though, I've noticed that during hymns at church, the choir director is noticing me. Eventually he introduced himself after church one day and said that he could tell I sing (whatever that means - is everyone else not even moving their lips? I don't know.) He originally asked me to join the choir over a month ago, and I really intended to being going to Wed night practice, but for about 4 Wednesdays in a row, I swear, we were either having tornadoes or I got stuck in terrible traffice (my commute is pretty bad now). But last Wed, I finally went to practice, and I really enjoyed it! Yes, it was hard to rush home, rush to get dinner on the table, and rush out the door, but it was lots of fun, and I figure these things will be a lot harder when we have children, so I better live it up now. Anyway, it was a good release.

8. I received the starter for some Amish friendship bread several days ago, and it finally came time to bake it last Sunday night. It was pretty freaking delicious, and instead of giving away any of the starter this time, I kept all 4 portions, which makes two loaves each. I plan on making friends with the neighbors, finally, and letting Z butter up some coworkers. Eventually I'll have to kill the starter, though, because it multiplies and I don't have time to bake tons of bread all the time, even though it is amazing.

9. This past weekend, my great friend and her family hosted their annual spring-time get together - their Daffodil Party. It's an evening in their beautifully landscaped gardens visiting with old friends and celebrating spring's arrival. It's pretty wonderful.

10. We finally bought a lawnmower last week. Sat morning, before we left for the party, Z mowed the lawn for the first time as a homeowner.

11. I stayed home "sick" today. I didn't feel quite so bad as I just didn't feel too good. And I'm freaking exhausted (see #2 for explanation), so I looked at it as a mental health day, necessary for me to remain a good employee. It turns out, I'm even more appreciated than I thought. Even though my manager has told me that he is working with HR to make me a real employee, I was still surprised that he called me this morning after learning that I was home sick. He said that he panicked and had to cancel meetings that I was to head up because I've done such a good job in taking over the responsibilities that he has no idea how to cover for me. He told me how necessary I am and that he called HR and told them to fast track the process! That made me feel pretty great.

Roses!

2009-02-24T19:39:00.001-06:00

We created a gorgeous rose garden this weekend with the most beautiful Italian-stained birdbath every created!

No Time for a Breather

2009-02-16T10:49:00.002-06:00

We have been so crazy busy lately - but in a really good way. This weekend we travelled to Knoxville, TN for our friend's wedding. It was great seeing her pledge her life to the man she loves, but it was one heck of a drive - our whole trip was right at 14 hours, and the wedding and reception combined was less than 2 hours of that... That's a really long day!

Yesterday, Sunday, we got the yard leveled out in the area where we're getting our storage building installed. We also planted some flowers and borrowed a family member's truck to go get lots of lumber for our next project - building a frame for our porch swing. We're not doing the simple A-frame. We are doing a much larger frame, and putting lattace on it to have morning glories, roses, etc., grow up it. So, it's part porch swing, part arbor.

This morning, at 7:00 (around 34 degrees) we started working on the porch swing. It's huge - I'll try to remember to post a picture when we're done. Z is at Lowe's right now getting two more pieces of lumber so we can finish.

The guys to install the storage building are here now (now it's about 47 degrees and the sun is in the yard) and they're working awfully fast - we'll probably be moving all the tools into it by night fall.

So glad this is a long weekend!

New Possibilities

2009-02-05T18:19:00.002-06:00

After I got laid off, I took the rest of that week off. Not to sulk, really, but to process my thoughts and figure out what to do. The next week I had interviews everyday except MLK Day. I met with two staffing agencies, had an interview on my own, and was sent on one by agency #2. The interview I had on my own was with a small start-up. They were looking for a marketing coordinator, but I wasn't convinced they were looking for me. Still, I thought they might offer me the job. Boy am I glad they didn't. The interview the agency sent me to was for the corporate headquarters of a large bank. I wasn't excited about it because it was a temporary job and the location was pretty far away from our house. But at the interview I found out that the job was filling in for the Senior Marketing Specialist while she's on a 3-month maternity leave. Count training before and catching her back up afterwards, and it turns into a 4 or 5 month assignment. However, I've been told by about 5 different people, including the 2 who interviewed me, that it's a growing and evolving company, and there's always the possibility that they'd keep me on after she comes back. So I don't feel that I'll be let go. Of course I could - that's the official deal, but I'm feeling positive and treating this like a 4 month interview. So far I feel like I've impressed people and done a good job.

This is my second week, and so far I really like it. I've been training, of course, which makes you feel stupid and annoying for asking so many questions. I'm in charge of local and regional marketing for all of our regions (5 states), along with all of our grand openings of new branches. It's really fast-paced, which is what I love. I've learned a lot. I think my favorite part of this new job is the level of professionalism. Everyone wears a suit just about every day, everyone respects each other's personal space and privacy, and everyone seems really intelligent, but not snobby. So far I haven't met any office weirdos or even rude people. All my coworkers have been the appropriate amount of friendly, I get along with them, and I think they seem to like me.

All around, I feel like this was a really good thing for me. I didn't fit in at the old place, and I was really bored. Here, the days fly by and I feel challenged, as well as needed.

Now if only it would become permanent...

Boy Do I Feel Better

2009-01-20T11:51:00.003-06:00

I have just returned from an appointment with the first "placement agency" I contacted. This one was in Prattvegas. I'd heard positive things about them from some Sunday School members, so I decided to give it a whirl, even though I hated the temp agencies in Tuscaloosa.

It was a pain, of course. You must fill out your entire work history, even though you bring a resume. You sign a million papers and consent forms, and I had to provide 7 years' worth of residences for a background check. After filling out the application (that really took me about 30 minutes) a woman came in to "interview" me. She asked what I was looking for and what my minimum accepted pay would be. Then she informed me there's nothing now, but if I call every week to say I'm still interested, they'll keep me on the "professional list." (There's also an "industry list.")

But that isn't the exciting part. Yesterday morning a friend from Sunday School called me to say her coworker's husband is the president of a local company that creates Web sites for people and other businesses. They've created a social networking site and need someone to help market it as well as write copy for their other sites. Uh, hello, perfect! So I sent her my resume, she forwarded it on to the coworker's husband, and I waited. Last night we were at Wal-Mart killing time during an oil change, and we apparently lost cell phone signal, because later I saw I had a missed call. The area code was Montgomery, and I got excited. However, there was no voicemail, so I called the number back. It was 5:15. I got an answering machine, but it was the company I'd send my resume to! So I got to wondering why the man hadn't left a message for me. Then it hit me - on Saturday I'd driven home to get on my mother's family plan and drop my own phone plan to save some money. Since I was switching providers, I had to get a new phone. Same number, but different phone. I HADN'T SET UP MY NEW VOICEMAIL!

Thankfully, once I got home I saw that he'd emailed me saying he thought I'd be a good fit for this new position, and he'd try to meet with me as soon as possible! Hooray!

Tomorrow I meet with another agency, this time in Montgomery. This is the office that my previous employers went through anytime they needed to find a new employee (except me, who was hired the good old-fashioned way.) So my old boss actually called them on my behalf and put in a good word for me. Afterwards, the president emailed me to say he looked forward to meeting with me and would see what he could find for me.

So even though I don't have a job yet, I'm not feeling hopeless at all. I'm actually feeling quite positive.

Also, today we found out that Z's cousin is expecting a baby about 8 months from now. What a good day.

"I've Got Some Bad News For You"

2009-01-17T20:28:00.003-06:00

That's what my boss told me Wednesday afternoon about a second a half before she said, "We're gonna have to let you go."

That's right, folks. I was laid off.

Sure, I knew times were tough, and I had definitely noticed all the closed-door meetings lately, but I still felt like I'd been slapped in the face. I mean, I've never been laid off before, or fired in any other way. Of course I cried. I cried like a baby. My friend cried too - we were fired together. Isn't that sweet? Just another unprofessional act from my unprofessional boss. She called us both into her office around 4:00 that afternoon. She laid it on thick too - claiming she'd been crying for days and hadn't slept and was so upset. Wow, that sure makes me feel better. She assured me that she did remember that I'd just bought a house, and she's sorry about that.

This came right on the heels of my office cancelling health insurance (thank goodness I'm on Z's plan) and drastically cutting costs in other ways. The expo I'd been working on for the past six months was cancelled the week before, without anyone telling me. If I'd known that, I would have been prepared, but they kept that a secret, letting me continue calling prospective exhibitors, begging them to sign up and pay a deposit.

We came out of her office about 30 minutes later, tear stained and confused. It just all happened so fast. She gave us our final checks and our W-2s, saying she'd pay us one more paycheck and good luck. We went to my cubicle where our co-worker was waiting for us. She's an older (68) lady who was very upset that we both got canned - we were the only people sitting in her department and we'd become friends. She cried with us quite a bit until we were interrupted.

Our boss had come back over to remind us that if we knew of anyone needing the services of the company, please, please, please send them her way. Uh, excuse me, what? Why in the hell would I take the time to usher business to you after you fired me not 5 minutes ago? I swear, that woman is so dense.

By this point it was almost 5:00, and although she told us we could come back the next day to gather our things, I knew I didn't want to return. I hated the job when I had it; I certainly didn't want to go to work after I'd been let go! So I took the time to pack up my pictures, personal office supplies, etc., as well as delete my files from the computer. It took quite a while, so I was about 45 minutes late coming home. Well, since I hated my job, I have never stayed late - not once. I always arrive home by 5:15, so Z was getting concerned. Then I walked in with my face all red and blotchy and he was much more concerned.

After discussing everything, though, we've decided this is really a blessing in disguise. I hated, I mean really hated that job and the office and the work and everything about it, and there's no way I could have quit before lining up another job. However, it's extremely difficult to find a job when you're working 40 hours a week at an office with no privacy. So even though I'm concerned about money (who the hell wouldn't be?) I'm confident that I'll find a place to work that is better (what could be worse?) and maybe - gasp - fulfilling.

I took Thursday completely off, meeting my sister for lunch and taking it easy around the house, letting my semi-scary situation sink in (and, let's be honest, feeling miserable. It was also the 2nd anniversary of my dad's death and I'd planned on taking the day off anyway). Friday I worked on my resume and set up appointments with two different placement agencies, after searching crappy job postings all day long.

Today I got a new haircut and got my wedding rings cleaned - I'm ready to conquer the world.

Take that, HB.

Clarification

2009-01-06T17:18:00.001-06:00

So, I know in my "resolutions" post the other day I mentioned being healthier in 2009. Of course that's a crock of crap and I just plain old want to lose weight. I don't know too many women who don't, so I get that this isn't a unique desire. Once upon a time I felt like I looked good. I thought that I had a nice ass, great boobs, and a decent waist. Now I don't feel so good about myself. I've had lots of stressful times in the past couple of years (long-distance relationship, college graduation, death of my father, unemployment, wedding planning, moving, more unemployment), and during each situation I took worse care of myself and gained a little more weight. My main concern though isn't going to the beach next summer, or what my husband thinks of me, or even stepping on the scale because I don't do that anyway unless I'm at the doctor's office. My main concern is pregnancy. I don't plan (key word: plan) on getting pregnant for another few years, but I absolutely must be in shape for pregnancy. The thought of being one of those fatty pregnant women makes me sick. My good friend Jessica had a baby last year and looked phenomenal through her whole pregnancy. She was one of those girls that if you saw her from behind, you couldn't even tell she was pregnant. On the other hand, I also knew a woman that I just thought was very large. It took someone telling me she was 8 months pregnant for me to even notice the baby. She just had gross rolls all over her. Those are two extremes that most women don't experience, I realize, but still, I want to be a beautiful pregnant woman.

Last summer, Z and I joined the Prattvegas YMCA. It has served its purpose. We have a home gym, but our spare room apparently wasn't insulated and we couldn't use it. So we went to the gym where we could work out in the comfort of air conditioning. But now that we've moved, it takes almost 30 minutes to drive there, and also the monthly fee has gone up a little in the new year. So we are quitting the gym (I'm reminded of a Friends episode) and switching to a combination of using our home gym (which is now conveniently located in a beautiful new home with working A/C) and walking in our neighborhood (we've never lived in a neighborhood before, so walking without the indoor treadmill was dangerous and unlikely). Perhaps I will become svelte, who knows?

Glorious Weekend

2009-01-05T17:19:00.000-06:00

I had such a great weekend. Our holidays were so hectic that I really hadn't felt rested or relaxed in a long time, even though with the holidays came a few days off work. Friday night was still a little crazy – I'd made a lasagna the night before for brand new parents in my Sunday School class, and we'd invited a college friend over to watch football and hang out. So I get off work, go straight home, get the lasagna, and drive into Prattvegas to deliver it. This would normally be no more than a 15 minute drive, but at rush hour Prattvegas becomes the 7th circle of hell. And then I discover that I'd been given the wrong address. So, my lasagna was a little late, and I didn't get back to my house to start getting dinner ready for Z and our guest until about 7:00. Anyway, that visit was very nice, even though I fell asleep during the football game.

Saturday morning we didn't sleep in too much (sleeping past 8:00 makes me feel like a bum), but we woke up slowly which is more important. I got a lot of great books for Christmas, so I read Saturday morning, and we spent a lot of time in the yard (it was strangely warm) measuring for our fence and digging up someone's long-forgotten pole which had been cemented into a bucket and the whole shebang buried. I'm not sure what it was used for, but we dug it up and generally just cleaned up the yard. The neighbors seem to view our side of their fence as a dumping ground of little items. It's like they think if we can't see it from our house it isn't littering. So I go outside and pick up Big Mac boxes, gum wrappers, etc. Also, this weekend I found a few butter knives, two pieces of pipe, and a pair of scissors. All in one corner of our yard… This is weird because nobody has lived on our property. The house was just built last summer, and it was a wooded lot before that. It makes me think that Damien threw them (at us? at animals?) or something. I don't know what to think about all that.

Saturday afternoon a storm blew in and we sat on the porch watching it rain and just enjoyed nature. Since both us were raised in the country, this is natural to us. The apartments were definitely not natural. People shouldn't be shut up like that.

Anyway, Sunday we went to church as normal, then went home to get ready for my mom, step dad, and brother's visit. They hadn't seen our house since about a week before we moved in, so we had them over for lunch. The menu was parmesan oven-fried chicken, fresh green beans, cinnamon apples, mashed potatoes, sour cream muffins, and key lime pie for dessert (my mother made that). I only have two hands, and this took a lot of prep. (The chicken alone had 30 minutes prep and an hour cook time.) So when my mother arrived she helped me get lunch ready. It's been a long time since my mother and I cooked together, so that was lots of fun. The meal was a big hit too, even though it was almost 2:00 before we ate.

They stayed for a few hours and hung out with us on the porch, admiring our new house (it does look quite different from the last time they saw it), and just visiting. After they left around 5:00, Z and I went to Books-a-Million to return several duplicated books I'd gotten for Christmas and get a couple of new ones with our store credit. Then we went home for a quiet evening of reading. How very quaint. It was a splendid weekend, all around, and I hated to ruin it by coming to work this morning.

P.S. At nighttime we always set the security system for the doors and windows, but never the motion detectors, because of course we're still in the house. Last night Z was either playing a practical joke or being forgetful, I'm not sure, but around 12:30 a.m. when I got out of bed to get a glass of water, I walked through the living room and the alarm started shrieking at me. It took us a while to get back to sleep after that little episode.

So This is the New Year

2009-01-02T17:24:00.000-06:00

"So this is the new year." That's one of my favorite lines from one of my favorite groups, Death Cab. I'm not a big fan of New Year's Eve or Day. I just don't really get what the big deal is or what exactly we're celebrating – the passage of time? Sure it's fun to remember all the highlights of the year and talk about hopes for the upcoming year. That's what Z and I did while we drove 3.5 hours to "celebrate" NYE at our friends' apartment in Huntsville. We thought about the good times in our families – a new baby, a new marriage, engagement, new houses, new jobs, our first anniversary; and we also remembered the trying times – the financial difficulty of the summer, breakups of friends, moving away. We then talked about the things we'd love for '09 to bring – a job to our friend who's been looking since he graduated law school with Z in May, a happy marriage to our friend Candace, a puppy for us, a great job for my sister when she graduates, etc. Those are some lofty hopes, to be sure, but if you can't hope on New Year's Eve, when can you?

I am not usually a resolution maker, but this year there are some specific things I'd like to get better about. I'm going to be healthier in '09, read more, bloom where I'm planted, make more friends here in Prattvegas, dwell less on the negative. What are your goals for 2009?

Even though NYE wasn't as much fun as I thought it would be (approximately 7 hours of driving and an allergy attack) and it caused me to spend more than half of my off-day in the car, I suppose it is a little exciting to think of the opportunities a new year brings. You can put the bad parts of '08 behind you and leave them in the past. Even though it sucks that the summer with no income really screwed up our finances and we still haven't recovered, we have devised a new financial plan for '09 and in '10 we are declaring war on the law school student loan.

It feels good to have a plan and know that anything's possible in the new year, even though I still think it's a silly holiday and doesn't in any way compare to Christmas, Easter, or other holidays with a purpose. I'm just saying.

Merry Christmas!

2008-12-23T17:29:00.001-06:00

I have been unbelievably busy the last couple of weeks, but before Christmas gets here I wanted to go ahead and catch everyone up on the goings on in Prattvegas. OK, so technically we don't live in Prattvegas anymore. But it's so much more fun than saying Millvegas. That sounds dumb and I refuse to do it. So Prattvegas it is.

Two weekends ago we decorated the house for Christmas then had our friend Candace over to visit, along with her new fiancé. We had a good time hanging out, then Z and I went to Birmingham for a wedding. The groom went to law school with Z, and all four of us are good friends now. It was a beautiful wedding, and a fun reception.

Last week my company was full of Christmas activity – each day a department brought food for the rest of the company (we actually did that the week before last too. They call it the 12 Days of Eating), and it all culminated in our Christmas party on Friday. We played Dirty Santa, had a big meal, I read the annual Christmas poem I'd written (and my boss heeeeeeeeeeeavily edited/butchered.) It was fine. There aren't really any other words for it. It wasn't terrible.

Saturday was Christmas at my paternal grandmother's house. She's never really been a cuddly grandmother. I mean, I have my Granny, and then I have my other grandmother. I love her, but we've never been close. When my dad got sick, he moved in with her and she took care of him. After he passed away she got very angry with me and my siblings and accused us of silly things that essentially meant, "They didn't love him or care about him." You can imagine how hurtful that was, and many unkind words were exchanged, especially when it was time to probate my father's will and follow his instructions. She did not like that "the kids" were getting all of his antiques because she wanted to sell them. It was a very hurtful time. So, I still love her, but things have never been the same, and I wasn't exactly looking forward to going. But, it was a very nice afternoon. My aunt and uncle (brother to my dad) live in Montgomery, and they picked us up so that we didn't have to drive, which was terrific. Also, we never visit with them (I don't know why – that side of the family just doesn't cherish togetherness like my mom's side), so it was good to spend several hours in the car catching up. My uncle reminds me of my dad before it got bad, which makes me both sad and happy to be around him.

Sunday we went to church as usual, but that night Z had a Christmas surprise for me. He'd told me not to schedule anything for that evening, and at lunch time he finally told me what it was – he'd gotten us tickets for "A Christmas Carol – The Musical" at the Alabama Shakespeare Festival. If you haven't been there and you're relatively close, you should definitely go – it's beautiful! When I was in the 11th grade, I went there for bonus points in my English class, and somehow I wound up going with my dad, grandmother, and uncle (re-read the paragraph above – what a weird situation. Especially for high school me.) Anyway, even though I'd been to the Festival before, and toured the museum and gardens, I'd never been inside the theater or seen a play there before. Magnificent. The show was really breathtaking. The set was gorgeous, the orchestra was phenomenal, and the actors were unbelievably talented. The voices on those children – tremendous. Not only was I incredibly impressed that my ultimate fighting- and football-loving husband bought us tickets to a musical for Christmas (he loved it!), but I so enjoyed the play that I was nearly in tears the whole time. I will definitely go back. Too bad they had to cancel next year's production of Les Miserables due to budget cuts…

Yesterday (Monday) I called in sick because I had an interview with the Alabama Medicaid Agency that afternoon and didn't want to come up with an excuse to leave work early. It went OK, I suppose, but not great. I don't feel too confident about it, but it's hard to feel confident when you know they're meeting with approximately 20 applicants similar to you… I'd have to sing and dance to stand out.

My bosses, bless their hearts, announced this morning that they're closing the office tomorrow, Christmas Eve. Originally, we were scheduled to work all day, with the hope that if the "bad cop" boss left early, then we could too, but if he stayed, we wouldn't be allowed to leave early at all. I don't like working like that – I want to know what's going on so I can make plans. And we're supposed to be at Z's parents' house (a good 2 hours away when it is NOT rush hour) for dinner time. So, that is a huge deal for me! So we have Christmas Eve with my in-laws, Christmas morning just the two of us at home, Christmas dinner with my Granny and my mom's side of the family, and the day after Christmas at my mom's house with my immediate family. Z can't go to that one though because he has to work that day. Tell me what sense it makes to have your employees come in for Friday alone. I think that's stupid.

I have been finished with all of my Christmas shopping for some time now, but there is still one item that hasn't been delivered yet. I don't think it will get here until Christmas Eve (tomorrow), which makes me anxious, but if it doesn't arrive in time, I'll wrap and give my sister-in-law a picture of her gift!

Wishing you all a merry and delightful Christmas!

So Sensitive

2008-12-15T12:08:00.002-06:00

I am at home for lunch with my feelings hurt. That's nothing new. For the past several months, probably, I have been so sensitive I'm even irritating myself. The smallest thing will either make me cry or make me want to lash out. This morning at work I have had poetry critiqued by ignorant people and had to make extensive travel arrangements for one of the editors. Now, if I'd signed on as a personal assistant, maybe this stuff wouldn't bother me, but since I'm the director of marketing, I find it stupid. Anyway, that's not really the problem. It's a compound problem of course, and this morning it was kind of just the last straw.

Trying to make myself feel better, I forced Z to let me get our Christmas tree Friday night even though he had a brief to write which took all weekend. So I decorated it 100% by myself. Again. After he graduated law school I thought I wouldn't have to do things like that by myself anymore. See what I mean? Way too sensitive. He didn't want to get the tree already because he knew he wouldn't have time to do it. But I get depressed if it's Christmas time and I haven't decorated yet. Sigh.

My mind is just going a million different directions today. I'm anxious because I got another job lead with a different state department, but I'm upset because I never heard anything back about the Dept. of Education. I'm mad at my work situation and mad that I'm such a wussy that I just take it. I'm feeling too far removed from my family and friends. I mainly feel trapped at work. I hate it. But my lunch hour is back and I have to leave.

It's been forever...

2008-12-09T17:32:00.000-06:00

We are getting a puppy! My work friend's cousin has a chocolate lab that will be having puppies in the next few weeks. When they are ready to leave their mom in early spring, we are getting one, and we're so excited about it! We don't have our backyard fenced yet, but we will by then (although, as my mother points out, labs chew on everything, so maybe we shouldn't get a fence at all and it would chew the neighbor's trouble-maker kid!) Even though two chocolate lab parents can have yellow lab puppies, I'm hoping we get a chocolate lab because I think they're the cutest ones. I think Z would rather have yellow though. We could get one of each and they'd look like my birthday cake when they snuggled! (Yellow cake, chocolate icing – get it? Forgive me, I'm going puppy crazy.)

Christmas will be here before you know it, and we haven't started decorating the house at all yet. This is not necessarily my preference, but since we always get a live tree, I do still want the tree to be full and beautiful when Christmas morning gets here, not naked. I've gotten a good start on my Christmas shopping, but I'm nowhere near done yet. Cooking is one thing I've tackled head on though – it seems like every other day I'm making some new Christmas goodie. (Well, it seems that way ever since Thanksgiving, actually.) Chex mix, sausage balls, chocolate chip cookies, peanut butter pie, chocolate trifle, it's been practically non-stop. I love it though. Last night I tried my work friend's recipe for poppy seed chicken casserole, and it was delicious, in my humble opinion. (Same friend with the puppy connection. I'm actually making friends…)

At work, Christmas is definitely in the air. We've had our official "decorate the office" day, and we've just begun our "Twelve Days of Eating." Apparently they do Christmas big here. I see it as overkill, because I don't necessarily like celebrating the holiest season of the year at work. If you truly want your employees to celebrate, don't make them work Christmas Eve! (Boy do I envy school teachers during the holidays. Seriously, if I had kids I would be so mad about working on Christmas Eve.)

Tomorrow we are having a security system installed at the lake house. It'll help our insurance costs, help me feel better when we're gone all day, and help me sleep better on nights when Z is out of town (which is pretty often now. He travels all over the state for court.) Also, with the promotion they were running, we got lots of incentives, and that helps too. And once that's up, we can finally get our tree! We didn't want to have any gifts under the Christmas tree without having our security system installed.

Thanksgiving

2008-11-26T15:21:00.001-06:00

I love, love, love Thanksgiving. Tomorrow morning we're leaving bright and early for my family reunion in Tennessee. Unfortunately, as many of you already know, my grandparents won't be joining us this year. My grandfather fell down Monday night on his slick porch and hit his head. In doing so, he got a gash in his head that needed stitches, and he also cracked his vertebrae, which led to surgery yesterday afternoon. The surgery went well, but he is recovering, and will be for several weeks. Thanksgiving won't be the same.

Happy turkey day to you all!

Vandalism at the Lake House

2008-11-24T17:18:00.002-06:00

You heard right, folks. Our porch and backyard were vandalized Friday night/Saturday morning. My brand new beautiful backyard was trashed, and worst of all, we think the neighbor's kid did it.

We woke up Saturday morning with the intentions of raking the yard and cleaning house. Z went out the back door onto the porch, then immediately called for me to come outside also. I got my robe on and went outside in the freezing cold. I couldn't believe my eyes. Everything from our porch – a chair, bench, wooden porch swing, long rug we'd used for moving, cooler/radio, step ladder, and a ton of other stuff I can't think of right now – had been tossed off the porch, knocked over, scattered all across the backyard. Our large gas grill had been dragged into the side yard then knocked upside down with the propane tank ripped off. Two rakes and a box full of grill tools (spatulas, etc) were gone (although we didn't realize this at the time). We checked our cars, which up until this weekend we'd been leaving unlocked at the house. They were fine and everything was still in them.

I was in shock, but then I got really mad. We haven't been rude to anyone, we haven't left trash sitting out, we don't have any animals that bother the neighbors, we don't play loud music. I just didn't get it. I went inside to take a shower while Z called the police. It's a really small city, so before I was even out of the shower and dressed, the policeman had come and gone. He thought the same thing Z and I thought: since nothing large was stolen (like the brand new step ladder) it was probably just neighborhood kids acting stupid.

Well that's not good enough for me. Z and I were raised to be responsible for our actions, and either one of us would have been punished for doing something like that to a neighbor's yard. So we decided we would go around to the neighbors' houses and introduce ourselves, explain what happened, and ask if they saw or heard anything last night. As soon as the police officer mentioned neighborhood kids, though, I had a really sad thought – our neighborhood is mostly full of retired people. The only "kids" that aren't small children live directly behind us. It's a family renting the home, and we didn't know anything about them. Any time we'd seen them, they didn't really seem interested in speaking to us or welcoming us to the neighborhood. They wouldn't even return my wave when I passed them in my car. But I'd seen them often, and knew there was a mom, dad, a boy who looked about 3, a boy who looked about 12, and another who was possibly 18. (I don't know who exactly the smallest child belongs to. He might be a grandson.) Anyway, we'd never met any of them, and we thought maybe we should pay them a visit.

Meanwhile, the whole time we'd been walking around in the yard, getting upset, showing the police officer everything, and cleaning up the yard, the middle kid from next door was in his yard half-way watching us. He took turns shooting hoops and lounging on top of his father's pickup truck. (Keep in mind it was about 45 degrees that morning.) We thought we'd gotten everything picked up, and then I noticed that our two rakes, which had been leaning against one of our trees, were missing. Since nothing else seemed to be missing, I assumed they'd been carried off somewhere, possibly tossed into the lake. Considering we just bought a nice rake, that made me pretty mad. Then something caught my eye. Our box full of grill tools was on the other side of the fence – the neighbors' side. That was it. I yelled to Z what I'd found. We weren't going to just walk into their yard to get it, because we didn't know these people and didn't want to assume they would be reasonable. A few minutes later Z notices the two rakes flat in their tall grass, almost totally hidden. I was completely pissed. The kid was back inside by this point, and we head over to ring the doorbell and talk to his parents.

He meets us at the front door with a grunt. This kid is dressed like a thug and speaks like one too. His whole demeanor said What do you want? You're not coming in my house. Z asked if his dad was at home. We got a "Naw" in return. We glanced at both vehicles sitting in the driveway and said that we just wanted to introduce ourselves, but we'd come back later.

We sat down on our back porch, which faces the side of their house and yard. There was no way we were going to let him take our things and hide them before we got the chance to talk to his parents. The boy came back outside on his cell phone and walked up and down his driveway, which runs down the side of our house and yard, saying very loudly into his phone that his parents were gone until Tuesday and he had to go to basketball practice in a little while. I highly doubt he was actually on the phone with anybody. I think he was just trying to let us know that we should just give up and leave him alone. It was freezing outside, so after about 20 minutes we went in to eat some lunch, but we stayed at the windows and never took our eyes off our stuff in his yard. The boy started playing basketball, and our things were in plain view of him. I know he could see them, but he couldn't move them because he could see us watching. The whole thing was so silly, but we didn't want to talk to him without his parents and have him simply claim he didn't know anything.

After lunch, there were still no adults around, so Z finally decided that he wanted to rake the yard, dammit, so he went marching over to talk to the kid. He immediately saw Z and met him at the fence (I'm telling you, he was acting very defensive). Z asked again if his parents were home, and when the kid said no, Z told him the mess we'd found that morning. Then he asked why our stuff was in their yard. The kid didn't even try to look surprised, he just said he didn't know and walked over to pick up the two rakes and the box, then he handed them over the fence to Z.

Then he launched into an elaborate story about how that had happened to their yard a while back, and he thought it was a man "up the road near the car wash" that didn't like him. Then he said that same man had broken his dad's truck window with a rock and blamed it on the kid. Then he changed his story and said he thought it was a kid down the road. He said he wouldn't have that kid over to play anymore and he was also going to "tell his mom." Give me a break.

So we figure, OK, he's a liar, but he seems sort of harmless, and at least none of our stuff was broken. We'll just talk to his parents when they get home. We start raking the yard and a different neighbor walks over to meet us and chat. He's the husband of a nice lady who had also already come over to greet me a few weeks ago while I was painting one night. He and Z started talking about what happened, and he seemed pretty surprised. He admitted that the kid had some problems (we learned he goes to an alternative school, does badly in school, and his family moved from Montgomery because he was getting into too much trouble), but he had never done anything like that before.

Right about then, the boy's parents both walk out of the house, get in their two vehicles, and drive away. The little kid (Mike) was in the truck with his dad. Z and I, along with the nice neighbor (Harold) all waved at them as they drove by. None of them even looked at us. So of course, Z and I look at each other and say, "I thought his parents were gone until Tuesday." So that confirms that he's a liar, whether he's the one who trashed our porch and yard or not. And he clearly has something to hide. So Z says, "Well, I guess his dad's taking him to basketball practice. When they come back, I'll just go over and introduce myself and explain what happened." The neighbor told us the dad's a night manager at Wal-Mart and the mother is the manager of Dollar General. The pieces were coming together for me. He has parents who work full time at strange hours, a cute 3-year-old in the house, and he has school troubles. Sounds like he's starving for attention to me.

The dad returned about 30 minutes later, and Z put down the rake to go speak to him. He practically ran into his house when he noticed Z walking toward their yard. Then he got back in his truck and drove off a few moments later. What the crap? So we still haven't spoken to his parents…

That afternoon we went into the city to buy blinds/curtains for our back door and kitchen door. We were going to do that eventually anyway, but by that point we felt like it was imperative. The whole ordeal makes me think the fence we thought we couldn't afford is higher on the priority list now, as well as the security system we were putting off. And instead of getting a cute puppy, maybe we should just get a man eating dog…

Sunday afternoon, after church (and my baptism – another post for another day), we watched Mike as he used loppers about as big as himself to chop down all the muscadine vines on his fence (they're renters, remember?), then turned the loppers onto the lower branches of a couple of fruit trees. When he couldn't reach anymore, he got a step ladder and started chopping down larger branches high over his head. He looked like an accident waiting to happen. About 2 hours went by with no adult checking on him, and he nearly cut down the whole tree. Then he proceeded to drag all the limbs and clippings and heave them over the fence. Then he glanced up at our windows and walked away. Their fence is crooked though, and it's not truly an indicator of their property line. So, he didn't really drop them on our property, but he clearly meant to. Uh, are we living by Damien?

Harold told us something else that bothered me. He said that Mike occasionally comes over to their house to ask to use things. Don't get me wrong – I'm neighborly, and I'll give a cup of sugar, but that's not what I'm talking about. He said that Mike would come over in the middle of the night (where were his parents?) to ask to use the phone, saying their house phone was cut off. (Remember, I said he was using a cell phone this weekend. So… why would he need the neighbors' phone? And who does he need to call in the middle of the night anyway?) Harold also told us that he didn't know anything about the dad's truck window being broken out. (Do you know any retired men who are still young enough to be in their yards often? If so, then you know that they know everything about their neighbors. They see and know all. I believe if the truck window had really been broken out, Harold would have known about it.) He also said Mike sometimes comes over and asks for gasoline for their weed eater. That's an expensive favor, and what kind of able-bodied man would have his maybe-12-year-old son bothering the neighbors about gasoline for the weed eater? We're in town. Gas is walking distance away. (For that matter, they have two nice vehicles. We're not talking about a poor boy who has no parents.) I am generally a positive person, but it seems to me that if you've got a troubled kid coming over to your house at all times, he might be checking out what's inside of it. Or trying to learn when you're home and when you're not (or maybe just when the man isn't home). Or who knows what. After talking to this kid, he truly doesn't seem like he can be trusted. It honestly gives me hesitations about getting a puppy or kitten. If he can come onto our porch in the middle of the night and steal and ransack, is he violent? I have no idea. After watching how destructive he was Sunday afternoon, I truly dread Christmas break when he's at home, bored, all day. Heaven help us. And the remaining fruit trees.

We're Home!

2008-11-17T17:36:00.002-06:00

I had a long, exciting weekend, but I was almost completely unable to enjoy it. Thursday night my sneezing and sniffling morphed into a full-blown head cold complete with unstoppable sneezing, insane sinus pressure to the point I thought I would throw up, and the total inability to breathe peacefully. In a word, I was miserable. But Z's parents were coming over to move furniture on Saturday, so Thursday and Friday were our last days to prepare. (Our goal was to get every single item out of the apartment that we could carry ourselves – including dresser drawers – because sometimes they can be a little difficult, and we wanted their part of the move to be as quick and painless as possible.) Thursday night we tried to move our office. We have a rather large computer desk that has to be taken apart. It has six large drawers, a six-foot long top, and two columns that are very unstable once the top is removed. So we knew we needed to move that ourselves, along with the computer which is still less than a year old. Even though they're family, sometimes other people just aren't as careful as you'd like them to be with your belongings.

Anyway, Z injured himself several times throughout Thursday evening, and I was so sick that I was literally praying to God to "just take me now." Needless to say, it was a long night, and I finally decided (around 10:30 when my cold medicine finally kicked in and I could think straight) that I would call in sick Friday to prepare for Saturday by (1) recuperating a little and (2) moving items to the house. I knew I wouldn't totally be out of commission like with the flu, but that I couldn't go to work sounding/looking/feeling like I did. So I might as well be personally productive.

So Friday I packed and took 3 carloads of boxes/clothes/lamps/dresser drawers, etc. to the house while Z was at work. I had a fever and felt horrible, and it was an unusually warm and muggy day, but I knew that the more I did then, the less I'd have to do with Z's parents. After Z came home from work, the two of us made about 3 more trips. That night (our last night as apartment dwellers!) we further prepared for his parents' early arrival: we took apart as much furniture as possible, including the bed and we slept on the mattress directly on the floor. They showed up bright and early Saturday morning with biscuits (if only I had an appetite – still sick). We began the move with the behemoth: Z's weight machine. He had already completely disassembled the thing that morning, but it still took two full hours for us all to load it on the trailer, drive it to the house (10 minutes max), move it in, and re-assemble it. It's a beast and I hate it. Once that was over with, we made one more trip before stopping for lunch at Steak and Shake. After lunch, we returned to the apartment for our last trip of the day and went back to the house to finish up the move. After just one minor accident (while putting the bed together, the footboard collapsed onto the bed railings and cracked one of them completely and scratched up my beautiful sleigh bed) we were totally finished with all the furniture. It was 4:00 and we had moved a weight machine, couch, recliner, wing-back chair, three coffee tables, washer, dryer, queen-sized bed, mattress and box springs, chest of drawers, dresser, nightstand, large TV, entertainment system to hold said TV, large gas grill, porch swing, writing desk and chair. Quite a feat. I'm very glad we had already moved all of our possessions as well as some furniture (kitchen table and all chairs, computer desk, etc.) What a day.

We all collapsed onto the couches, but then I realized what time it was. Z and I had to leave to go to Hoover for my grandmother's and cousin's joint birthday party that night. We were a little bit late, and my cold was transforming into a horrible cough instead of an annoying sneeze. This made me sad because another cousin was going to be there with her baby who I rarely see (they live farther away than anyone else), and I didn't want to make her sick.

We had a fun time there but got home (our real home!) around 1:00 Sunday morning. We did try to make it to church that morning, but we wound up leaving after Sunday School because neither of us could keep our eyes open, and I felt very rude for yawning all through class. I knew we'd probably fall asleep during the sermon. So we went home for a nap. Well, Z napped but I had a coughing fit and couldn't sleep. I went to the grocery store that afternoon for a huge shopping trip (I hadn't cooked a meal in more than two weeks) and cooked chili for dinner. We went to the apartment for about 20 minutes to get the rest of the stuff from the fridge and pick up a little. We'll have to return to clean it, but then we'll be finished with that place!

This morning it was pretty awesome to wake up and have a cup of coffee looking out at the lake covered in fog. Pretty awesome indeed.

*Oh yeah, our builder totally fixed the dishwasher last week. The little tube connecting to the disposal had a plastic covering that the installer had forgotten to punch out. So he fixed it. He's pretty cool.

Anniversary and Veterans Day

2008-11-11T18:31:00.000-06:00

Last night, after Z gave me a dozen beautiful red roses, we went to dinner at a great seafood restaurant. We'd never been to it before, but it was phenomenal. The place was nice, the bread was good, my tilapia was excellent, and then we ordered crème brûlée, which was also really great. All in all it was a very nice evening.

Today Z is off work for Veteran's Day, so he has scheduled for the cable company to hook us up with cable and internet. He spent the day at the new house waiting for them, and tonight he is leaving for Wednesday morning court. He is also handling our dishwasher situation. We ran the dishwasher the other day and discovered that it is not draining properly, so Z called the builder today to get the name of the plumber who installed it. The builder will be coming over this afternoon or this evening to check it out though, because he said that it was inspected. Probably he has installed that model in lots of homes (I can imagine he has his favorite appliances that he usually picks), so maybe he'll immediately recognize the problem. Also, since the refrigerator installation guy told us to throw out our first two gallons of water and first two loads of ice from the fridge due to dust and drywall in the water line, it only makes sense that perhaps that same dust and drywall didn't get cleared from the dishwasher's water line. But I sure as heck don't know how to go about doing that. Anyway, since our builder is about the nicest guy around, I'm sure he'll take care of it.

First Anniversary

2008-11-10T17:22:00.001-06:00

Today is our first anniversary. It's hard to believe that we've been married an entire year already. Sometimes it feels like that was just yesterday, but then I remember that we've already lived in Prattvegas for six months, and that seems strange too! It's an incredible feeling to look back at a whole year you've spent with a person and be just as happy as you were on your wedding day. I must say that when I got married I didn't know what to expect. I can't count the number of times people warned me that "the first year is the toughest." Well, I'm not sure if they meant meshing your lives is tough, or being around each other all the time is tough, or giving up your family's time for his family's time is tough. But, given everything we've been through this past year – his graduation, his job search, my quitting my job, our move here, our period of unemployment, two new jobs, the house hunt – the first year has not been "tough." It's been purely amazing. I love him more every day and sometimes I find myself simply wondering how we found one another. The J and the Z of five years ago probably would never have worked, but we met at the right time and clicked at the right time. God truly does work in mysterious ways. Tonight we have dinner reservations at a seafood restaurant which should be very nice, and hopefully it will be a wonderful, relaxing break from the half-furnished house and completely torn up apartment.

So this weekend we got tons accomplished at the new house. We fertilized the yard (with winter guard), had our beautiful fridge delivered and set up, unpacked tons of boxes, had my family over to bring me the antiques and wedding presents from their house, washed all the china and crystal, planted daffodil and tulip bulbs, did a trial run with the dishwasher and discovered it isn't draining properly, made at least 5 trips back and forth with our cars loaded down. All that, and Z had time to go fishing for about two hours! We are exhausted! Friday night we used the gift card the builder gave us to Longhorn Steakhouse and saw the police questioning a bunch of people. Even though we had to wait outside for about 30 minutes for a table, we never could figure out what was going on. In the house, we now have almost the entire kitchen, the fridge, the table and chairs. In the living room, we have a loveseat, a rocking chair from my dad, some decorations on the mantel, and the marble-topped table from my dad. In the guest bedroom we have the frame of my old canopy bed, but no box springs or mattress on it yet, and in the master bedroom, we have one antique chair from my dad. Other than that, all the furniture is still in the apartment. Z's parents are coming over this weekend to help us move that stuff. Meanwhile, our goal is to get every other item out – all our clothes, food, bathroom stuff, everything. Thankfully the house and apartment are less than 10 minutes apart.

Closing and the Rest

2008-11-03T20:59:00.001-06:00

I left work at 11:00 on Friday and went to meet Z for lunch before closing. We raced over to the attorneys' office for our appointment and spent the next two hours or so signing papers and joking around with the builder, our agent, the seller's agent, and the loan officer. The attorney must have thought we were the craziest bunch of people, because I'm guessing most people take this process more seriously than we were. We were just so relieved, and the builder was such a nice man that we were all having fun. Afterwards, the builder gave us a $50 gift card to Longhorn, our agent gave us a $40 gift card to Home Depot, and the mortgage company gave us a set of cooking utensils with their name on the handles (?). Then we went to the apartment to change clothes and regroup. We headed to the house after that to clean and prepare for painting. We washed all the windows inside and out (nose prints were everywhere!), I sort of cleaned the bathrooms (not the bathtubs yet), stuff like that. Then we headed out to Lowe's to purchase blinds, paint, and a mailbox, as well as the supplies for everything. That took two buggies and a couple of hours, but then we had to decide on our fridge. After driving around to different stores in different cities, we wound up at Lowe's again to order the first one we'd liked. It'll be delivered next Saturday. After that it was getting pretty late, but we went to the house to get ready to paint the next morning. We started taping the baseboards, ceiling, etc., and laying drop cloths. We were there until about 12:30 that night.

Saturday morning came early, but we were meeting my sister at the house to start painting the bedroom a beautiful blue. We all got started around 9:30 or so, and worked nonstop until lunchtime when we took a Zaxby's break. After that, my sister and I finished painting the bedroom while Z hung blinds for the whole house (quite a feat). Then we moved to finish taping up the kitchen. Since we have tray ceilings and a chair railing in the dining room, that's a lot of taping. My sister left around 5:00 or so, and Z and I took a dinner break. We went to the apartment for about an hour to rest and he watched the beginning of the Texas/Texas Tech game before we decided to go back to the house to paint the bottom of the dining room. We'd decided to do a darker green on the bottom and a lighter green on the top as well as the rest of the kitchen. That area was so small we decided to go ahead and knock it out Saturday night. It took about an hour and a half though to paint and clean up from the whole day, so we got home around 9:30 I think. I don't even really remember going to bed.

Sunday morning we got up early for church (8:30 is too early for Sunday School). After church we changed clothes and headed back out to start painting the rest of the kitchen with the lighter green. We knew it was going to be tricky to paint around all those cabinets and in tiny places, so we took our time and were very careful. Z had to leave to go buy a ladder at one point so he could paint above the cabinets. Around 5:30 we had to leave for a while because Z was headed to Huntsville to be in court first thing this morning. So he had to change clothes and get packed, and we were only in one vehicle. Around 6:30 he left and I went back to the house to finish the kitchen. I am a scaredy-cat though, and I was having a hard time staying there by myself in the dark, especially after one of the neighbors rang the doorbell and scared me half to death. I kept my sister on the phone with me while I wasn't painting so I'd have someone to talk to. I finally wound up leaving around 8:30 once I was done because I was so tired and creeped out.

Tonight after work we went over to the house to remove the tape from the kitchen and clean up our painting mess. We brought 4 or 5 boxes to the house and swept in the kitchen, but we were too tired to do anything else. Also, during this time we've been totally neglecting the apartment, so I really needed to do some laundry tonight.

A few more pictures

2008-11-02T11:19:00.002-06:00

Busy, Busy, Busy

2008-10-30T17:50:00.002-05:00

One of the pictures of the kitchen.

We've had a busy few days lately, so I haven't posted anything in a while, but allow me to play catch-up. First of all, no, I haven't heard anything about my interview last Monday. They did tell me it could be "one or two weeks" before they got back to me, so I'm not stressing over it yet.

Yesterday was jam-packed: Z was admitted to the Alabama Bar Association in a 3-hour ceremony (!). One of his law school friends who had moved three hours away came over to spend the night with us the night before so he wouldn't have to drive all that distance the morning of the ceremony. It was a very nice ceremony, but it was very similar to a graduation, with lots of speeches, but there was also the justices of the state supreme court, court of criminal appeals, and court of civic appeals on stage. So there was a little more pomp and circumstance than a regular graduation. They all swore the oath and walked across yet another stage. Then the whole group (hundreds of people) had to get in their cars and drive to the supreme court building to have a formal picture taken on the front steps. All in all, it was lovely, and I missed a good deal of work (of course, this and the house closing are the reasons I've been working through lunch for the past two weeks).

I was only at work for about 5 hours yesterday and then I had to hurry over to the new house where we were having the final walk-through with our real estate agent, the builder, and his agent. That was the first time we'd met the builder, and he is about the nicest person ever. You could tell that the house was his baby, and he took lots of pride in it. One of the reasons we love the house is all the little upgrades he included that really add up. After all these years of living in dorms and apartments, we are used to the absolute cheapest materials and people "getting by" with building things as cheaply/unattractively as humanly possible. But this builder has installed very attractive light fixtures throughout, ceiling fans in every room, a really nice master bathroom, high-end kitchen cabinets, high-end kitchen appliances, etc. It really makes a big difference. For those readers in my family, he reminded me a lot of Kevin Garrett. It was uncanny, actually. They got started before I got there because I refused to take anymore time off from work and didn't arrive until 5:15, so I missed just about everything, but he showed Z how to work the appliances, the sprinkler system, etc.

So now we are one day away from closing on the house. Tomorrow I will get off work at 11:00 (thanks to all my at-desk lunches) so I can have time to go by the bank and get a certified check for closing. Then it's off to the attorney's office. After closing, we'll be headed to buy our fridge, blinds for the whole house, a mailbox, and paint. Saturday morning we'll begin painting the kitchen and master bedroom. My sister is coming down to help us, which should make the day more fun. Tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow. Tomorrow we are buying a house. We've waited so long to find it, waited to get a deal ironed out, waited for the month of October to pass, and here it is, finally. Sometimes it seems like our whole relationship has been an exercise in patience. Since the day we started a serious relationship was spent touring the law school at Ole Miss, it has been one obstacle after another. One big milestone to wait on after another. It was waiting for that summer to be over to discover which law school he was going to attend. Then it was waiting for me to graduate, waiting for a wedding after an 18-month engagement, waiting to find out where we would live, waiting on him to graduate, waiting on his job, waiting on my job, waiting on the bar, waiting on the results, waiting for him to become a real attorney at work. I never thought myself to be a patient person, but maybe I've been wrong. Maybe I'm more patient than I realized, but I've just been tested more than I'd like. Who knows.

I'm guessing I probably won't have a lot of time to blog in the next several days, so I know you'll really miss me. But don't worry, I'll be back! (All of my readers should join Facebook so that you can see pictures as I post them!)

Lake Life Will Be Great

2008-10-27T17:22:00.001-05:00

Yesterday was a great Sunday. After church, Z and I came home, packed a lunch, and went to the lake house to eat on the back porch. It was beautiful – birds chirping, squirrels running around, ducks on the lake. After eating, Z tried to see if any fish were biting in the lake, but it was a little too chilly, I think. Then we raked the back yard (those pine trees better enjoy it now before I chop them down) and decided to go back to the apartment to get the inflatable boat I blogged about in May. You remember, we took it out on the river on Memorial Day weekend and rescued that large boat stuck on the sand.

Anyway, we haven't used it since then because it has been so hot, but yesterday was perfect. We went home, changed clothes, got the raft, and went back to the lake house. (Keep in mind that we do not have possession of the house yet, and there's still a realty sign in the front yard, so some neighbors probably think we're crazy people.) We sat in the backyard and blew up the raft then quickly used the neighbor's pier (we're not actually lake front) to get in the water. We paddled leisurely (more like floated aimlessly) around the whole perimeter of the lake, which took about 2 hours or so. We had ducks following us and a few people in their yard looking at us, but other than that, it was totally secluded.

At one of the farthest points from our house, we noticed a flat sandy area that looked like a great beach to use. So we decided to get out and see if it was someone's yard or just city property. If it was city property, it would be perfect to swim off of (the lake was crazy deep immediately off the shore). So Z gets out, drags the raft onto the sand, and I get out too. We walk up the embankment and see five horses staring at us – it's someone's pasture! They were so pretty, but they seemed pretty surprised to see us standing there. So we got back in the raft and paddled away. We got a little sun, but the water was cold, so it felt great. It was so much fun, but getting out of the raft at the end of our cruise proved troublesome. We don't technically have property on the lake, so we were going to have to use someone's pier or walk up someone's bank (lots of the yards just slope into the water). We haven't gotten a feel for the people who rent the house directly behind us, so even though we used their pier to quickly get in the water, we didn't feel comfortable climbing out onto their pier (Let me clarify – the pier is outside of their fenced-in yard, so I'm not even sure if it's their pier at all, or the city's.) Anyway, we decided we might offend fewer people if we walked out onto a "beach" at another neighbor's yard and quickly walk/carry the raft up the fence line to our backyard. I felt like I was breaking so many rules, but nobody seemed to care too much. Of course when we live there and meet people we're going to ask before doing that again. Another neighbor, the one who talked to us the first time we went to the house, told us we could fish off her pier because she and her husband don't use it, but it's in their fenced-in yard, so I would feel weird about it. (Also, she doesn't even know we bought the house, so she might not even remember us.)

Today is yet another day at work with no lunch break. It's becoming excruciating to stay here. We're not really supposed to eat at our desks, but other people eat in the small kitchen and watch TV. If I can't leave work for lunch, I at least don't want to have to make small talk with coworkers, so I stay at my desk. But since that's not allowed, I eat in about 10 minutes, or as quickly as I can. So all of a sudden I'm not just taking lunch at my desk, I'm really not taking lunch at all. Nine hours seems so much longer than eight… After this week (Z's swearing in and our house closing) I'm never asking for time off ever again. It's not worth it. I've only made up 7 hours of time, but today makes 8 hours. I've got to reach 10.5.

Break

2008-10-25T18:29:00.001-05:00

Sometimes, (admittedly more often when I've been watching football alllllll day long) I like to end a conversation or make my exit by clapping and yelling, "Break!"

Lunchtime Lament

2008-10-23T17:24:00.001-05:00

I have had to ask for lots of time off recently. A few hours this week for my secret interview, and a lot of hours next week for Z getting sworn in as an attorney and closing on Halloween. Well, I'm not salaried here, so I'm working through lunches to make sure I still get my regular paycheck. Except, when I say "working through lunches" I mean eating lunch at my desk and reading news stories online, because there's nothing for me to do. It's a time thing, not a work-getting-done thing. So, I've sat at my desk through lunch everyday for a whole week now. I still "owe" 4.5 more hours… Ugh…

Oh, wait, I just checked my calendar, and apparently my probationary period of 90 days was up on Tuesday. So that means I am salaried now. But, just looked it up in the manual, and you still only get time off after you've worked an entire quarter with perfect attendance. Seriously? And, no, being salaried now doesn't mean I don't have to check in and out or stop keeping a time sheet. None of that changes. So, you might ask, "What exactly is the difference between being hourly and salary there?" Um, there is no difference. I asked.

But, as referenced in my previous post, last night we had delicious pot roast for dinner, so today I had a lovely roast beef sandwich for lunch, so it was OK. It beats the peanut butter and honey sandwich from yesterday.

Ode to Publix

2008-10-23T17:22:00.001-05:00

Last night was a great night. I was dreading it when I left work, because I had a headache and needed to run errands, but it turned out to be very nice. I'd started the crock pot before leaving for work that morning, so when we got home, there was pot roast ready. I cooked some broccoli & cheese, butter beans, and mac & cheese to go with it, and we ate dinner (on time – not after the gym!) Then we headed out to the local cigar shop to pick out some special cigars for my baby brother's birthday. OK, so he's not a baby anymore (as evidenced by the cigars) but he'll always be my baby brother, and today's his birthday. After that, we needed to go grocery shopping, and I just happened to remember that Prattvegas has a brand-spanking-new Publix and that yesterday was the grand opening!

I already love Publix – huge selection, exceptionally clean stores, friendly staff, what more could you ask for – but a brand new one? I was psyched. The brand new Best Buy next door (it's a newly built shopping center with brand new stores everywhere. There's also a JC Penney and Belk that just opened.) was calling our name first, so we ducked in to check out their refrigerators, but their salespeople were a tad too pushy, so we left pretty quickly.

We walked over to Publix where they had really rolled out the red carpet. There were samples everywhere, chances to win prizes, etc. The place was packed of course, but I felt like I was in heaven. Their produce section alone is larger than life, and it just got better from there. It was wonderful because there were lots of buy-one-get-one-free specials and to top it off, they always take your groceries to your car. Yep, I'm sold. I'm one of those people that really love grocery shopping, but I get stressed out doing it. You see, when I shop, I'm thinking about what I'm going to cook and when I'm going to use the items. For instance, when Christmas is coming up and I have to go buy stick margarine, that's not just a boring grocery item because I think about the macaroni and cheese that I take to Granny's house for Christmas. And the Cheerios are not just cereal; they're going into Mama's recipe for Chex Mix that I'm making this year. Grocery shopping is emotional for me, and if I can do that in a beautiful environment, that's even better.

I have a connection with Publix anyway. Let me explain: I sometimes grab a few groceries here and there while I'm at Wal-Mart buying something else (I'm cheap – what can I say?), but when I am purely grocery shopping, I used to be a Food World girl (that was our best grocery store where I grew up). In college, there was a time when my sister had moved to town, and Z was already off at law school. My sister spent a lot of time together, and when it came time for Thanksgiving, my college graduation (December), and Christmas, I did lots of shopping/cooking with her. She shopped at Publix in Alabaster, and we always had lots of fun buying ingredients to go make something. Then, after I got married and was living in Tuscaloosa, I discovered a Publix just past my office. That fall/winter/spring (the relatively cold parts) I only did my grocery shopping at Publix. Picture it: It's cold outside. You rush indoors to escape the wind and are met with complimentary coffee or hot chocolate. Their bakery is working overtime for the holidays, so it's smelling great. The oversized aisles (really – they're huge!) are filled to the brim with wonderful basics as well as the hard-to-find stuff. Everyone smiles at you and asks how you're doing. When you check out, they are friendly and load your car for you. Then when you get home, your husband has the fireplace roaring. I don't care how much you might not like shopping – that's perfect. Anyway, we moved in mid-May, and Prattvegas didn't have a Publix then (hello, it just opened, keep up). So I had to shop at a run-down Food World staffed by bored teenagers. It was OK, but it wasn't "a pleasure," if you will (sorry – I had to). Now that Publix is open, I think I feel more at home down here. The seasons are changing, Publix feels comfortable and familiar, we're about to move out of our cramped apartment that was just a stop-gap for us. It feels like all is right with the world. (If you think that's stupid, then you quit your job and leave your friends and uproot your life and move away from your family and start a new job you hate. Then come talk to me about the little comforts in life. I'll take what I can get.)

Interview with Dept. of Education

2008-10-21T17:21:00.000-05:00

Yesterday went very well. After being a bundle of nerves, I left work at about 3:00. I was wearing my suit pants, the camisole that goes with my suit, and a sweater over that. I drove to the large parking lot a block or so away from the building, changed into my suit, calmed my nerves, checked my lipstick, and started my trek. That's sort of a long way in uncomfortable shoes, holding a heavy portfolio. I made it to the building, but had to ask for directions 3 times to find the office I was looking for. I was a little early, so I was able to collect my thoughts and relax a little until the two men were ready to meet with me. I met with the Director of Communications and the Communications Manager, the #1 and #2 respectively. I feel like the interview went very well. I gave good answers that they seemed pleased to hear, I provided witty banter, I brought tons of samples of my work. Who cares if your resume says you've written things if you write like crap? I brought a pretty large portfolio though, and had extra copies so they could keep them. Then I toured department a little. If I get it (big if – there are several other applicants) my office would be flippin' sweet. Seriously, it's about the size of my apartment's living room. All in all, it was a positive experience, but like I said, there are others in the running, so I'm not going to get my hopes up. The work is about 60% media relations, 20% writing/editing for newsletters and magazines, and about 20% video production/miscellaneous. They seemed like very nice, professional people (emphasis on the professional – finally.) Everyone I met was friendly. But like I said, I'm not going to obsess over it. They let me know that there's a chance they will be conducting a second round of interviews. That would not make me happy because I'll be fighting for that job once I'm fired here for missing too much work!

Two, Two, Two Posts in One!

2008-10-16T17:33:00.002-05:00

OK, I am tired of the numerical format. Counting my blessings has certainly served its purpose – I spend time each day thinking of all the many things I have to be thankful for, and I'm much less negative. Of course, that comes along with having a job and a paycheck, and the bar exam being over, and the house hunt being over. But, still, I'm not feeling crappy, and I've made my point. So the counting's over.

With that being said, I'm still totally thankful. What is uppermost in my mind right now is the Department of Education. Let me clarify for a second: when they hold exams for a state position, it's open for any state department. Each state department has at least one Public Information Specialist, and some have upwards of a dozen. Some departments are Department of Transportation, Department of Public Safety (state troopers), Department of Art, and the list goes on forever. So you can see that some might just be jobs, but some you could actually be passionate about. Well, I've always been passionate about education, and the Dept. of Ed. just so happens to be the first state department to contact me after my exam results came in. Two days ago the Communications Manager called me, and I was able to have a secretive phone interview sitting in my car at work. The phone interview went extremely well. The manager and I had a great rapport, and I put a lot of stock in things like that. He said my resume was "extremely impressive" and seemed to really like a lot of the answers I gave. He also let me in on a little secret that we examinees are not told: there were only 14 people placed into the top band I am in. From those, he contacted what he called the "top 5." So, that does mean he called 4 other people to interview for the position, but that means he placed me in the top 5! So, we chatted for about half an hour while I was praying no one was looking for me inside. Then I turned my cell phone off, because I don't keep it on at work.

When I left work and turned my phone back on, I had a voicemail from the administrative assistant to the Director of Communications wanting to set up a second interview with me – yippee! Now, of course this was after 5:00 already, so I waited until this morning to call back. When I arrived at work, I sat in my car for a few minutes and called at 8:00. She seemed very nice, but there were only a couple of blocks of times for me to choose from – there were no offers to meet during lunch or at 5:15 after work, even though I'd explained to the manager yesterday that I'm currently employed. So I took an appointment in the late afternoon for next Monday, but I feel guilty about it.

I don't know who made it to this next round of interviews. When I spoke to the manager yesterday (Wednesday) morning, he said there were 2 out of 5 people who hadn't returned his call yet. Perhaps it's only between me and one or two other people. I have no idea. I just know that if this opportunity doesn't work out, the next department has got to work with me a little more because I'll get fired if I keep taking time off to interview.

I forgot to ever blog about the preacher's visit. Here's what I wrote the day after, but I forgot to ever post it:

Last night the preacher and his "posse" came over. It was really only 2 other nice people – I guess big group of people splits into smaller groups to go visiting, and our group contained the senior pastor because he had to talk to me about baptism. We had a lovely visit and got to know one another, and he of course had to ask me about getting baptized. I told him I understand that it is something I will have to do again. He clarified that the church is not judging Methodists or our way of doing anything, but that they are committed to baptism by immersion to symbolize the death of Jesus, the burial (going beneath the water), and rising after 3 days. I can live with that. It was good to get that cleared up too, and not just hear, "This is the correct and only way to be baptized. Period." Then I wouldn't be joining the church. Anyway, I still got emotional discussing it with him, but he really put me at ease explaining that it's just the way they do it, they're not claiming I've been taught incorrectly, etc. That would have greatly offended me. But that didn't happen, and I still like him very much.

Yesterday afternoon Z left for an overnight business trip because he had to be in court in north Alabama first thing this morning. I have two reasons for being happy about this: first, he is a little bit ADD, so having a job where he can travel around the state and not be cooped up in his office does him a world of good; second, he gets reimbursed for his time away, so each month he gets extra pay for any overnight trips he took. That will add up to be a nice, albeit small, bonus.

So I guess I'm the official copy-editor at work. Don't think I get any credit for it. I most certainly am not on any of the mastheads. I'm not even listed on any of our Web sites, even though my title is Marketing Director, and people might need to contact me. Besides that, I've been here for 3 months… Anyway, I now copy-edit all seven of our publications, as well as our internal newsletter. I'm constantly having editors override me and my changes, however, even when my changes come straight out of our company's style guide which was – wait for it – written by the editors. They honestly cannot decide if they want to spell it website (their current preference), web site (our style guide), or Web site (AP style). It's annoying, but I can get over that. The real atrocity occurred a couple of weeks ago, though. I was copy-editing our largest magazine, the only one on sale at book stores, grocery stores, etc. (the rest are by subscription only to those in the industry). As I was reading a several-page story, I became very confused. After flipping back and forth several times, I realized that when production had flowed the copy onto the page, at least one sentence was lost. It simply was not there. No problem – I had caught it on the first round of proofreading. So I marked it, along with a million other corrections, and returned it to production. After the magazine shipped to the printer, I thought all was right with the world. The problem with being the lowly copy-editor who the editors refuse to speak to or acknowledge in any way is that I never get to look at things after I put my two cents in. When I see them again, the magazines are already printed and my changes have either been made or ignored. At my old magazine, shipping was the end. Of course, we published every 2 weeks, so there was no time for changes after the printer got it. But here, the printer ships back another round of proofs and gives us one last chance to check for any glaring mistakes. The head of production (essentially, my job at my last magazine… that causes some tension) asked me to look over it one last time, which was the first time I'd been asked to do that. (I've only been copy-editing for about a month or so.) As soon as I got to the problem page, I noticed the missing sentence hadn't been corrected! I got very upset and showed it to the head of production. She got very upset and showed it to the head honcho. The head honcho, in all her wisdom and level-headedness, decided that it wasn't worth the hundred bucks to ask the printer to fix it in order to salvage our editorial integrity and save our readers the confusion of wondering what they'd missed. I later learned it was not just one or two sentences. It was an entire paragraph. And, to clarify, the first page was actually cut off mid-sentence. So there was an article or adjective or such, no period, then you flip to the next page, and you're reading about a completely different topic. Way to protect our image. I don't know who I am working for, but I know I don't respect them for that decision.

Boring Weekend

2008-10-13T17:32:00.001-05:00

Today I'm thankful because:

1. Z has the day off. He got to sleep in this morning in remembrance of Christopher Columbus.

2. Last night Z took my car to the gas station so I wouldn't have to do it on my way to work this morning. (OK, I asked him to do it, but I'm still thankful I didn't have to pump gas this morning.)

3. I took another step and am making plans to meet with the woman who could possibly be my boss at Z's office.

4. Last Thursday, my mother's cousin and his wife had their first baby, and she is beautiful! Hopefully they will be at our family reunion over Thanksgiving so I can meet her.

5. The grocery store last night had delicious-looking Gala apples, and I brought one with me to work for an afternoon snack.

This weekend was slow and almost boring, but in a good way.

Friday we had to go to the gym since we'd skipped on Thursday. Afterwards we looked at paint colors at Home Depot. We are sort of having a hard time agreeing on paint colors, so that was not necessarily fun.

Saturday, Z was up watching football before I was even awake. Alabama wasn't even playing this week, but it never stops at our house. After h-o-u-r-s of watching football, that afternoon we drove over to the house to think about landscaping. When we drove up, though, we saw that the pesky pine trees had covered the backyard with pine straw. What a nuisance – that will kill the sod if it just sits there, so we found a rake that someone had left buried in muscadine vines at the back of the yard. We took turns raking the pine straw off the sod, but of course, when it was my turn, I must have pulled or twisted something because my back is killing me now, in one little area. While we were there we made friends with a neighbor's cat and thought about flower gardens, etc. That night was more football…

Sunday we went to church, had chicken for lunch, and watched Encino Man. Z went outside after a while to clean out the inside of our cars: vacuuming, dusting, etc. I read/napped in the recliner while he did that. That evening we decided to try out the new IHOP for dinner. The food was good, but the service truly sucked and we couldn't get out fast enough. Waiters were sitting around talking about how they were quitting the next day… It was not a good environment. After that we went to the grocery store and stocked up.

See? Kind of boring. But not bad.

I just got an e-mail from the preacher, and he will be visiting tonight – yipes! I'm a little nervous! He's a very nice guy, but I'm slightly anxious about what they'll say to me. In their eyes, I might as well not have belonged to any church, and that is troubling to me. They're going to tell me I have to be baptized again, and that bothers me a little too. So I'm a little nervous and apprehensive. I guess we'll just see what happens.

Good Times

2008-10-10T17:03:00.001-05:00

So last night was Grey's Anatomy, and I try hard to never miss Grey's Anatomy, but Z doesn't want to watch it, and I can't watch it with other commentators. I need to focus. So, anyway, I always watch alone, and last night was no different. I was in the bedroom with the door closed so I could watch. I had a stack of pillows, with mine on top, while I watched. When the episode was over, I went to the living room to let him know it was over and we could hang out together now. Well, he was in the recliner asleep. (For those of you who watch Grey's, you know it is only 9:00 by this point.) When Z falls asleep like this, it's best to just stay out of his way because he is definitely out of it. So he looks at me when I walk out of the bedroom, and I say, "Were you sleeping?" He sort of mumbles an answer and I can't tell if I'd woken him up or if he was mad about something. But, sure enough, he gets out of the recliner with gusto (he moves really quickly when he's just been woken up – it's strange) and power walks into the bathroom to brush his teeth. Then he turns off the bedroom light (it was on up until this point) and gets in bed. I'm still standing in the living room thinking, "It's only 9:00. I'm not that tired yet." So I go into the office to check e-mail, and read news online. After a few minutes though, I figure that if I wait much longer, I'll wake him up again when I go to bed, but if I go now, it probably won't bother him. (It was about 9:20 by this point.) So I turn out the lights and go into the bedroom. Yesterday Z had to be at work at 7:00 to go to court, so he'd had the alarm clock set extra early and had it sitting on his side of the bed. So, in the dark, I have to go find the alarm clock and take it into the bathroom to reset the time. My eyes adjust so slowly to the dark, so I can't see a thing. Once in the bathroom with the door shut behind me, I turn on the light, set the alarm clock to the correct time, and brush my teeth. Then I brace myself for the dark once I leave the bathroom. The bedroom is not very wide, and my side of the bed is really close to the wall, so I'm always afraid I'm going to bump into furniture or knock a picture onto my head. But I go into the bedroom and it is so dark that it hurts my eyes (you know what I mean?). So dark that I see things swimming out in front of me. Anyway, I feel my way around until I find the bed (by jamming my hip against it) and finally crawl into bed. I lie down and – bam – my head hits the mattress, not my pillow. I realize that Z must have been so deeply asleep when he walked into the bedroom that, even though the light was on, he didn't notice my pile of pillows. Well, I feel around a little, but I don't want to smack him in the face, and I can't see a thing. I figure, maybe I can sleep anyway. It'll be like napping on the couch, just without a couch arm… I fold my arms underneath my head, and I think I even sleep for a few minutes. But eventually it is just too uncomfortable. By now my eyes have adjusted to the dark, so I roll over and, sure enough, Z is fast asleep, practically sitting up, propped up by pillows. And my pillow is on top of the pile. It's pretty funny looking. I don't want to wake him up, but there's no way that I'm going to get any sleep without a pillow (you try it – it's harder than you'd think). So I lean over and whisper, "Can I have my pillow back?" He's sort of like those sleep walkers that you're not supposed to wake up – sometimes he gets crazy. He just mumbles but doesn't wake up. So I whisper, "I'm going to take my pillow back, OK?" So I grab onto my pillow with both hands and pull on it just enough to make him mumble and roll over. When he does, I yank my pillow like those people who pull a tablecloth while leaving all the dishes in place. His head just lingers in mid-air for a second before plunking down onto the next pillow. He never even noticed. This morning I tried to tell him all this, and he didn't remember a bit of it. As a matter of fact, the only reason I told him the story is because he asked when/how he went to bed. So, I had to tell him. I even got in the floor to show him how ridiculous he looked sleeping with his neck straight up. Good times.

I Hate Skipping Lunch

2008-10-07T17:28:00.000-05:00

Today I'm thankful because:

1. I was able to save gas by not going anywhere during lunch.

2. Yesterday we started going back to the gym, after a week-long illness-induced hiatus. (I know, that's usually not listed up here, but it's a love/hate relationship.)

3. I sent out my first resume after getting the results from my exam! (Shh, don't tell anybody.)

4. I went to the grocery store yesterday, and although it wasn't a full trip, it makes me feel good to have the fridge and cabinets well stocked.

5. Z will be assigned his state car tomorrow, meaning our fuel expenses will officially be cut in half, thank God. He will be traveling quite often for his job, so he gets his own car (you know, the kind that scares you on the interstate, but turns out to not really be a cop) and a separate credit card for his gas expenses. Hooray!

Last night the senior pastor of our new church came to visit (Methodists don't do that, so I'm not used to people dropping by unannounced). Just one problem though – we weren't at home. That's the second time we've missed a visit from someone at that church. The first time, we had just gotten in from the gym and I got a call on my cell phone. The man introduced himself and said he'd like to visit with us – he never said he was sitting at the gate to our apartment! I told him it was not a good time and explained we'd just gotten home. He seemed fine with it, but the next Sunday when we visited a new Sunday school class, he turned out to be the teacher, and he said that he'd been at the gate. I felt horrible – I would have let him in if I'd realized that! Well last night when we got home from the gym (admittedly later than usual) Z had a voicemail from the preacher saying he was at the gate and would like to visit, but he'd call back some other time. What a reputation we're creating for ourselves. Oh well. If someone would call before they arrive and set up a time to visit, I would make sure to be home and have the apartment picked up, and I'd probably have coffee on and cookies in the oven. I like to be a good hostess, but I don't like to be surprised.

Yesterday we met with the lady from the mortgage company (I don't know what to call her – loan officer?) which took two hours. At my old job, that wouldn't have mattered a lick, as long as I did what I had to do (stay late, eat lunch at my desk the next day, or nothing). Nobody cared so long as my work was still completed. Here, I was terrified. I called the receptionist after about an hour and a half to let her know I wasn't dead. And today, even though I didn't have enough work to warrant it, I stayed in during the lunch hour to make up that time. I find that to be completely crappy. I just sat here reading e-mails and reading online news, but I was here, gosh darnit. Man, I'm over it.

So we found out yesterday that we were mistaken on the date our lease ended. Apparently, these landlords round up to the end of the month, no matter what date your lease begins. (So, our 6 month lease will last slightly longer than 6.5 months… go figure.) Also, they're definitely not willing to negotiate and let us leave a couple of weeks early, which would actually be 6 months. Anyway, so we're stuck with paying an entire month's rent after we close on the house. I guess we'll definitely be able to take our time on moving…

Solid Weekend

2008-10-06T19:36:00.001-05:00

Today I'm thankful because:

1. We were able to go to Tuscaloosa Saturday to watch Alabama play, as well as visit with good friends.

2. I think we can make good friends in our Sunday School class. There are good people there, and they're very friendly and generous too. They're practically strangers, yet several of them have offered their help, trucks, even painting supplies for our move. That's Christian love.

3. Yesterday Z and I decided to join the church we've been visiting for a few months.

4. Last night we rented movies and had a nice, relaxing end to the weekend.

5. Today we met with our lady at the mortgage company to go over some more paperwork and discuss, well, a bunch of boring crap. She kind of gets on our nerves.

This weekend was busy, but fun. All last week, Z and I hadn't really been feeling good. Not terribly ill, just sort of yucky. So Friday evening, after we got in from work, both of us fell sound asleep for about 3 or 4 hours. We got up later that night and just lounged around, neither one of us feeling like doing anything.

Saturday morning we got up bright and early to go to Tuscaloosa. That's slightly more than 2 hours away from us now, so we had to leave with plenty of time. The drive was relatively smooth (lots of traffic though), but when we got in town, and specifically on campus, we noticed that our regular parking places were all roped off or blocked with traffic cones. So we drove around and around until finally we gave up and parked about a gajillion miles away. By this time it was about 12:30 and HOT. We stopped as soon as we saw porta-potties (we had been in the car for a long time), and I opened the door on a man who was peeing. He just laughed and said, "I never lock these things." Why in the world not? The green on the outside means "come on in." Anyway, we had quite a distance to hike until reaching the quad where we were meeting up with my old work friends. By the time we got there, I was feeling weird but really hungry. Z got me a bottle of water and we both ate a hotdog from my old company's tailgating tent. Then I felt really bad. I got sort of queasy and dizzy and light headed. I sat down on a cooler, but had to get up each time someone wanted a drink out of it. So finally I sat down on the ground against a tree (very dangerous on the quad on game day) because I felt like I would faint if I had to stand any longer.

Eventually, it was time to go meet another friend who had our tickets. We walked over to the stadium to meet him and get our tickets. Then we quickly moved inside because I felt downright horrible. We found our seats, but they were in the north end zone and weren't destined to be in the shade until after half time. It was SO HOT and I felt completely crappy. By the time the shade finally reached our section though, I felt 100% better, so I suppose I was just overheated. I get that from my mother.

After the game, we walked back to my ex-company's tent to get 2 cokes before our long trek back to the car. It was almost completely dark by the time we reached the car. We headed over to our good friend C's apartment after that. She had made a casserole and mashed potatoes for us, and we had a good time visiting with her, but we were so hot and sticky, and we had such a long drive back to Prattvegas, that we couldn't stay long at all.

We got back home and showered immediately then fell asleep hard. Sunday morning we went to Sunday School and church, and we decided to go ahead and join the church. We'd been visiting for a few months now, and we both like it, and we're both ready to get involved in a church family again. It's difficult for me though because I'm Methodist, and it's a Baptist church. The differences aren't huge or horrible, but there are differences, and it was a more emotional experience for me than I thought it would be. I will have to be baptized again because the Baptist church does not recognize infant baptism. That is an extremely touchy subject for me, but the bottom line is that we're all Christians, and I know in my heart what I believe and feel. After the service, lots of very friendly people came up to speak with us and welcome us to the church. That's one of the first things we liked about that church – the people are just the right amount of nice. Not too pushy, not too stand-offish. Just perfect.

After church, we drove over to the lake house to see if they'd put up the "Sold" sign yet. They had, and I made Z take my picture next to it. We only got that picture and one of me at the front door before the batteries in my camera went dead. So, even though we saw more beautiful Canadian geese, I again didn't get a picture of them.

After that we went back home and took a nap. I am not ashamed – I love and cherish my Sunday afternoon nap. I get that from my mother too. Anyway, we completely skipped lunch because of the nap, but I guess I still wasn't feeling great because I didn't have an appetite anyway. In the late afternoon we went to the movie rental store and got two movies – Forgetting Sarah Marshall and The Heartbreak Kid. We came back home and Z grilled steaks while I cooked French fries, macaroni and cheese, and green beans. Then we ate and watched the first movie. It was funny, but wow there were a lot of full-frontal male scenes. You don't usually see a lot of those… Also, during the movie and after it, I did 5 loads of laundry. That's what happens when you have a whole sick week – lots of laundry piles up. I'm glad there's an actual laundry room in the lake house, so it won't be in a tiny closet off the tiny kitchen like it is now in our apartment.

I really want to have a party at our new home once we move in. It's not that I want a house-warming party, although lots of people have asked me about that. It's just that I really miss all my friends and family. It's been since the wedding that we've seen some of them, and that makes me very sad. I just hope we can get in gear quickly enough to get walls painted, our stuff in and organized, and then have people celebrate with us. The house is painted very nicely in a pretty color, but it's just that all the walls are the same color, so we want to paint a few rooms. We'll probably leave the living room and hall bathroom and one bedroom that color. But I think we want to paint the kitchen, dining room, master bedroom and master bath. We'll see – that will get kind of expensive.

More Good News (see #5)

2008-10-03T21:01:00.002-05:00

I am posting this much later than usual because I fell asleep immediately after work, and I just woke up at 9:00!

Today I am thankful because:
1. The lake house was inspected yesterday afternoon, and we received the report last night. There was nothing major, but a few repairs do need to be made. I'm glad we hired him, even though some people tried to tell us we didn't need an inspection for a new construction.

2. A friend of mine from my last job found 2 tickets to Alabama's home game tomorrow for Z and me. It's been a long time since we went to a game, and even though I don't love football, it is fun to go to a large campus for a big game, especially when Alabama's team has been so impressive this season.

3. Tomorrow we'll get to visit with friends while we're in town!

4. For lunch today I had some great leftovers from Mellow Mushroom. I believe that if I go out to eat somewhere other than fast food, I should be able to get at least 2 meals out of it. My calzone last night at dinner was so large, however, that I didn't finish it at lunch today either. Three meals – score! (What can I say? My mother taught me to be fanatically thrifty.)

5. I got placed in the top band of my exam class. The state does banded scoring, grouping people together who performed similarly. I'm in the top group!

Just the List Today, Folks

2008-10-01T17:26:00.000-05:00

Today I'm thankful because:

1. It's probably just about 2 more weeks until I get the results from my test.

2. I am really, really thankful that Z and I have super-high credit scores, because in this tumultuous time, getting approved for a home loan would have been much more difficult if we'd had sketchy credit. We may have other differences, but we feel the same way about money, which, I suppose, is another thing I'm thankful for.

3. Our timing with the house was pretty good – our apartment, which has a dumpster just like every other apartment in the world, has decided to begin a new "service." They are using a garbage pickup service and automatically charging us $20 bucks more a month. Yet there sits the dumpster with a handy little drive-through so you can easily drop your trash off. I don't get it… (But, at least they are also picking up recycling – hooray for recycling!) Anyway, for the rest of our lease, there will be an additional $20 due for no reason.

4. I just scheduled our home inspection for tomorrow afternoon. I feel almost positive that it will be fine, since it's a new construction, but you never know. Z and I are both "better safe than sorry" type of people.

5. The home inspection will be $25 less than I thought! (Which isn't much when you're talking about hundreds of dollars, but still…)

New House

2008-09-30T17:25:00.003-05:00

Today I'm thankful because:
1. We got the house!
2. I got paid today (that makes #1 seem even better)
3. I'm busy changing our address on everything (I get a lot of magazines).
4. My boss is not at work today.
5. Maybe the late-night meetings and all-weekend house hunting is over for a few years!

I am very excited. After waiting through the weekend, the house builder finally settled on a price with us, and we all agreed. Last night after work, we went over to sign the official paperwork, since the last few prices were only verbal offers. We will work on getting a home inspection done in the next week (I know – it's a new construction – but we're scared of electrical fires, etc) and then closing is set for Halloween day.

After signing some paperwork last night, we went over to the house. This was the first time we'd been there knowing it would be ours. The other times we had to look at it through the same eyes that looked at other houses thinking, what if? So this time I took a bunch of pictures. It was getting dark by this time, so they didn't turn out great, but people wanted to see pictures, and you've got to keep the people happy.

House Update

2008-09-27T09:17:00.002-05:00

OK, somehow a miracle occurred and both of our bosses let us leave work at lunchtime. This was especially incredible because, after my work function on Thursday night, she let me arrive at work on Friday at 10:00. So, I was only there for 2 hours, and you can believe I didn't do a bit of work, after receiving the news about the bar exam! So, anyway, we're both done at noon. We discuss the house a little, talk about money, go get lunch, then go to the realtor's office. We make an offer. Afterwards we go to the lake house. Sitting on the back porch, envisioning how wonderful it would be to live there, we all of sudden see about 30 huge Canadian geese come floating around the corner on the lake. We both just sit there and watch them all, in perfect formation, float down the lake until they're out of sight. It was incredible. And I, of course, took it as a sign.

So at dinner last night (we tried out an oyster bar we'd never been to before. It was smoky and loud - that's not for me) we get a call from the realtor. The builder has counter-offered. We'd expected that, so we were ready with another counter. That was last night around 7:30 or so, and we haven't heard back since. So there's your update.

Hurrah!

2008-09-26T10:40:00.001-05:00

HE PASSED THE BAR EXAM!

Short and Sweet

2008-09-24T17:30:00.000-05:00

Today I'm thankful because:

1. Spontaneity is fun! Last night, we decided to go to the first night of the county fair rather than the gym. We weren't even sure where it was, but we just drove around until we found it. The rides were pretty crappy, so we never bought any tickets, but we looked at the artwork and everything that had won prizes, then we watched various kids' groups (dance, karate) perform. We ate hot dogs and watched a karaoke contest. It got chilly (yay!) as the night went on. All in all, it was a pretty good time!

2. There are only two more days to wait for results.

3. Today is my best friend's birthday – happy birthday!

4. A work function that people have been stressing out over since I started working here will finally take place tomorrow night. I'm so glad, because I'm sick of hearing about it.

5. I had a nice lunch with my hubby today. We never have lunch together, so it was nice.

About tomorrow night – don't anybody tell me what happens on Grey's Anatomy. That's right, my work function will take place during the 2-hour season premiere, and I will miss it. And then the next day, well, you know, that's a pretty big day. So chances are good that I won't have a chance to watch it until Saturday.

Ramblings

2008-09-23T21:34:00.001-05:00

Today I'm thankful because:
1. Today is Z's birthday!

2. I had a lovely conversation with my friend from my old job. It makes the morning go by so much faster when you take a personal call at work. I miss her.

3. It has been a beautiful day!

4. Yesterday when I left work, I drove to the lake house instead of straight home, to see just how long it would take me. Ten minutes flat. It usually takes me 20-25 minutes to get to the apartment, partly because I have to drive 6 miles more on the interstate, but also because after I exit the interstate, I sit in traffic and battle throngs of cars and multitudes of red lights. But going to the lake house, there's an exit created only for that highway, so you exit and have NO stops or turns or lights for about 5 miles. There is one large intersection, but that is the only red light. Other than that, it's a four-lane highway, and you can just GO HOME.

5. After almost 8 weeks, my hair is finally at the length it was before I got the haircut I didn't like. Now I'm officially growing it long again. Of course, it's barely chin-length now, so maybe in three years. I wish, wish, wish it could be as long and beautiful as my friend's that I spoke to this morning. Her hair is gorgeous.

It is 3:08 and I am just now beginning to write. That means I've been slightly busier than normal today, but not a great deal, and not busy doing work – I've been making lists about the lake house. I think I've mentioned before how I can't live without my lists. OK, so I admit I'm a little obsessive about them, but they honestly help me. If I have a good idea for something in the future, I might forget it unless I write it down. So far, I've made lists about all the things we'll have to buy that we never had to consider before (like a refrigerator), all the things I've never retrieved from home (including the antiques I got from my father's estate, and my wedding china which has been safe and sound instead of moving around with us), plants we've discussed putting in the yard, and decorating ideas we've had about the house (like which colors we like for each room and where I'd like to put which pictures). I'm a list freak.

As I mentioned above, it is Z's birthday. He doesn't really seem to care about his birthday, but especially this year. He told me the other day that he forgot his birthday was coming up because all he can do is think and worry and stew about the bar exam results, which we get in 3 days. I happen to love my birthday. Of course, getting too excited about things like that just lead to disappointment, like my birthday this year. It was the day we were driving home from the beach, a couple of days after Z's law school graduation and the day before I threw my friend a baby shower and resigned from work. It was two days before we moved. It was a stressful time, and then we wound up going to Z's parents' house to borrow their truck to help with the move. So there we sit, after a long drive, on my birthday, in his parents' living room listening to his dad yell (literally) about how we wants to sue the mayor of his city over lumber on his own property. It's a long story. But, anyway, I felt like my birthday was ruined. It was absolutely the very last way I wanted to celebrate my birthday. (Although later that night Z gave me my gifts. He'd gotten me some of our wedding china and a beautiful magazine rack/table I'd registered for.) Anyway, I guess Z's better off not expecting anything out of his day. That way it's just a regular day. We got up this morning, I gave him his gifts (a picture he wanted for his office and new sunglasses to replace the ones that got ruined at Six Flags), he went to work early to finish a project, we will go to the gym tonight, then we'll have beef tips and rice for dinner. Exciting, I know.

Sometimes I complain about the kids around here, but the cutest little boy (OK, not really. "My boys" I babysat for are totally cuter. See my wedding pictures on Facebook for proof.) just came up to ask me to buy cookie dough for his school. I'm a big believer in buying that stuff even if I don't necessarily want/need it. It's for a good cause, right? And sometimes it's free, because at my old office, some woman sold me popcorn from her son's boy scouts troop, and she must have lost my check, because it never cleared the bank. But the popcorn sure was good…

OK, I totally forgot to mention this yesterday, but how gross is this? I walked into the bathroom yesterday and sitting on top of the toilet paper dispenser was a small tube of something. I thought to myself: someone has accidentally left something sitting here. What is it? I looked closer (although thank God I didn't touch it). It was a tube of anti-fungal cream. Seriously. I turned around and practically ran to the desk of my friend where we proceeded to try to use deductive reasoning to find out who it belonged to. I'm pretty sure we guessed the culprit.

I have to vent for a second. Even though keeping this blog does help me to get some stress out and express some creativity, the purpose of me starting it was because I was moving away from some very good friends, and they all wanted me to "keep in touch." Everyone kept telling me that they wanted to hear from me, talk to me, see me, visit with me, etc. I knew that if we didn't try hard to keep in touch, we wouldn't be friends anymore. Everyone has had friendships that were great, but eventually life causes them to just fizzle. (How many of your "best friends" from college do you really talk to, not just keep up with through Facebook?) So I told them I was going to keep this blog and they could read it to know what's going on in my life. This way I wouldn't have to tell the same stories a hundred times, forget who I told them to, inadvertently leave people out of the loop, etc. I for one would love it if more of my friends kept blogs so I could know what was going on in their lives. So imagine my disappointment when, from some of my friends, I hear those vague questions like, "So what's new with you?" Uh, really? Or, "So, what ever happened with that house you liked a few weeks ago?" Or, my personal favorite, "Has Z taken the bar yet?" Seriously? I thought you wanted to keep in touch. (Sidebar: if you're reading this, I'm clearly not talking about you.) Anyway, it isn't that I didn't want my friends to call me and actually talk to me – I'm not being anti-social or trying to prevent conversations. I was trying to make it easier for you to not just forget about me once I moved away. I want all of my friends, old and new, to be in my life and know what is going on in my life. So, if you do read this entry, although you obviously haven't read any others in at least 2 months, don't stop calling me or emailing me. Just know that I am not keeping you out of the loop – it's all right here!

This is the Week

2008-09-22T17:59:00.001-05:00

Today I'm thankful because:

1. This is the week! On Friday we should find out if Z passed the bar exam. If so, we will most likely make an offer on the lake house.

2. I had a great weekend full of nice weather, relaxation, and excitement about the house.

3. I have wonderful leftovers from Cracker Barrel for lunch (hey, it's the little things).

4. My mother and stepdad like the lake house as much as we do.

5. I didn't run out of gas driving home for lunch. Seriously, I felt like Kramer testing the car to see how much father he can go once the needle's on E.

This weekend was great. It was the perfect mixture of lazy and fun so that I don't feel exhausted, and I don't feel like there was no weekend. It started sort of early, which always helps, because on Friday my office went to tour the Hyundai plant. That means we essentially stopped work at lunchtime and never looked back. We ate pizza and then left for the plant, then we were able to go home when we returned to the office (around 3:45.) The tour itself was actually very interesting and fun. The drama leading up to it – not so much.

That morning, my office friend decided she had too much work to do, and she shouldn't go. Well, my take-it-personally boss got her feelings hurt and went on a rampage about "I didn't plan this for myself. It's for the people. You should participate and have fun." I sort of agreed, because we were all carpooling to the plant, and she was my ride. So here I was with a friend who was upset about being yelled at for being a diligent worker, and a furious boss, and no ride. It's not like I have other friends here – I pretty much don't. So, somehow, I wind up in the Mercedes with the 2 co-owners of the company and the son of one of them (who happens to be the man who recruited me.) I was upset at first, because I'd been left out to dry pretty much, and was now forced into an awkward ride with the big bosses, but then I quickly realized I had the best seat in the house, by far. They are old (one of them is 70) and funny, and most of all, not psycho like the other boss, who is not a co-owner. So I rode with them, and we talked about everything but work, which was delightful. They opened the car door for me, treated me nicely, etc. Everything was the exact opposite of my loud-mouth bossy other boss. Then we went on the tour, which was fun, and rode back to the office. Like I said, we were able to leave after that, so I got home around 4:30, which was great! I cleaned up the apartment a little, but I wound up falling asleep on the couch until Z got home from work.

Saturday was a nice day too. We looked at houses, watched way too much football (I can tolerate about 1.5 games a day, nothing more), and I was able to catch up on my magazines. I also did laundry (hooray) and cleaned up other things too. That always makes me feel better.

Sunday we were running a little late, so we didn't make it to Sunday School (it is at 8:30), but because of that we had time for breakfast before church. After church we went to our favorite Mexican restaurant for lunch and still made it home before noon (early services are nice in some respects.) I cleaned up some, because my mother and stepdad were coming over on their way home from the beach. They were stopping by so they could see the lake house with us, and also to give Z his birthday present (tomorrow is his birthday.) They came over around 2:30, and we drove over to the lake house. They really liked it! It was the first time Z and I had been inside of it, as I've explained before, but we're sold. In our price range, and after all the research we've done, we know this is the best house we'll find, probably. It's on 1/5 an acre, lake view, new construction, all brick, nice landscaping, sprinkler system, stainless steel appliances, fireplace (OK – we discovered it's actually electric, but it looks pretty nice), good closet space, etc. It's a lovely home, and it made me feel nice that my mother liked it too. Confirmation is always nice. We spent a long time in the house checking out everything, and I know that Z and I will feel comfortable making an offer on it on Friday.

After they left, Z and I went to Cracker Barrel for dinner, and it was so good – I love that place, and somehow (I guess because I had the "Sunday Dinner" special) it wound up costing us $2 less than our "cheap" lunch at the Mexican restaurant. Hooray.

We were so excited talking about all the new things we'll need for the house that we decided to go to Lowe's after dinner and start pricing things. Z studied the outdoor storage buildings in the parking lot (the lake house has no outdoor storage) to see what exactly was needed to duplicate one, then we went inside to price the materials. Thankfully, Z will be able to make one for about half price. (Double thankfully, I'm married to a man who can/will build things!) We looked at refrigerators that match the beautiful stainless steel appliances already in the house, blinds for the windows, paint colors, etc. It's so much fun to dream about all the possibilities. We're also focusing on upgrades – not just things that we would like, but things that would help us sell the house when we're ready for our next move. Z wants to put in a pretty tile backsplash in the kitchen, and things like that. We agreed that no matter what, if we get that house, all our Saturdays will be taken up for the next year! (And this with a completely move-in-ready house!) I really hope this one works out. I'm not sure if my little heart can handle another beautiful house being sold out from under us.

Windows

2008-09-18T17:24:00.000-05:00

Today I am thankful because:

1. I am feeling quite calm about the bar results, my test results, the house, everything. It could be because I'm listening to a cd called "Calming Massage" right now, but I think it's also because sometimes you just have to let go. That's very difficult for me to do, but what's done is done, and we can't change it now. When all you can do is wait, you might as well let go. So, we'll either get positive bar results in 8 more days and make an offer on the "lake house" or get not-so-great news and probably make an offer anyway. We've run the numbers based on our current salaries, so we know we can do it either way. So I've let go.

2. Today feels sort of like Friday because tomorrow we're going on a "field trip," if you will. My company is going to tour the Hyundai plant, and we're leaving at lunchtime. Yes, I know that's pretty dorky, but it's better than sitting at my desk all day.

3. This weather calms my mind and makes me a lot less restless. Fall is my season.

4. Z's diplomas are ready to be picked up! I am hoping they look great, and I know he'll be excited to get them hung in his office. (And I'm excited about the prospect of skipping the gym to go get them.)

5. My mother is coming over this weekend to celebrate Z's birthday and see the lake house. (I'm going to quit putting quotations around the lake house, because it's a fitting name, and I'm officially using it to describe that house now.)

Where I grew up, you could be outside or leave all the windows open, and it would still be silent. My mother's house is isolated, on top of a mountain, surrounded by acres and acres of woods. Ever since moving out, opening the windows is a last attempt at comfort. First of all, in dorms and apartments, there is no cross breeze. There are only windows on one side, so what's the point of opening the windows? It doesn't let you breathe in fresh air, and it doesn't provide any relief in the fall and spring months. Instead, the dorm or apartment would just get really loud. One exception was our nice apartment in Tuscaloosa. We were on the 3rd floor, so we usually didn't hear too much noise with our windows open, but then again, that was just a quiet apartment complex. Currently, we live in an apartment with about a hundred kids, and our apartment also backs up to the backyards of a subdivision with kids. Now, I like kids, but I do not like someone else's kids shrieking while jumping on a trampoline about 10 feet from my window. Also, I think I mentioned once before my downstairs neighbors and how they don't realize how loud they are when they're on their porch. At our old apartment, the floors of the porches were concrete. Here, they're slats of wood like a real porch. That means that when those people are on their porch, they might as well be on mine. This is one reason I can't wait to be in a house of our own, and the lake house neighborhood was extremely quiet. We've gone there 3 times to look in the windows (relax – it's vacant – it's a new construction), walk the property lines, etc. Each time we've been there, you hear birds, and… nothing else. Z and I both grew up like that, and it's been a very long time since I've experienced quiet like that. (Remember my next-door hillbillies? I know you do.) I crave a quiet porch swing with a magazine and a gentle breeze. That sounds like heaven. (And if God wants a lake in the backyard, so be it.)

Today was much better

2008-09-17T17:26:00.001-05:00

Today I'm thankful because:

1. Last night I was so upset after work (read yesterday's blog) that Z said we should get pizza and rent movies instead of going to the gym. Sounded like a good idea to me, so we just chilled at home, and it was wonderful.

2. This morning I had a conversation with my boss where I told she admitted she thanks God for me everyday and thoroughly appreciates my hard work. She said I was doing a fantastic job and my attitude and willingness to help is refreshing. Wow – who knew?

3. Because of that conversation, I mentioned that I'd been finding quite a few errors in our magazines, after they'd been printed. However, the head of editorial is very territorial, and I'd gotten in trouble before for catching mistakes before they printed. I pointed out that I have copy editing experience and would be more than willing to read all copy before it goes to the printer, and the two of them worked it out so that I can copy edit now. This is great because I will feel more useful, I won a battle, and they will see more of my skills.

4. The weather outside makes me happy, even though it's overcast, because it's cool.

5. I paid bills last night. I know: why would anyone be thankful for that? Well, first of all, I'm thankful that I can pay bills, but also I love the process of it. I don't pay bills online because I love sorting through the bills, writing checks, seeing tangible evidence of goods we've used and how much it all costs. I believe it helps keep me grounded with how blessed we are and how everything's turning around now that we've both had our jobs for a few months. We're getting back on our feet, and paying bills helps me stay grateful for it.

I really want a day to stay home to do laundry. For the past two days, I have started laundry in the morning before work, switched it to the dryer during the 25 minutes I'm at home for lunch, stopped the dryer, and began it again when I get off work (our dryer is broken and doesn't turn off automatically; you have to set a timer and physically stop it by opening the door.) I am a methodical person, in case you haven't picked up on that already (I am Methodist, after all), and I like to do things in a logical manner, but also as slowly as I want. I wake up early in the morning so that I have 20-30 minutes to read news, eat slowly, deliberate over my outfit, etc. I don't like to be rushed (hence all my posts about evenings spoiled by the gym). So I really don't like doing laundry like that. I would rather do 5 loads on one Saturday, but two days ago neither one of us had anything to wear to the gym because laundry hadn't been done in so long. The lesson here is that I like things to happen on my time table, but who doesn't, I suppose?

Ready to Go

2008-09-16T20:35:00.001-05:00

Today I am thankful because:

1. Last night when we were over at the "lake house" looking around, a neighbor walked over to talk to us. She had all kinds of useful information (like property lines, neighbors, whose pier is whose) because she and her husband have lived there since 1980. She was very nice, telling us all about the builder, the home, the neighborhood, etc. Z asked her questions about the lake, the property, the pine trees that we want to cut down (hey, I love trees and will plant some others in their place, but pines are too dangerous next to your home), etc. She was very helpful.

2. Today my family started talking about Christmas plans, which makes me very excited. I love Christmas!

3. I might be in a new house with enough time to decorate for fall (for a month maybe). That would make me very happy to have pumpkins on our front steps, etc. (I really use "etc." too often.) But there is honestly no point in decorating the apartment. Last fall, all I did was change the centerpiece to a pretty bowl full of bright, tiny gourds. It was beautiful, but here, it would just get in my way. Frown.

4. I am listening to Billy Joel's greatest hits at work. And next is The Mamas and the Papas – also greatest hits. You can't beat that.

5. Last night I got my new Southern Living magazine in the mail. This is my favorite magazine, and not just because I did an internship there the summer before I graduated (although it is pretty cool to recognize all the names on the masthead of a giant publication like that). It's just the quintessential journal for all things Southern. Classic recipes, sound gardening advice, pretty and easy decorating tips: it is information I can actually use, not just read about and forget. I love magazines, and I subscribe to about a dozen, but that is by far my favorite. Now if I only had a hammock to go read it in.

Before we went to the gym last night, Z and I wanted to go check out a new house we'd seen online. Pictures of houses online are so misleading. The photographer is either so tight to the house that they crop out the bright pink monstrosity beside it, or they take the interior pictures while hanging out a window so the rooms look bigger. It's easy to like a house online, but we go visit each house before we make our agent take us there, because chances are we will hate it, and we start to feel like jerks for making him drive us to homes that we immediately don't like. I mean, talk about wasting someone's time. So, anyway, we were headed to go find a new house, but we accidentally turned onto the wrong road, which took us close by the "lake house." So we decided to swing by and walk the property again. That's when we met the neighbor. She was so kind. God bless the friendly people who walk across the street to greet potential new neighbors.

After talking with that nice lady for a while and thoroughly inspecting the lot, we drove to the other house, which looked very nice online: 2-car garage, lovely landscaping, etc. But, alas, it is very tight with the other houses in the neighborhood. It still looked very nice from the outside, though, so we probably will get our agent to make an appointment for us to tour it. But I think our plan now is to wait the 10 more days until bar results and make an offer on the "lake house."

Once we'd seen both houses, we drove to the gym. We didn't get there until 7:00, which means we didn't get home until almost 8:00. Thankfully I cooked chili two nights ago, so we had leftovers and I didn't have to start cooking that late.

I talked to my mother after dinner and asked her to drive to Prattvegas (well, the "lake house" isn't technically in Prattvegas, but you can bet we will still call it that…) to see the house. We don't want to be in the situation again where we have to make an offer on a house that no one in our family has looked at yet. I want my mother, stepfather, brother, and sister to come see it with level-headed eyes, if you will, and give their opinions. So, if we do that next weekend, we want to get our agent to take us to the house sometime this week, considering we haven't even been inside yet. (Of course, on a shady day with no glares on the windows, you can see almost the whole house by peering through windows. It's a new construction, so it's not like there are window treatments.)

I have just had another "encounter" with my boss. She might be the absolute rudest person I've ever met, and I cannot stand the way she shouts at people. Usually it's not me because I try my hardest to just stay away from her. But about 5 times now (in less than 2 months) I have been on the receiving end of one of her tirades. She gets in your face and yells and shouts and waves her arms. All over nothing. There is never anything to get upset about. This time, it was because I'd given a stack of papers to a lady down the hall, not her, even though I was specifically told to do so. (Oh yeah, she's 65 years old and slightly forgetful, you might say.) It wasn't a stack of confidential papers, and they weren't lost. They were just sitting on the wrong desk for 45 minutes. She also shouts in front of lots of people whenever she gets the chance. This time it was in front of just two people, but it's a small building and I'm not kidding when I say she's the loudest person I've ever heard, so chances are good that the whole damn company heard her. She threw her pen on the table and shouted, "Why did you do that!?" I just stared at her in disbelief and answered, "You told me to." Well, she didn't like that.

I can't wait to get my test results back. I just refuse to believe that a job has to equal torture, that you have no choice but to put up with a crappy job. I would like to hold on to the hope that there is a job for me out there where I can be respected and even valued, where I can breathe easily without worrying about pissing off an irrational hot-head (that's 2 jobs in a row now), where I can prosper (yes, it would be nice if you didn't pay me the bare minimum) and grow (please stop making me do your grunt work; I'm more qualified to do your job than you are.) I don't want to hate my job! I want to love my job! I want to be inspired to do great work, not feel like I hate to survive the day and nothing more. I need to go back to the top and read my list again.

(I write this throughout my work day. This should explain the difference in my tone. My outlook changes with each long hour.)

Nice Weekend

2008-09-15T20:56:00.003-05:00

Today I am thankful because:

1. My test went very well! I was extremely nervous all morning, but out of 100 questions, I felt completely confident on the majority, and pretty sure of all the rest. I think there were only about 5 questions where I just took a guess.

2. We have expanded our house search to another county. We'd originally not looked there because we'd heard the Prattvegas school system was so much better, and although we don't plan on having kids in this first house, we don't want anything like that to damper our re-sell possibilities. We've noticed, however, that houses seem to be selling there just as well as in Prattvegas, and it's literally just across the interstate, so it's not a location problem.

3. I have someone at work with whom I can share my frustrations. I will miss her once I escape, and I hope she won't be far behind me.

4. Only 11 days until bar results (and approximately 5 weeks until my results)!

5. A new house we've found is closer to work and has a view of the lake… who knew we could afford a view of the lake? (I didn't say a water-front house.)

I had a pretty nice weekend. Friday, in order to cheer ourselves up about the house we lost, as well as discuss our other options, Z and I went out to dinner at Carrabba's. I love that place! We had a very nice meal talking over what was not perfect about the other house (there really were some things we weren't thrilled about, and it helped to point them out) and what our next move was going to be.

Like I listed above, we've decided to look in the neighboring county for houses. Prattvegas is pretty much in a bottom corner of its county, so there are two others very close by. It's not that we're looking farther away; we're just looking on the other side of the interstate. So, after dinner (and a quick trip to the pet store where I was horrified to watch 3 fish try to rip their brother to pieces) we went home and looked up a bunch of new houses to look at.

Saturday was exam day. I woke up with enough time to glance through my materials again, but mostly just time to get worked up. I obsess and get nerves on top of nerves in situations like that. But I arrived at the test site with plenty of time and waited in line to get in the door. It was held in a junior high's cafeteria, and it was packed. We had to sit on those stupid mushroom stools (as my mother calls them) which was ridiculously uncomfortable. We were allotted three hours, but I got finished in one. I left feeling very confident and generally good about myself and my new-found opportunities. Driving home, however, I looked over and there, in the next lane on the interstate, was my current boss. I started to laugh and had to fight myself back from rolling down the window to shout at her what I'd just done. Take that!

That evening Z went to a party for our friends. I'd already planned not to go because of the exam, and I was just happy to stay home for a while and read magazines that had been piling up. It was wonderful.

Sunday, Z and I took our list of homes and started the elimination process. Here's how we operate when searching for houses: run a search on our agent's site, save the best ones (maybe 20) to our "saved list," go through them again to delete any houses with too few square feet, too ugly kitchen, too small backyard, etc (now we're down to about 12). Then we get directions to each (that's the hard part – agents don't want you to have directions because they want to drive you there. So sometimes it's hard to find these places, since we haven't lived here that long, and we've never had anything to do with this new county) and drive there. This is the stage where we eliminate the most, because even if it has granite countertops and hardwood floors, we will hate living there if it's in a cookie-cutter neighborhood, or if all the houses are close enough to shake hands through the windows. Also, we eliminate it if there's a cliff in the backyard, or if the "deck" covers the entire yard. (Seriously, we've seen these – who wants a wooden yard?) S

o yesterday, for example, we started out with about 20 new listings on our saved list. We actually visited about 12. One of those is a possibility. One other was really nice, but it was in one of those brand new neighborhoods that looks like it was dropped out of the sky, and they're not done yet, meaning we'll have construction directly across the street. The house that's an actual possibility is pretty nice. It's a new construction, sits on about half an acre, and has a pretty decent view of a lake. It's not lake-front, but you can definitely see the water. And the back porch is covered, something the other house lacked. We have not been inside this particular home before, but in a different neighborhood we toured a home with the same floor plan. I liked that house a lot, but it had about 100 square feet less, and it was just too small. So, we sort of know what this one's like, even though we haven't been inside yet.

Regardless of where we decide to buy a house, the fact remains that we will be moving soon! I am more excited about this than I can begin to explain! This apartment has served its purpose nicely, but it is so much smaller than what we're used to. When we're at home at the same time (which is pretty much all the time) we are usually in the same room, simply because the kitchen, dining room, and living room are all the same room… If we want to watch different things on TV, whoever goes into the bedroom to watch TV has to shut the door. I hate "open floor plans."

Even though I hate moving, the only reason I hate it is because it's always been sort of sad. Think about it: I moved from home to college – that was sad; from college back home – well, home had changed; home to college and back a few dozen more times; to the good apartment in Tuscaloosa – not so sad, but still temporary; Tuscaloosa to Prattvegas – left good friends, left good job, left good apartment, yes, that was sad. This will be the first time I move into a place I'll stay in for more than a year. That's pretty exciting. I'm also glad that this move will be an in-town, not-in-one-day move. Hooray! That means we don't have to enlist a dozen family members to arrive at the crack of dawn and work non-stop all day while bickering and hurrying and dropping. And – the best part – we'll probably be there for at least three years!

Disappointment and Anger (unrelated)

2008-09-12T17:51:00.001-05:00

Today I'm thankful because:
1. It's Friday! This week has been painfully slow, and I'm so glad it's almost over.
2. Tomorrow is my exam. I can't say I'm "prepared" because I don't know how to prepare. There's no study guide, and all I can do is read about the things I think might be on the test. So although I'm not prepared, I'm ready.
3. Exactly 2 weeks until the bar results
4. Did I mention it's Friday?
5. I know that there is a better house out there for us.

You read #5 correctly. We did not get the house. I guess the other offer was just better, but I don't know how much better it could have been if it took them 3 days to decide. Anyway, I guess the search is back on.

I would not expect you to believe me if I claimed to not be disappointed. I'm trying not to be, but I can't help it. We'll be starting back at square one because every other house we had on our list was pretty much removed when we saw that house. They didn't measure up at all. Our agent is going to hate us because I just got a lot pickier. I won't be able to stop myself from comparing every other house to that one.

I've been thinking a lot about how often I move. One thing I hate about moving is all the address changing you have to do. For those of you who haven't moved recently, you have completely forgotten what a hassle it can really be. I have moved (or moved Z) so many times that I know I've probably lost all kinds of important correspondence along the way. From what I can tell so far, the Prattvegas post office seems OK, but the Tuscaloosa post office is completely incompetent. Not only do they not forward our mail, but they do forward other people's mail to us. The whole time we lived at our nice apartment there, I received some other woman's bank statements. Her last name was my maiden name, but the mail was not even forwarded from Z's old address. She lived on a completely different side of town, and somehow they decided she and I must be the same person. I always marked it "Please Forward" and stuck it right back in the mail. One time, I even circled her name and wrote in big block letters: JANA IS NOT THE SAME NAME AS JENNIFER. STOP FORWARDING THIS TO ME. Still, every month, without fail, there would be this bank statement with a yellow sticker at the bottom accusing me of not informing my bank of my new address. It wasn't even my bank! Go figure. Anyway, that's just one example. But I am a magazine maniac. I've always been interested in them, and I've worked in the magazine industry since before I even graduated, with an internship, so I love magazines. I have about a dozen subscriptions, and it takes a long time for an address change to be processed with them. Sometimes you can miss 2 issues of each because they print address labels so far in advance. So, it's very helpful to know your future address so you can submit your change as soon as possible because, for those of you who don't know, the post office doesn't forward magazines. Now, what kind of sense does that make? They will forward the wrong person's mail and even junk mail. But a magazine that cost money – that they don't see fit to forward? I can just picture the letter carrier when they get magazines addressed to someone who has moved. That would be like Christmas to them, because they'd just kick back in their white part truck-part moon mobile and enjoy my Southern Living, or Traditional Home, or whatever. That makes me sad.

It's a good thing that my exam is this weekend because I don't know how much longer I can take it here. I just got yelled at for misspelling a word which is clearly spelled in our own style guide created specifically for our company. I had been asked to proofread one of our new media kits. When I was finished, I was informed I'd spelled a word incorrectly, and when I argued that I'd spelled it per the style guide, I got yelled at that she'd had someone else look it up in the dictionary and it was spelled differently. So I asked, doesn't our personal, created-by-us/for-us style guide come first? She narrowed her eyes and hissed at me, not when I say it doesn't. WTF? I honestly said it doesn't matter to me one way or the other and walked out. I cannot stand her attitude. She is rude, disrespectful, and full of herself. If I wouldn't starve, I would have quit a month ago. (I stopped blogging about it for the most part because I started to feel too negative. But sometimes you just have to let it out.)

Unfortunately, after taking the exam, I think it takes 4-6 weeks before I know the grade. Time can't move fast enough for me right now, in regards to this exam.

Patriot Day

2008-09-11T17:26:00.001-05:00

Today I am thankful because:

1. I live in the best country in the world.

2. In this election, things are getting ugly, but today we're not Democrats or Republicans. We are Americans.

3. In seven years, another attack hasn't occurred, thanks to our fearless leader and his serious and prompt response.

4. There are some heroes among us willing to step up and fight for all of us who enjoy our freedom.

5. I believe we will never have to feel that fear and panic that we felt seven years ago.

Still no word on the house yet. Our agent called around lunchtime to say he hadn't heard from the sellers' agent yet. I take that as a good sign, but not too good, because I don't want to get my hopes up. He says he should be able to tell us something by this evening.

I just found out that a friend of mine from my old job (who is in a new job himself now) has been extremely ill for many weeks now and has just received a frightening diagnosis. Please say a little prayer for him. He's been out of work for over a month now in and out of the hospital. I hope he is well taken care of, financially, physically, and emotionally. My exam is Saturday.

I'm slightly nervous, partly because lots of exciting things are going on right now, and partly because there's a lot riding on this. I can't mess this up, because I can't bear the thought of not escaping this job! I try not to talk about it b/c I'm trying to stay positive, but it still sucks as much as ever.

The Longest Day

2008-09-10T17:24:00.001-05:00

Today I am thankful because:
1. We stayed true to our intentions last night making the offer. We didn't pay more than we would have if there were no other offers already on the table. We just offered what we thought was reasonable.

2. The job news in my latest entry! That would be incredible and unbelievably great if that worked out.

3. I had a fun and relaxing lunch with 2 people from work. (I used to lunch all the time with friends from my last job. Here I just want to escape, but sometimes it's nice to try to make better friends.)

4. All the support I've received during this exciting but stressful time has been so wonderful. I'm glad I have family and friends who care about me and are happy for me.

5. I know that whether we get this house or not (I didn't capitalize it that time) it is all going to be OK, and when it comes down to it, we will get the house we're supposed to get. I'm thankful I have that comfort.

Today has been some kind of stressful. I've just been on pins and needles waiting to hear from the Realtor. The latest we'll hear anything is Friday morning, I think, but I want to know! I've been trying to stay positive and tell myself that everything happens for a reason, etc., but the bottom line is that I am just plain hoping that this is the right house for us and that it works out. I've been trying to get my mind off of it today.

I went to lunch with two friends in "my department." (I don't really have a department. They're in advertising, although they're not sales. I'm marketing, but I just happen to sit in the same section of cubes with them, so they've become my friends.) One of them had a birthday last week, and we just now went out to lunch to celebrate. We drove to Prattvegas for Olive Garden. That is a brand new one so the servers don't hate their jobs yet, and it's downright pleasant. Lunch was wonderful, and it felt so nice to talk to them without whispering. Before we ever got our food though, one of them picked up her glass and it slipped right out of her hand and crashed down onto the bread plate. Those glasses are really thick and heavy, so of course the plate broke. Her drink spilled all over the place. She didn't get cut, and we were all laughing about it, but 4 managers started swarming. They moved us to another table while other people cleaned up. I think my friend was asked about 85 times if she was OK. (All this and they didn't even realize I am married to an almost-attorney [16 days until we find out] so I can't imagine how paranoid they would have been otherwise. How silly). Anyway, that was lovely, and I forgot about the house situation for about 45 minutes. I guarantee that was the only 45minutes of my waking hours today that I haven't been thinking about it!

Today was excruciatingly slow…

Slightly Overshadowed

2008-09-10T06:51:00.002-05:00

I forgot! Last night Z also told me that he had been in the offices of the people who do for his department what I am taking a test for. He asked them if they had any advice for his wife who will be taking the test this weekend. They said it had been such a long time since they took it that they didn't really have any advice, but they asked questions about me. At the end of the conversation, they told Z that one of their people was about to retire and that as long as I did relatively well on the exam, I could work there. What's more, they want to hire someone they can groom to take the hiring person's position within about 3 years. So, it was slightly overshadowed by all the house drama last night, but still excellent news!

Crazy Night

2008-09-10T06:34:00.002-05:00

OMG - Z got home from work last night and told me he'd just spoken with the Realtor and someone had put an offer in on the house. So we met our Realtor at the house again, did a much more serious walk-through including going in the attic, checking the floor for bad places hidden by furniture, etc. We ultimately decided to not let the other offer influence the money we were willing to spend, but to go ahead and offer what we would have anyway, just 20 days earlier than we wanted to. It was nerve-wracking for sure. We were at the Realtor's office until 10:00 last night. We offered what we felt comfortable with. Our Realtor really tried to make us offer full price, but we were just not willing to do that, even with another offer on the table. We have no idea what the other offer is (Z tends to think it's a friend or someone putting in an extremely low offer just to get us to act, since the seller's agent knew we existed and had asked to be alerted if another offer came in; then one came in the very next day...) but I'm hoping that the other people, if they were real and genuine, would have made a reasonable offer like ours. We, however, offered to pay a portion of closing costs, which, in case you're not currently buying or selling a house, is usually all paid for by the seller in this market. All we can do is hope that makes our offer slightly more attractive.

Our Realtor seemed to think there was practically no way in the world our offer would be accepted, and I hate that because this was supposed to be exciting. We never truly expected another buyer with this house, so we thought we could do the traditional offers and counter-offers, but that got all messed up, and I feel weird about it. I don't know if it's how I truly feel or if I'm just feeding off our Realtor's attitude, but I feel like we won't get it. Z feels like we probably will. We should find out today.

There's no way I'm getting any work done today...

2008-09-09T17:28:00.001-05:00

Today I'm thankful because:

1. Traffic was not an issue at all this morning, and that puts me in a much better mood by the time I arrive at work.

2. Z was able to find out how much the sellers of The House paid for it four years ago. This will help us at the negotiation table quite a bit.

3. Nobody got hurt during the scuffle outside of my office today (read below.)

4. We didn't have to go to the gym last night since Z went for a haircut after work and it wound up taking an hour.

5. I had a lovely phone conversation with my friend I used to work with in Tuscaloosa.

So around 11:00 this morning, or slightly before, someone went into the pawn shop located a block or two away from my office, and they stole something – or tried to, I'm not sure. Employees of the pawn shop chased the man all the way to our office building which is on top of a hill. People from my office started hearing shouts outside and two of our guys went outside to help wrangle the bad guy. They were pretty much just trying to keep him contained until the police could arrive. Well, I was unaware of all this, of course. My cube has a window out to the side of our building where no one ever goes. There's a steep embankment, and then a very busy street leading to I-65. The window's not on the side of the building where the door is, or the parking lot, so there is never anyone at my window. But all of a sudden I heard someone shout, "I'm gonna f*** you up, n*****!" I spin around in my chair to see a man jump off the embankment into the street. This is a busy one-way street leading to the interstate, but thankfully there must have been a red light for the traffic coming from downtown because there was no traffic. He fell in the street (it's a wonder he didn't break an ankle – it was like John Wilkes Booth leaping ungracefully to the stage) but got up and kept running. My department was huddled around the windows watching as 5 or 6 men were chasing him. It was madness! Then my phone rang and I had to leave the excitement, but I found out later that he ran onto the overpass across the interstate and – I suppose to keep the police from recognizing him from the description given – he threw his shirt and hat off the overpass onto the interstate (which I understand is a felony.) Then the police showed up and arrested him. Crazy. Last week there was a homeless man sleeping in the lawn next to our parking lot. You gotta love working in the city.

Playing it Cool

2008-09-08T19:31:00.001-05:00

Today I am thankful because:
1. We met with a loan officer and feel more convinced than ever that we should own The House.

2. I heard a very good and well-timed sermon yesterday titled Conquering Complaining. In short, change crappy situations if you can, but if you can't, get over yourself and be thankful for all the wonderful things in your life. I'm trying.

3. We went to a new Sunday School class and it was much more our speed with mature adults, a teacher who seems to be secure in his faith, and potential friends.

4. We had a good talk with our Realtor, who I think we can trust. He made me feel better about what we have in mind time-wise versus what people expect (and they jibe better than I thought they would).

5. Mostly I am thankful that Z and I are equally in love with this house. It's not that one of us loves it and the other is settling to make them happy. We are both genuinely excited about the prospect of this house being The House.

Yesterday we went to church and tried out a new Sunday School class. What a relief – it was so much better. That's a class I can see us enjoying and growing in. I think there are potential friends there, too. One couple invited us to sit with them in church, which was nice, considering the other classes we'd attended seem to be full of cliques.

The sermon was also very nice, as mentioned above. However, someone around me smelled horrendous and made it hard for me to concentrate (obviously I didn't Conquer Complaining while listening to the sermon – it takes longer than that). Also, some old woman kept shoving me farther and farther down the pew to make room for her tardy husband. (Yes, she literally shoved me. During a prayer.)

After church we had lunch and changed clothes to go house hunting again. We wound up seeing about 10 or 12 houses. Most of them were big fat "no"s. A few were kept on the list, pretty much out of my desire to be polite. But just The House remains on our real list. The others just do not compare – they aren't even close. The space, the price, the looks, the acreage, the location: it's all almost perfect. So we're feeling much more serious about it now. At first we were in love with it, but we had a dozen other houses on our list to go tour. Well most of those were really bad, some were OK-ish, but none were as great as The House.

In case you're not keeping up with the countdown (what's wrong with you?) it's still 18 days until bar results. So now it's just a tense wait…

We met with the loan officer today at lunch. We pretty much got the news we expected, except that starting Oct. 1st, the percentage required for down payment on our particular loan changes, and we'd be about 30 days late to take advantage of the lower price. But other than that, we were not surprised by anything, which is just the way I like it. Today was not an official pre-approval, but just a running of hypothetical numbers. She says the next step is to find a house. Of course, we have found a house, but – couldn't you tell – we're playing it cool.

House Hunt Continues

2008-09-06T22:11:00.002-05:00

Tomorrow we're going to look at more houses with our Realtor. So far pretty much everything is a no.

I'm home at 4:59!

2008-09-05T16:57:00.001-05:00

Today I'm thankful because:
1. This was a short week and – surprise – it's already Friday! I have never ever been so glad to reach the weekend as I am now. Especially after a day like yesterday when I was being completely disrespected. (And I left work at 4:15!)
2. We got in touch with a loan officer who has already pre-approved us for enough for any house we could want.
3. A woman at work let me know all the secrets to attending high school football games in Prattvegas, including just how early you have to show up in order to get a seat.
4. We don't go to the gym on Fridays!
5. Even though it took me about 5 minutes to thread a needle before I could sew two buttons on this morning at the last minute, I was still not late for work!

I meant to post this last night

2008-09-05T06:54:00.001-05:00

Today I'm thankful because:

1. I was able to pay off my whole credit card balance after Z received his reimbursement check yesterday. Let me explain: Z and I are both "no-balance" folks. We have both always paid off every cent each month, and not paying was not an option. But when we moved here and were unemployed for so long, all of a sudden the only option was to pay the minimum (the thought makes me cringe.) Then it grew and grew for four months. Then he had to put the entire Colorado trip onto his credit card, and he didn't get reimbursed until after the bill was due. So this was a huge deal. And I'm incredibly grateful that we finally got that check. (Especially because we will be getting approved for a loan for the house soon and don't need a huge balance on our cards…)
2. That house is still on the market.This weekend we are looking at tons of houses with our Realtor. Hopefully we see some more that we really like, just in case the other one sells in the next 22 days.
3. The days are starting to get a little bit shorter – I love fall!
4. Yesterday I finally got official notification that I am scheduled to take an exam for a job with the state (Public Information Specialist.) It's a little PR, it's a little writing and editing, it's a little marketing. I'm all around suited! The test is in two Saturdays.

Kitchen Duty

2008-09-03T20:22:00.000-05:00

Today I'm thankful for:
1. Z finally got his reimbursement check for his trip to Colorado (yes, it's been a month)! What a relief!
2. Today being hump day – almost the weekend again!
3. Making friends at work. I went to lunch with some women today, and I'm starting to feel more comfortable around them. It takes me longer than most.
4. Our ability to get Z's diplomas framed. Even though it was crazy expensive, they will improve the look of his vacant office and make him feel proud every time he sees them. I'm glad that as tight as things feel, we are still blessed.
5. The Prattvegas high school football team being pretty talented (they won some championship or other…) because this year we won't have the spare money to go to many, if any, Alabama games. This will hopefully make Z feel better, and it will let us become more involved with our new community.

I have volunteered for Kitchen Duty at work. Each month they ask for volunteers to be responsible for the kitchen ("break room" at normal workplaces) for the whole month. I figured this would let me leave my desk 10 minutes early each day, and earn brownie points too. So I'm in charge of turning off coffee pots, pouring out old coffee, wiping off counters, tables, stove, and microwave. I'm not saying this is a glamorous job, but, like I said, it's better than sitting at my desk. A weird twist to this situation is that nobody here uses daycare for their kids. The kids go to school and then miraculously show up here at work. Out of earshot from their parents. Running through the halls. Splashing water in the bathroom. And, you got it, watching cartoons and eating snacks in the kitchen. Around 3:30 or so each and every afternoon, at least 5 kids, sometimes many more, begin shouting and running and eliciting threats from their mothers. It's slightly less than professional. And it makes it more difficult to clean up the kitchen. Personally I think that they should clean up after themselves or, if they're too young, their parents should clean up after them. Wiping down the counters is one thing. Sweeping up crushed animal crackers at a workplace is another. This isn't daycare.

I got caught in the bathroom one day when one mother chose that particular room as time-out. I was standing at the sink washing my hands when I hear a loud shriek. I just rolled my eyes at the kids in the kitchen. Then the door banged open and an angry mother dragged her daughter AND SON into the ladies restroom to yell at them. She didn't care that I was there or that I desperately wanted out. Talk about awkward. Work something out with a family member if you can't afford daycare, or just work part time and quit at 3:00 each day, but in my opinion, bringing your kids to work really shouldn't be an option. It's too disruptive for other workers, and as the parent, you can't be focused on your job either if you're worried about the kids getting you fired.

Hillbillies Next Door

2008-09-03T07:27:00.003-05:00

Overheard through my bathroom wall at 7:04 a.m.:

"Hey! Bring me somethin' to warsh my ass!"

Seriously.

House Update and Labor Day

2008-09-02T17:31:00.001-05:00

Today I'm thankful for:
1. Gustav weakening slightly before hitting our coasts. Cuba bore the brunt, unfortunately, and broke it apart a little. It could have been much worse.
2. The next-door neighbor of the house we'd like to purchase. He offered to get his spare key and show us around when we went there without our realtor. He was kind.
3. Getting to spend Sunday afternoon with family and celebrate my mother's birthday
4. The price on that house we want dropping again. Who knows if we'll wind up getting it or not, but if we do, it will be an incredible price
5. Z's diploma finally arriving

am trying my darndest to not get too caught up in thinking about "that house." (It's already difficult to not say "our house." That's bad.) I am an intelligent person, and I know it's not wise to get emotionally attached to any particular house when house hunting, but it's hard not to get attached to this one. I haven't written about it yet, but it's perfect for us. We are so picky when we look at houses, and we've already denied 50 or more. So the fact that we think this one is perfect really means it's an amazing house. We have strict criteria, and this house meets it all. I won't go into the details because chances are good it will sell before we're ready to make an offer on it, but just know that it's beautiful, spacious, has amenities we never thought we could afford, and the price has been falling due to seller's desperation.

It's still 24 days until we get the Bar results back, and clearly we cannot make a move on any home until we know for sure that Z passed. If he passes, he gets a hefty raise (b/c then he will officially be an attorney of course). If he doesn't pass (I highly doubt that) we cannot afford a home right now and will have to wait until he re-takes the Bar in February. As long as the house is still on the market in 24 days, we'll just ask our Realtor to alert us if anyone makes an offer on it. Ideally we would like to be able to move Nov. 1. I'm hoping it will still be on the market because it's been there already for more than 2 months with no offers. I think most other people would have a problem with how far from the interstate/downtown it is, but that's perfect for us.

Believe it or not, there are other things going on besides the house hunt right now. This weekend (hooray for 3-day weekends) we celebrated my mother's birthday with the family. That was fun – we had tacos, cheesecake, and a four-layer chocolate dessert that I made. See Facebook for pictures. I love getting together with my family; they're the greatest. After that, we went to Z's parents' house. The stupid administration at his old school mailed his diploma there instead of to us (even after he called to confirm the correct address.) While there we picked up his undergraduate degree too, and we'll get both framed for his office soon.

Hope you all had a lovely Labor Day!

Thanksgiving, Thai Food, and Tackling Home Repairs

2008-08-29T17:54:00.002-05:00

Today I'm thankful:
1. that I got to visit with a beautiful black kitten before going to work – I just hope someone takes it in
2. for all the heavy rain last week. Even though other places were flooded, we really needed all that rain here
3. that we're able to finally start looking at homes after 6 years of apartments and dorms (it's weird to think I started college that long ago)
4. for our Realtor who seems friendly, funny, and laidback – and not like a pushy salesperson at all
5. that I get to go to Birmingham this weekend to celebrate my mother's birthday, and visit with my family

Last night I decided to make a dish I saw in my Rachael Ray magazine. The picture looked good, there were no ingredients listed that I don't like, and Z likes Chinese. So I decided to go for it. It was Coconut Curry Chicken. I bought all the ingredients and planned to make it for some day when I had a little extra time. Yesterday we got to the gym about 45 minutes earlier than usual, so I decided, tonight's the night.

I trim chicken (ew) and start cooking the rice. Next I open up my new spices, five spice and curry powder. I don't think I've ever cooked with curry before, and it smells pretty strongly, but I don't think too much about it. Next I cut the chicken in strips and toss with five spice, salt, and pepper. Meanwhile I heat olive oil and cook the curry for a minute, then add the coconut milk and cook until reduced by half. The smell got much more intense. I looked over at Z who seemed to be turning a little green. The same color as the curry and coconut milk. Hmm. I start to sauté the chicken. OK, the chicken looks good. Add the curry and coconut sauce to the chicken, stir, serve over rice.

Uh, it was not very good. It wasn't necessarily bad. But Z had had a very bad experience at a Thai restaurant once, and apparently that's the dish he'd eaten. (How was I supposed to know? Also, what do I know about Chinese vs. Thai? I thought I was making something he'd really like.) While he was having flashbacks, I was wondering how a dish that had taken an hour to prepare and had used such strong spices could taste sort of bland. It was just kind of disappointing. And the smell was overpowering (it's just a small apartment – the smell went everywhere.) Neither of us finished our plates. I didn't even keep the leftovers (and I don't throw away food.) I ripped the recipe out of the notebook I'd written it in and threw it away.

So tonight I guess we're going to get some new shelving and some plaster to fix my closet. Our apartment people can be difficult to deal with sometimes, so I suppose instead of asking they fix it since it wasn't secure in the first place (see pictures on Facebook of holes in sheetrock, not studs), it's easiest for us to just do it. (They still don't care that our office/guest bedroom is an oven. We suspect it didn't get insulated during repairs from significant tornado damage, but they won't admit anything.)

I'm so looking forward to this long holiday weekend. We're going to repair the closet, and putting stuff back into the closet will give me the chance to pare things down a little. Every changing season or so, I like to go through my clothes, shoes, purses, etc, and see what I can do without, what I don't wear, what's been washed too many times, whatever. Then I take a big trip to the Hannah Home or, if the stuff is still good enough to share and I just don't want it, I take it to an exchange with my family.

Every once in a while, my aunts, cousins, sister, mother, etc, bring clothes, shoes, picture frames, books, anything they don't want or need anymore. We all look through the stuff and take whatever we want and donate the rest. It's a good way to clean out the closets and get a "gently used" new blouse or pair of shoes at the same time. (And since we'll be moving again semi-soon, it's one or two fewer boxes we'll have to pack and lug to the new house.)

Crazy Night

2008-08-28T20:06:00.005-05:00

Z and I had the scare of our lives last night.

Two nights ago there was a tragedy in Z's hometown where two people he knew were found shot to death inside their house that was on fire. This has caused us both lots of uneasiness, obviously. We learned about it yesterday morning and have been really on edge about break-ins, security, random acts of violence, etc.

Fast forward to last night. We went shopping and got home around 8:30. We watched the Democratic National Convention, I read the paper, etc. We went to bed around 10:15 and everything was normal.

Not 5 minutes after we laid down, the biggest, loudest crash I'd ever heard jarred us both. My body tensed up and I grabbed Z's arm, terrified. I felt like ice water was running through my veins- the noise had clearly happened in our apartment. Quick side note: our next door neighbors have domestic issues. There have been lots of late night fights, shouting and banging, and once they took it outside in front of our door and ripped the cover off the fire extinguisher box during a scuffle. So, honestly, my first thought was that they had somehow come crashing through our dining room wall (Yes, that's how loud it was). I thought he had shoved her, he was drunk, she was bleeding, all kinds of horrible thoughts ran through my mind. The second thought I had was that the man had perhaps shoved the woman down the stairs outside, because the horrible crashing sounds lasted that long too. It's like the noise just would not stop. Z thought it sounded like 2 or 3 people had just knocked the front door in and were tripping and falling over it, while they rushed into the apartment, SWAT-style.

Of course, all of this took place within 10 seconds, and then Z raced over to the bedroom door, slammed it and locked it. In a panic (really, we were both completely panicked) he looked around for something heavy. There wasn't anything. I suggested he just grab the lamp, which is fairly large. But finally I handed him one of the candlesticks which are sort of heavy. Then he tossed me his cell phone with 911 dialed into it and went out to see who was in our apartment.

It turns out that the 10-foot long upper shelf in my closet (the guest room closet) had collapsed with all my clothes (10 feet is a lot of clothes), boxes of Christmas ornaments, extra books, office supplies, magazines, bills, paystubs, thank you notes, extra buttons, socks, extra toilet paper, extra bathroom supplies (lotion, shampoo), etc., etc., etc. (Remember that this apartment is smaller than our last one, and there's practically no storage. So when we moved in and unpacked, we immediately re-packed non-essential items and stacked them in both closets. "My" closet is actually the closet for the guest bedroom, so it is at the other end of the apartment.) Stuff had flown into the hallway, the guest bathroom, the office, everywhere. I guess it probably gave the people living below us a heart attack.

It took us 30 minutes just to pick things up. The shelf had been completely ripped out of the wall (it was not in any studs). There was sheetrock inside all my shoes and all over my clothes. We could not go back to sleep after that for a very long time. It was very frightening.

It made me start thinking about how random crimes do occur, and it is not a silly thing to worry about. It reminded me of a sermon we heard a few weeks ago about making plans without God. You can plan your life out however you wish, but if you're not seeking God's will it's in vain and doing you no good. You have to talk with God when you're making plans, and with my job and our house situation, we have been doing lots of planning and dreaming and wishing. I have not been seeking God's will as often as I was seeking my own desires, and although last night turned out to be nothing, we both honestly believed an intruder was in our home for a few moments, and no matter what, that will seriously scare you.

Once upon a time, I decided to keep a thanksgiving journal where I listed at least 5 things each day that I was thankful for. Somewhere along the way I stopped, but I'm going to pick it up again because I feel like I have been in a very negative place lately and really need to focus on all the good in my life. Z and I are very blessed and fortunate, and we should really be expressing more gratitude. So I'm starting right now.

Today I am thankful:

1. that no burglar was breaking into my apartment last night

2. for the roof over our heads, 2 perfectly capable cars, 2 jobs with benefits and security

3. for our wonderful, loving, generous families who have given us so much support our whole lives, but especially over the past couple of years when we've gone through so many life changes

4. for kind friends who want to keep in touch with us even though we've moved far away from them

5. that, thanks to Z's new job and kick-butt benefits, my monthly prescription is now only $10 (really, coming from my last job which had crappy benefits, that made my day)

Now, a lot of those were generalities, but my self-imposed rules state that I can't list the same things twice, so from now on I will be getting much more specific, like numero uno. I may not blog about it everyday, but at least in my head, I am going to count my blessings and try to stop dwelling on the things that are less than stellar. I encourage you to do the same today and notice how many great things you've been overlooking.

So far today

2008-08-26T19:42:00.003-05:00

It is 7:45. We just got home from the gym. I already have laundry going, the dishwasher is washing, I went to the grocery store immediately after work and got home in time to throw on my workout clothes. My shins hurt, my back hurts, my sports bra is too tight. I am hungry. I don't feel like going into the kitchen to make tacos. Also, I want to take a shower but don't want to stand. Don't want a bath. Ugh. I am hungry.

I guess the tacos won't make themselves.

This Morning

2008-08-24T11:06:00.002-05:00

Well, today didn't quite get started the way we'd planned. The church we've been going to has pretty early traditional services, so we go at 8:15. We arrive this morning though to see that all services had been cancelled due to a power outage (thanks, Fay). So, we decide to go try out the new IHOP in Prattvegas. Well, it's not open yet. There are 3 Waffle Houses here, and we drove to each one but found each one to be entirely too crowded. We were up for a quick bite to eat, but not a 30 minute wait for one. We also tried Cracked Barrell, but their power was out too. So, we came back home, and I started lunch sort of early. I'm making parmesan oven fried chicken, wild rice, and garlic cheese biscuits. Nice comfort food for a cool, wet Sunday.

We're still planning on meeting with the realtor though.

Seeking Permanence in Prattvegas

2008-08-24T07:23:00.003-05:00

Well, semi-permanence anyway. Today is a big day - we are meeting with a (not-yet-our) real estate agent for a trial run and to view some houses. We gave him a list of our musts and our sure-would-be-nices, and he sent us several very reasonable houses to visit. We'll be meeting up with him today after church, if Tropical Storm Fay approves, to see the houses. Even though it's a little soon for us to be seriously talking about buying a house, we do plan on letting our soon-to-be agent see what exactly we want, what we can live without, and what we won't accept. Our goal date to own a house is Nov. 1 because our lease here is up Nov. 15. We'll see how it goes.

TGIF

2008-08-22T17:09:00.001-05:00

Seriously.

Playing Catch Up

2008-08-15T06:41:00.002-05:00

It's been too many days since I've posted anything, but I have just not had the time for anything extra lately. Quick catch-up: last Friday the lawn service at work broke my windshield. That night Z and I had a great dinner at Carraba's and shopping at Kohl's. Unfortunately, they really only had fall/winter clothing, so it's all sweaters, etc. Saturday Z's parents came over to visit. We went to Ryan's for lunch (it was yucky) went to a flea market (even yuckier) then to the giant mall in the big city. Good times. That night Z and I spontaneously decided to go to Six Flags the next day. You have to understand that there was no room for spontanaiety before - law school, constant studying, prior commitments, bar exam, more studying, etc. Anyway, the decision itself was exciting. The trip was even better. Somehow, we had never been to Six Flags together, so it was lots of fun to be there. Also, whenever we do something fun, like a trip or vacation, we're usually with family or friends, so it was great to just spend the day together, alone. We "swung by" my house on the way home from Atlanta to see all the upgrades their making to the house. New granite countertops installed last week - they look great. We didn't get home that night until about midnight, which made for a very sleepy start to the work week. This week has been about the same in level of boredom, underappreciation, and frustration. But I'm trying to stay a little more positive about it (or at least not voice my negative feelings) because it only makes me feel worse. I'm still looking for other things, and even holding out for things I'd applied to before. Time-wise this week I've been going crazy. Each night has been so busy. Since we commute, and don't work in Prattvegas, it's sort of late when we both get home from work. Then we change clothes and go to the gym. By the time we get home and I start cooking dinner, it's usually about 7:00 or 7:30. That means the kitchen is not cleaned up before 8:30, and if there's anything else we needed to do, we better hurry. Last night we didn't start eating until about 8:30, and I had to make a banana pudding for a party tonight. So, besides when I sat down to eat dinner, I didn't get off my feet until 10:15 when I fell in bed. Maybe that doesn't sound so bad to some of you, but I need my 8 hours, or at least close to it. I get up really early in the morning (always have) because I like to have plenty of time and not feel rushed, so I'm really tired by the end of a work week.

This weekend will be a busy one too: tonight we have a work party with Z's people. Saturday we are going to Tuscaloosa to visit with (in this order) Z's aunt and uncle who will be in town from N.C., my friends from my old job (yay!), and then my other great friend who we left behind. She has a new boyfriend that we haven't met, so that should be fun. That will be alllllllllll day long, but it will be worth it. I haven't seen any of them in a long time.

I guess I should go finish getting ready for work now, but I have to give that update before I forgot again. Now I just need to find the time to catch up on reading everyone else's blogs!

Silence

2008-07-29T22:10:00.003-05:00

Tonight is the last night of bar studying.

Z and I became best friends during the last several semesters of college, but we didn't start dating until one month before his graduation. Thus, from the moment we were a couple, our relationship has revolved around law school. That first summer the problem was that we didn't know which law school he would attend. Then he started school and we were dealing with a long distance relationship, both of us loaded with schoolwork (I was taking my senior courses), and lots of stress about the unknown. We went through 3 years of him dealing with difficult classes, unfair grading policies, the constant struggle of finding a job, literally hundreds of interviews, both of us broke as can be. Last summer we spent apart while he had two different internships. We had months of uncertainty where we didn't have a clue where we would be living or what jobs we would have. When graduation finally rolled around we moved. Of course, that's where my blog picked up, so you know about the waiting and the anxiety. We went through his prep courses and his long days of endless studying. My living room has been piled high with text books, and literally every single conversation we've had has sooner or later been about the bar exam.

Yet tonight I sit here in silence while my husband studies for the last day of the bar exam. I can't believe this is almost over. It has been a constant in our relationship since the beginning. It has been a huge stumbling block for me personally as it has meant many days of self-centered pity parties. There have been many times I've felt neglected, although I know he is not doing this for himself, but for us and our future. I remember that first semester he was in law school. He woke up at 4:00 every morning to study before going to classes all day and studying all night. Neither of us knew what we were getting into. The summer before he started school there, I had a panic attack I suppose on the interstate. With all this turmoil we have been one another's rock. I know that sounds cliche but it's so true. And although I'm not naive enough to think all our troubles are over, it's overwhelming to think this one is almost in the past. It is almost in the past.

Although we won't know the results from the bar exam until late September, I'm 100% convinced that he will pass. Once he returns from Colorado, we will begin our house hunt again. It seems like everything has been put on hold by law school - a huge, impossible hurdle which he will jump tomorrow. After tomorrow our lives can go on. He will receive his promotion and be an actual attorney (well, after September when results come back). I am now employed. Things are back on track.

For some reason it is usually during emotional times like these that I think of my dad. I think about how he would be proud of us. He never really got to know Z, since he was really sick by the time they met. They only were together 2 Christmases, if I remember correctly, and not too many other occasions. But I believe that he approved of Z and would be very proud to see how far we've come. We had certainly had our problems, and I like to think he would be happy to see me happy. Isn't it sad that you never know what to say to someone until you can't? I think he would tell me he's proud of us both.

Day One

2008-07-28T17:48:00.002-05:00

Day one of the bar exam: Z said it was the easiest law school related exam he's had. I'm so grateful for all those weeks of non-stop studying, just so he can feel that confident and not scared at all. The test itself is still nerve-wracking and awful, but walking out, I thank God he doesn't have to be worried when he's walking out.

Have to check on the rice on the stovetop.

I Didn't Touch Your F******* Drum Set!

2008-07-26T21:08:00.002-05:00

For those of you who don't recognize that quote yet, you must go see Stepbrothers, the new Will Ferrell/John C. Reilly movie. Hilarious. OK, in a very immature kind of way, but if you cracked a smile at Knocked Up, 40 Year Old Virgin, etc., or if you even remotely like Will Ferrell, you will love this movie. I laughed so hard it hurt.

Today I drove to my sister's house and we went to lunch, did a little shopping, then went to see this movie. We had a good time together, and ended up at Coldstone Creamery, even though it was rainy outdoors and almost chilly indoors. You just can't pass up the Coldstone.

Wednesday night cannot, CANNOT get here soon enough. On Wednesday night the bar exam will be over and I will have my husband back, and he will have his sanity back. Unfortunately, Friday morning (early) he leaves on a work trip to Colorado for several days. But after that, we will finally be able to have a real conversation (where I can actually believe he hears what I'm saying), think about possible houses again (put on hold during this horrible bar preparation time), and consider my job possibilities again (dreaded task).

The guy who interviewed/hired Z is not truly his boss, but I think it's common knowledge that another guy is leaving, and he will soon be the boss. Anyway, we went to that guy's home last night for dinner. Delicious food and good company. After starting off the week with an extremely immature Sunday School class of newlyweds (all seemingly 18 years old) and then spending all week at my new job, it was nice to hang out with actual adults and have intelligent conversation.

So tomorrow we are trying a different Sunday School class. Apparently there are enough "newlyweds" (how many years are we going to count?) in the church to warrant having two newlywed classes. From what I understand, it used to just be the one class, but the older couples tended to dominate the conversation and the younger couples who seemed to the teachers to be new in their faith needed more one-on-one time. So they split the class, and it just so happens that Z and I accidentally picked the wrong one. Age-wise I think we might have been in the right class, but otherwise it wasn't a good fit. We seemed more mature than the others and although they were nice and friendly, we didn't feel totally comfortable, so tomorrow we'll be trying the older version of the class. I guess if that doesn't work, we'll be headed somewhere else. The church only has about 50 Sunday School classes for adults.

Say a little prayer for Z if you think about it. We're both confident that he will do well on the exam, but it's still a huge, life-changing event, and a 3-day marathon. So, needless to say, he's stressed.

I Just Have to Shake my Head

2008-07-25T06:34:00.002-05:00

Well, today is Friday, thank goodness. This has been a week of realization, incredulation, and dread. Just kidding, it's not that bad. But I'm so happy the week's almost over. I heard through the grapevine that someone I know who used to work there years ago had the same thoughts I do about the place's shortcomings. That makes me feel so much better and less paranoid. I was beginning to think I was the crazy one to feel out of place. But this person had the same problems I do with fitting in with people, learning the assinine rules, and staying sane. It's a wacky place, to be sure.

Yesterday I drove all the way back home during my lunch hour just to escape. That left only about 25 minutes at home, but it was worth it, and I'll probably end up doing that each day.

Tonight we are going to dinner with Z's boss. Talk about nervewracking. That's not exactly a relaxing way to start the weekend, but you never know, he could be lots of fun, and he might even be able to help me out with my present situtation!

The bar exam starts on Monday and ends Wednesday, so please keep us in your prayers. (Yes, us. These kind of things take a toll on the spouse too. I can't wait to have my husband back and be able to discuss something besides torts, contracts, and civil procedure.)

Not so Hooray?

2008-07-21T20:05:00.003-05:00

Well, today was my first day. Talk about disorganized - my new company is in the dark ages as far as offices go. Really, you walk in and think you're in 1978. The carpet, the cubes, the decor, the bathroom (!), the hairstyles, etc. Seriously, it's a bit rinky-dink, for lack of a better term.

I'm slightly disappointed. Not necessarily hating it, but it's not going to be quite as nice as my last place. So the job wasn't so great before, but the people were wonderful, and the atmosphere itself was OK. The building had at least been brought up to code, and I might have been in a cube, but at least it was semi-private. Now I'm in the middle of the room, with my back to the door.

The new place doesn't even have an HR department. It has the one woman who apparently runs the whole show. And she still hasn't told me my salary. We discussed it vaguely during the interviewing/hiring process, but we have not decided on a specific amount yet. And when I asked her about it again at the end of today, she waved me off and said, "Oh, we'll talk about it tomorrow."

Also--I so took this for granted at my last job--I have to clock in - 3 times! There are 3 different systems to keep up with time, even for salaried employees. First, you clock in with your fingerprint (misleading, because that's the only piece of real technology in the place), then write on a sheet of paper what time you came in so that the receptionist knows at a glance who's in the building (this is because there are no individual phone lines - all calls go through the receptionist...don't get me started), then you have to keep a time card at your desk and turn it in every two weeks. All this, and I'm probably getting a pay cut, which I frankly thought was financially impossible!

And, when I go to lunch, I must tell the do-everything woman so that she knows exactly when to expect each person back. We are expected to take the same lunch hour everyday. It can be whenever you choose (11:00, 12:15, etc.) but it must be the same hour each day. Huh? Couldn't she just call and if I don't answer, leave me a message?? I mean, my fingerprint, list at the front desk, and time card will all prove I didn't stay gone longer than an hour - why would she need us all to check in with her? So I guess I stand corrected: there are 4 methods to keep up with my hours. Ugh.

Also, I have no job title or description. All day long I heard, "Oh, and I might ask you to help me with this. And this. And this." Now, anyone who knows me knows I don't mind responsibility, as long as it is RELEVANT. But these were totally random items like, I might need you to answer the phones during lunch, or volunteer to clean the kitchen, or make travel arrangements for people. Seriously. What does that have to do with me? And then when people found out what I used to do at my old job, they immediately linked me with the woman who does that for this company, saying, "Oh, well, you have experience with that, so you can help her." Excuse me, but was I hired to be her assistant? Why would I help her with that? She's been doing it for 35 years. I did it for 10 months. I bet she's fine. And I have my own job! It's as if I'm expected to continue doing everything that was on my resume from the past. "Oh, I see you were once a writing tutor. So I'll expect you to edit all my emails before I send them out..."

And we're only allowed to use the Internet for personal reasons twice a day for 10 minutes at a time. And we are to limit personal phone calls to 2 minutes. Here's how I feel about that: if I am hired to do a job, and I do that job, I'm going to take as many 10 minute breaks as I need to stay sane. If I'm salary and will occasionally have to stay late with no extra pay, then I expect to be allowed to stay at lunch 10 minutes late sometimes without penalty. If my work is good, my attitude is good, I'm not MIA at weird times during the day, and I don't smell like pot - leave me alone. Otherwise, I am mature enough and responsible enough to know when I should not be checking my email or chatting away on the phone. That what I went to college for - to know how to act in society. (I feel like George Costanza: "Ya know, we're living in a SOCIETY here!")

With all that being said, it is NOT that bad. I was just expecting so much more. I mean, realistically, the place is at least 5 times smaller than my last office, and it's run by 3 people who have been there since the 60's, so I should have expected them to be outdated and a little clueless. But really - no eating or drinking at our desks?? Sometimes I want a freaking pack of crackers at 3:00 in the afternoon and I don't want to fingerprint out and go sit in the break room for 10 minutes...

(Also, I would just like to point out that I was asked to show up 30 minutes late this morning so that everyone could get there before me and get my paperwork ready. I had no idea I was going to be hourly for the first 90 days, so I would like those 30 minutes back please.)

Z and I originally thought we could carpool, but that would mean, in order for him to be at work on time (downtown traffic can be a real bitch) I would have to be at work probably 30 minutes early, and leave 30 minutes late. And sometimes I'd be stranded for lunch. I realized today I'm not going to be spending ANY extra minutes there. [The reason he would be the one dropping me off and stranding me is because he will be receiving a state car. His department actually has money.]

So, I'm not giving up. Tomorrow will be better and the day after that will be better. But, here's the honest truth. I was underpaid and underappreciated at my previous job. If this turns out to be a step backwards, it is not going to last. At least I had really great friends at my other job, and that made it OK. Now there is only one person semi-near my age. Everyone else is either in highschool (only about 3 people I think, out of 32) or 50+ and that is proving awkward.

I guess we'll see, and I'll definitely keep posting about it.

HOORAY!

2008-07-19T18:39:00.002-05:00

I'm freakin' employed!

My interview was at 10:30 yesterday morning, and by 4:30 they'd called to offer me the job! I will start on Monday. The interview went very well (obviously), and although I think the office atmostphere is going to be very different (less professional) than my last office, I think it might be a good opportunity to gain new skill sets and become more marketable. How fortunate, since my new title is Director of Marketing.

After my interview, I went to lunch with Z, then went back to his office to brainstorm on how to decorate. His office is so large (I'll be in a cubicle again...) that it needs lots of help.

Then I went home and stayed on the phone all afternoon with my sister, brother, and friend, until the publishing company beeped in to hire me.

After Z came home, we had dinner and then went to a baseball game. The baseball team here is named the Biscuits, and they were playing the Birmingham Barons, so it was hard to decide who to cheer for. It was Elvis night (I have no idea why), which was interesting. There was an impersonator and lots of Elvis songs all night. It was lots of fun, and the weather was quite surprisingly mild (it helped that the stadium is right on the river).

This morning we got up early to go to the store and purchase lots of things for Z's office - plants, planters, a mirror for the back of the door, frames for some pictures, desk decor, etc. Then we went downtown to his office to decorate. It took FOREVER and we got lots of strange looks from security (his building is the Criminal Justice building), but the office is really starting to look great. Now when he gets his diploma in the mail and we can hang it, it will look even better.

We came back to Prattvegas for lunch, and then I went clothes shopping for my new job. Not as much fun as I'd hoped. First of all, both my mom and sister were busy today, so I went shopping alone. I hit Belk first, because they're moving locations and were having a huge sale. It was already incredibly picked over, though, and all I found was one shirt and two purses. Then I went to Goody's (my goal was not to leave Prattvegas again). There I got jeans. Not for work, I realize, but I needed them... Next I went to Cato's next door and found a skirt, a pair of shoes, and two tops. Finished up with Target with 2 pairs of Isaac Mizrahi pants. When it's a trillion degrees outside, it is really exhausting to try on a trillion different outfits.

Now I'm home and really tired. Tomorrow we're going back to the church we visited last weekend and liked pretty well. We'll see how it goes tomorrow. Z and I think Sunday School should be at 9:45 and church at 11:00, but apparently nobody does that anymore, and this church is the worst! Their Sunday School classes are split into two times, so that you choose when you go to Sunday School, and when you go to church. There are 3 services (2 traditional) at 8:15, 9:30, and 10:45 with Sunday School during the first 2 services. The only SS classes that pertain to us are during the 9:30 service, so we'll be attending church at 8:15. That's so weird. Last week we got home and took a nap before lunch...

Interview

2008-07-17T21:38:00.002-05:00

I've got a job interview tomorrow morning! It's with a publishing company very similar to the one I just left, although it's much smaller. Regardless, I'm hopeful, and I'll post the outcome, of course. Wish me luck!

So Sore!

2008-07-16T21:01:00.003-05:00

I haven't posted in a while because I've been utterly exhausted. Last week, Z and I joined the Y, and we've been working out pretty often. We've been going to use treadmills/weight machines in the evenings (I only use the treadmill), and I've been going to Pilates class on Tues/Thurs, but on Monday of this week I decided to try out the aerobics class to see how I liked it. I didn't.

It was not just an aerobics class; it was a step class. And it was excruciating. There was no warm up or cool down period. Seriously. It was just nonstop, and I am nowhere near in shape enough to do that. Needless to say, yesterday and today, I have been incredibly sore in my calves. Walking around after sitting is painful, but going up and down our apartment stairs (especially with armfulls of groceries) is atrocious.

This past Sunday Z and I visited a new church, and it seems like it might be a much better fit for us. It is much more traditional (I think I've mentioned how we feel about contemporary services) and it's large with a thriving social scene. We meant to go to Wednesday night services tonight but wound up meeting my brother halfway between Prattvegas and Montevallo for him to bring my official transcript to me. We had a lovely dinner.

I needed my transcript because I'm applying for a job and they requested it. I will have to overnight the application package tomorrow because the job opening officially closes this Friday, and I just found the posting this morning. Oh well.

It is almost time for the Bar exam. I don't know if the B should be capitalized, but it sure as heck feels like it. Only 12 more days until the first day of testing. I cannot wait for this to be over. Z studies an average of 9 hours every singly day, and he is constantly stressed about one factor or another. He can't relax until it's over, but two days after it's over (it's a 3-day exam) he is headed across the country on a business trip. So it'll be mid-August until he's calm again, probably.

Maybe sometime soon I'll have some exciting news, like a new job! You never know.

Pilates

2008-07-08T19:19:00.002-05:00

So I went to pilates this morning. I was the first one there, so I sat on a couch and read a magazine until people started showing up. There were only 6 other people, plus the instructor, so when we paired up, I had to be partners with the instructor. The class was good though - sort of relaxing, sort of challenging, sort of out of my comfort level (I didn't know anyone else), and sort of rejuvenating. After the class, the instructor talked to me for a while and complimented me, which felt nice. I was able to do more of the advanced moves than anyone else in class (of course I was the youngest one by at least 45 years), and I left feeling great about myself. Now it's almost 7:30 at night and I can start to feel the soreness taking effect. That's OK though. The next class isn't until Thursday. Once I get a job I won't be able to attend 8:30 am classes, so I better enjoy it while it lasts.

Improvements

2008-07-07T22:39:00.002-05:00

It is very easy to become depressed when you're unemployed. I can only imagine how it would be if I'd lost my job, because it's depressing enough when you're unemployed because of your own will (sort of). For the past two months, I have struggled with issues from having no job. I made really good friends at my last job -- friends I still keep in touch with and still miss. So leaving them was really tough. When Z didn't start his job until a month after he should have, I felt a ton of pressure on me to find a job. It was (cliche warning) sort of hard to get out of bed in the mornings. I'm the type of girl who doesn't leave the house without her makeup on and her hair fixed, but I started wondering why I even bothered when all I did was sit around the apartment all day cooking or cleaning or generally feeling like a loser. Some days I didn't even change out of pajamas. That really starts to get a person down.

But all of that is changing now. Z has finally started his job, the bar exam will be over soon, tomorrow is his last night class, and yesterday we joined the YMCA. During college, I took a series of yoga, pilates, and aerobics classes, and joined that with walking with my friends almost every morning. During those 3 or 4 semesters (the time I met and became best friends with Z) I lost tons of weight. To the point where my family didn't like it and told me I was too skinny. After I graduated though, I lived in one town after another where I wanted to find a class, but it was always one inconvenience after another. And I gained weight. And I started planning a wedding and got totally stressed and got married and had financial problems, and supported my husband when his schoolwork was more important than him having a job, and had to quit my job and move when neither one of us wanted to. I gained weight. I started to hate looking at myself in the mirror, clothes shopping, or even getting dressed in the morning. My self esteem just got completely zapped and I knew that hating myself was the next step if I didn't do something.

Z feels sort of the same way about himself (although he's not a girl, so there's probably not the same self-loathing involved), and we both just want to feel better and look better. So we'd discussed joining the Y for a while, even before we moved here. It's just so expensive, initially. The monthly cost is not that much, but there's a start-up fee of $100, plus the first month. Anyway, we figured that unless we made a financial commitment, we wouldn't stick to a plan.

So, yesterday afternoon, after church and lunch, we toured the Y and picked up an application. We sat in the car, filled it out, returned it and worked out that evening. Then we came home, showered, etc., and after dinner we went to Wal-Mart for various things. While there, I got new nail polish, blush, and lipstick. It hit me that I'd never ever purchased lipstick. I have lip gloss of course, but never lipstick. Maybe it's shallow, but this morning when I put on my makeup, even though I had nowhere to go, I felt better about myself.

This evening, while I was cleaning up the kitchen after cooking dinner (parmesan oven-fried chicken -- very good), Z called and said his class had gotten out early and we'd have time to go work out together. We made it there around 9:00 and I did 2 miles on the treadmill. Tomorrow I'm going to take a pilates class.

I feel better already.

OMG

2008-07-03T20:00:00.002-05:00

I had several OMG moments today.

1. I think I may be developing cankles.

2. I almost couldn't control my rage at the bank tellers this afternoon.

3. The sweet potato souffle at lunch today was really not good.

4. Z is being sent to Boulder, CO at the beginning of Aug. to attend a conference, and all of the costs (over $2500) have to be applied to his credit card until after the trip when they reimburse him.

Samuel

2008-07-02T16:47:00.002-05:00

Last Thursday my friend had a beautiful baby boy named Samuel. Yesterday I got to meet him for the first time, and visit with her for the first time in over a week. (We used to work together, and I miss her immensely.)

I am so in love with baby Samuel. I spent 5 hours at their home watching, holding, feeding Samuel, and I loved every second of it. He is healthy, happy, and extremely blessed to have gotten two such great parents. They are both complete naturals, and the love they have for their new baby is overwhelming to say the least. What a blessing.

I didn't take any pictures, but my friend took a couple while I was holding him, and hopefully she'll email them to me when she gets the chance.

Wedding Weekend

2008-07-02T11:39:00.008-05:00

This past weekend, my aunt married a wonderful man. She'd asked me to sort of be in charge of setting up for the reception site and the rehearsal dinner site, so I got there on Friday afternoon and was on my feet all weekend.

I left Prattvegas at 8:00 Friday morning so I could have time to go to Pell City for a hair appointment, pick up my brother, and head for Atlanta. We had a lot of fun driving there, listening to Elton John's Greatest Hits and singing loud. Surprisingly enough, we didn't hit any bad traffic until literally 5 miles before our exit. We parked for about 10 minutes, with people getting out of their cars and looking hopeless. That was pretty scary because I did not want to worry the bride, as I was in her shoes not too long ago. I wanted her to feel completely confident that I would take care of everything I was supposed to take care of.

Little did I know, the bride herself was running way behind schedule. She was caught in traffic later on while picking up tablecloths, the set up team (my grandparents, aunt, etc.) and I were all kicked out of the church (where my aunt is a member) right before the rehearsal, so we had to return that night after the rehearsal dinner to finish set up for the reception.

My brother and I raced over to the rehearsal dinner site where we had exactly 1 hour to meet the caterer, set up tables and chairs, send someone to the grocery store, put out decorations, and clean up for guests. We had my aunt and uncle, another uncle, and a cousin and his wife to help us. Everything came together, but it was literally as the bride and everyone else were walking in the door. Whew.

After the rehearsal dinner, which was just lovely, we had exactly one hour to put away everything, clean up, etc., before we had to be out of the facility. Then we went back to the church to finish setting up. (And I'm sure if those kooky people knew it, they would have had us arrested.)

Wedding day arrived and was beautiful. We all went over to the church to see how we could help. I got to follow my aunt around carrying her train for a while, which was fun to have that time with her. It got HOT before the ceremony though, since the wedding was at 2:00, and I had to go in to chill before everything got started. Lots of extended family was there, and it was great to see everyone again.

The wedding ceremony was beautiful and nearly flawless (the preacher forgot the Lord's Prayer...), and then the reception was very nice as well.

Somehow I've gotten my formatting all mixed up, but the first picture is me right before the wedding. Then it is my brother and me at the Rehearsal Dinner, then of course my aunt the bride, then the bride and groom at the Rehearsal Dinner.

Excitement

2008-06-26T12:08:00.003-05:00

My friend had her baby this morning! I haven't seen any pictures yet, but I know he is beautiful, and I can't wait to see him.

Also, I forgot to write last night that another big event is my friend's news of a new job and moving to North Carolina. I wish him all the best, and I'm so excited for him.

Today will be getting ready for my weekend in Atlanta. I'm a checklist kind of person, so I have to make lists about what to pack, my timeline, directions to and from all the wedding venues, and multiple reminders. Otherwise I forget everything.

Early this morning our apartment complex tested the fire alarms. I know most people were probably awake already, but I wasn't. I felt like I was living in the dorms again. I can't wait to have a house.

Hooray for babies and at least some people getting jobs! (Z starts next Tuesday!)

What is wrong with me?

2008-06-25T21:38:00.002-05:00

It's been five days since my last post - gah! I thought I would be more dedicated than this. I mean, it's not like I have anything better to do.

Tonight is full of emotion. Tomorrow one of my good friends will be having a baby. Her C-section is scheduled for first thing in the morning, and I'm just so excited for her. OK, I'm crazy jealous too, but so so happy.

Also, my aunt is getting married this weekend, so Friday morning I'll be traveling to Hotlanta to help out with the festivities and celebrate.

I'll be getting my haircut on my way through Pell City. I'm trying something different, something I wanted to do right after the wedding but didn't have the guts. I've had a crappy haircut since the day before Z's graduation (great timing, I know), and I'm finally getting it fixed by my favorite hair person. She did my hair for the whole year starting with the day before my engagement pictures were taken to my wedding day. And I haven't seen her since. I've tried other people, but they have been a disappointment.

So, lots of changes coming up. But these are the kinds of changes I can get behind.

Finally, A Little Confirmation

2008-06-20T20:10:00.002-05:00

After at least half a dozen calls this morning, Z finally heard back from his future employer today and got the confirmation that he will be able to start his job July 1st, as long as the criminal background check, fingerprint check, etc., goes without a hitch. Finally. Seriously, we are so excited and relieved about this. The guy promised Z that one day he will explain what all this - all this seriously sketchy behavior was about.

Tomorrow and Today

2008-06-19T22:20:00.002-05:00

I am excited about tomorrow. Lately I have been bored, so, partly I'm excited to just get out of the house, but the main reason tomorrow will be great is because I am going to T-town to visit with my old work friends. We're going to lunch together and it's going to be wonderful.

Today I intended to get a new haircut, but that didn't work out, so maybe next week. I did go to the grocery store though, and had the most fun I'd had all week, because Food World was having an awesome sale. Everything was on sale, and they had snacks and games. I won a 12-pack of Coke just by spinning a wheel. I wound up saving over $25 with all the discounts and everything, so that was cool.

See what my life has become?

Reading

2008-06-17T20:21:00.002-05:00

For those of you who don't remember, I was beyond burned out when I graduated college. Being an English major, my life was reading and writing. I loved it, mostly, but by the time graduation rolled around, I hadn't read for pleasure in a long time, and it was hard to get back into the swing of things.

Also, I was concerned with job hunting back then, and my fiance lived so far away from me that I felt like I was constantly driving. Then, I moved to Tuscaloosa, got a job, got very busy with that job, and was consumed by wedding planning. Then I was moving again before I knew it. Now I have lots of downtime and I've finally started reading again. When I say I didn't read before, I mean that I probably read what most adults read -- a little bit. I have always loved magazines, and I would read the occasional novel, but it took a long time. That's not normal for me. I used to devour books, and I'm finally there again.

Since I've moved to Prattvegas, I have read The Prince of Frogtown by Rick Bragg, Wigfield by Amy Sedaris and various other authors, Down and Out in Paris and London by George Orwell, Devil in the White City by Erik Larson, and am now working on Soldier's Pay by the great Faulkner. (To be fair, I started that one last winter but it somehow got forgotten.)

Now that's more like it.

What are you reading?

Thankful

2008-06-17T14:27:00.003-05:00

I almost forgot to say anything: we think Z will be starting his job at the first of July, but we have not received an official call from anyone with any authority. It was just news from the buddy who's been helping out. So, we still aren't sure.

I would just like to take this opportunity to point out that we have lost so much money by me quitting my job an entire month earlier than I had to, and by him not starting his until at least a month later than we intended.

Thankfully (seriously, I am so thankful) we have sort of gotten a financial windfall. First of all, our new apartment was running a special that waived the security deposit and administration fee of moving in, but we of course received our old apartment's security deposit back. Then, I got a check I'd been due for several months from my old job. (But if I'd gotten it several months ago, it would have been long gone of course.) Then Z sold his boat. That helped out a lot. Also, it's been pretty helpful that since I have no job, I don't use any gas. Z has night classes in Montgomery, so that's about a 30 minute drive, but only one of us driving has been good. Also, my birthday and Z's graduation brought monetary gifts from lots of people, and that was excellent. Somehow, lots of our utilities charged us the wrong fees within the same month, so we had lots of credits on our accounts and lots of rebate checks all show up at once. Seriously, I truly believe that God doesn't give us anything we can't handle, and it has been very helpful to have all of these things occur at one time. Things can seem crappy sometimes, but they are never as bad as I think, and there is always so much to be thankful for. So, check your attitude. It might need an adjustment like mine does.

It's Been Awhile

2008-06-16T21:54:00.002-05:00

I've been MIA for several days. Mainly out of laziness I guess, although this weekend was extremely busy.

Saturday I did something that has been a long time coming. My siblings and I went to my grandmother's house (my father was living with her before he died) to remove my father's "estate" and divide it amongst ourselves. The estate mainly consisted of antique furniture: large wall clocks, mantel clocks, marble-top tables, a beautiful roll-top desk, chairs, etc. The reason I say it was a long time coming is because he died January 15, 2007. He had a will that clearly stated that his estate was to be divided amongst the 3 children, but my grandmother had some problems with that and thought those items should belong to her, and she should be able to sell them. After a very long process and some very hurtful words, the day had finally come. My uncle, executor of the will, was there to oversee things, which I'm thankful for.

Everything went OK. There were still hurt feelings, at least on my end, but it was as smooth as I could hope for. The furniture is with us now, although my portion is at my mother's house since I have no room for anything.

Sunday we went to my other grandmother's house (my Granny) for Father's Day and to celebrate my sister's birthday. She shares her birthday with Father's Day just like I share mine with Mother's Day. We celebrated with my grandfather and other family members, and then went to visit with Z's father that evening. We had a nice visit, and a very nice day, although quite long. (It sucked when we got on the interstate and I discovered it was almost 100 miles until home...)

Today I applied for another job. I am so sick of this, and very down on myself right now. I'm in a foul mood, though I try not to be. I just want to have a place to get up and go every morning and feel useful and not like a bum. I'm freaking unemployed and it makes me feel crappy. I think that's why I haven't blogged--because I have nothing to say! I wake up late every day, have to convince myself to even get dressed sometimes, and read, watch tv, generally hang around with Z (we have never had so much together time), then when he leaves for his night class, I cook dinner (and find myself searching for elaborate, time-consuming new recipes just to have something to do), apply for jobs, check email, visit with him when he comes home, and go to bed too late for normal non-college students. Most days I don't even have errands to run, because what errands would you have if you didn't work? You would not have to go to the bank, you would not be able to go shopping, you wouldn't run somewhere on the way to somewhere else, because you're never on your way anywhere. See what I mean?

OK, that's enough of that. Just had to get it out of my system.